I ignored the alarm clock this morning and got up in a panic at 8.15. John drove me into Guiseley, and I managed, by some stroke of heavenly providence, to catch the 8.20 33 bus.
Do the indexing with Sarah all morning then complete the list of top christian names for 1975. I devoured piles of sandwiches for luncheon, and then showed Eileen how to file cuttings. So all in all, it's an industrious little day at the YP.
The weather is shocking at the moment. People are being crushed in freak winds and gales. The weather has all gone to cock in the past few years and I can forsee the day, not too far ahead, when Royal Ascot week in June is cancelled because of snow, and when temperatures reach 90F on Christmas Day.
I'm worried about the Carole affair. I would hate to hurt her in any way, but feel she is too dependent on me. I loathe responsibility of any kind and feel horror struck by the way she relies upon me for everything. I don't want to cut off our relationship completely, but wish I could have more freedom and time to go out seducing other nubile wenches. God! I am only 20. I don't want to be stuck with one woman at my time of life! Aaarrghh! Yes, I know I'm a hard hearted, vain, self-seeking swine, but at least I admit it. Lots of you would be ten times better off if you'd only accept your own faults and vices once every so often.
Go with Mum and Dad to the Commercial - and John of course. We have a goodf night. I wish we could go out in a family group more often than we do. Dad likes us to go out with him.
-==-
20101006
Monday January 19, 1976
I'll be glad when Wednesday is over and done with and the 40,000th edition of the Yorkshire Post is out of the way. Sydney Burton and I have been buggering about with the old files now for what seems like months.
The 40,000th edition is on Wednesday which is the day before the 75th anniversary of Queen Victoria's demise, and the day after the 40th anniversary of the death of George V. It's a pity really that King George couldn't have hung on for an extra day, or on the other hand it's a shame that Queen Victoria didn't die a day earlier.
From 3pm until 5 I helped Sarah go through the YP birth columns for 1975 to discover the most popular christian names. James and Elizabeth are in the lead at the moment and I'm surprised really. Elizabeth doesn't seem particularly popular to me at all.
Kathleen says that she's been to the Henry Jenkins pub many years ago and remarks how nice it is and that it's a typical country pub.
Later: Carole rings me to say she thinks I want to finish with her and that I'm just being 'nasty' to make her finish with me first. Being a typical coward I cannot end it and say nothing when she keeps asking me if I want to stop seeing her. I inform her that I soon become bored and that I'm a restless, roving soul. She understands and concludes: "Oh, I am relieved that it's all settled and worked out for the best". Nothing is settled or worked out at all, as far as I can see.
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The 40,000th edition is on Wednesday which is the day before the 75th anniversary of Queen Victoria's demise, and the day after the 40th anniversary of the death of George V. It's a pity really that King George couldn't have hung on for an extra day, or on the other hand it's a shame that Queen Victoria didn't die a day earlier.
From 3pm until 5 I helped Sarah go through the YP birth columns for 1975 to discover the most popular christian names. James and Elizabeth are in the lead at the moment and I'm surprised really. Elizabeth doesn't seem particularly popular to me at all.
Kathleen says that she's been to the Henry Jenkins pub many years ago and remarks how nice it is and that it's a typical country pub.
Later: Carole rings me to say she thinks I want to finish with her and that I'm just being 'nasty' to make her finish with me first. Being a typical coward I cannot end it and say nothing when she keeps asking me if I want to stop seeing her. I inform her that I soon become bored and that I'm a restless, roving soul. She understands and concludes: "Oh, I am relieved that it's all settled and worked out for the best". Nothing is settled or worked out at all, as far as I can see.
-==-
Sunday January 18, 1976
2nd Sunday after Epiphany. I wake at 11am and lay about in bed listening to the radio for an hour. John's bed is still in the same condition it was in at 2 o'clock this morning - unslept in, and I assume that he spent the night at Maria's.
Mum and Dad go off for the afternoon at 12 and Lynn and Dave follow in the same pattern shortly after.
Susan is down at Peter's, and I am left quite alone until Carole comes up at 3pm. I make bacon, sausages and toast for lunch and listen to records until 2, when an Erroll Flynn film based on the 1745 rebellion is screened on the BBC in glorious technicolour. Carole came at 3, and Sue and Peter followed shortly afterwards.
We didn't say much all day really. I can honestly say the more I see her the more I feel we should make a complete break of it. After all, six months is about as much as any man can stomach - when 20 years old anyway.
Miss Linda Smith rang at 6pm to warn me to be 'prompt' at her 21st birthday party on Saturday._________.
We (Carole and I) stay in to watch another film on the BBC and David takes her home at eleven o'clock. No doubt Carole had another good weep on Dave's shoulder when he dropped her at her house. I'll have to question him about it on the morrow.
--==--
Mum and Dad go off for the afternoon at 12 and Lynn and Dave follow in the same pattern shortly after.
Susan is down at Peter's, and I am left quite alone until Carole comes up at 3pm. I make bacon, sausages and toast for lunch and listen to records until 2, when an Erroll Flynn film based on the 1745 rebellion is screened on the BBC in glorious technicolour. Carole came at 3, and Sue and Peter followed shortly afterwards.
We didn't say much all day really. I can honestly say the more I see her the more I feel we should make a complete break of it. After all, six months is about as much as any man can stomach - when 20 years old anyway.
Miss Linda Smith rang at 6pm to warn me to be 'prompt' at her 21st birthday party on Saturday._________.
We (Carole and I) stay in to watch another film on the BBC and David takes her home at eleven o'clock. No doubt Carole had another good weep on Dave's shoulder when he dropped her at her house. I'll have to question him about it on the morrow.
--==--
20100910
Saturday January 17, 1976
Up at 10.30 and do nothing at all all day. Carole comes up at 3 o'clock and we stick more photographs in our album. We then watch an Alastair Sim film on the TV and laughed with Dad at the corn of it all.
We then go for a walk and end up at Maria's to find her in hair curlers and looking hilarious. We leave 30 minutes later after coffee and biscuits. Carole returns to her place and I return home for tea.
I go to Carole's at 8pm and hear that her brother _____ was picked up on a stolen motor bike today, but Carole points no finger of chastisement in his direction and laughs off the whole thing. We go over to the Hare & Hounds tap room with Sue and Peter and stay until 10.30. Carole and I then go through to the lounge where Peter M offers to take us to Oakwood Hall. We go with Pete, Keith, Carol S, and CD. Have a good night, but argue again with Carole about nothing specific. We don't get on at all now and it's only a matter of days before the whole bulwark of our relationship will crumble and crash to the ground. I can't say I'll be sorry because it's been foolish the way I've ignored our differences over the months and we are like chalk and cheese together. Home at 2.30.
-==-
Friday January 16, 1976
I stay in bed until after eleven and wake up feeling greatly improved from my two days break from toiling at the office.
CB rings to discover the nature of my indisposition and I joke with her about going out with Chris again. They went out together last January-February and I remark on the coincidence.
Ring Denny about the holiday booking and she says she and Tony will come up tonight to collect the deposit money.
Denny and Tony come up at 9 and Carole arrives minutes later. I give her the £30 for the deposit and they then took C and I to the Hare for a few drinks. We move on to the Red Lion at Burley-in-Wharfedale where I cut my finger on Tony's car door and at closing time we nip back to Tony's bachelor pad in Burley.________________.
Girls are funny things really. Maria asked Tony when he was going to make a honest woman of Denise & I could have crawled under the carpet. ________________________.
-==-
CB rings to discover the nature of my indisposition and I joke with her about going out with Chris again. They went out together last January-February and I remark on the coincidence.
Ring Denny about the holiday booking and she says she and Tony will come up tonight to collect the deposit money.
Denny and Tony come up at 9 and Carole arrives minutes later. I give her the £30 for the deposit and they then took C and I to the Hare for a few drinks. We move on to the Red Lion at Burley-in-Wharfedale where I cut my finger on Tony's car door and at closing time we nip back to Tony's bachelor pad in Burley.________________.
Girls are funny things really. Maria asked Tony when he was going to make a honest woman of Denise & I could have crawled under the carpet. ________________________.
-==-
Thursday January 15, 1976
When John came in from the pub last night we had a very intimate chat about our relationship with the ladies, and the following items of interest were disclosed. 1). Mrs P(hillips) went to see Molly Macdonald last Thursday afternoon and sat ranting and raving about the way I used Carole and how I let her buy all my Christmas presents and how I let her take me out all through the week and how I let her buy all the drinks and how I have the cheek to arrange a holiday without taking Carole with me!! Maria was witness to all this defamatory chit-chat and was angered by the way Mrs P started making the same claims about John. This incident coincides with Carole's behaviour on Friday. John also told me that Carole wasn't __________.
I was horrified and laid awake for hours thinking of the evilness of some people, and how some people have the nerve to go to church on a Sunday and then act like the devil for the rest of the week. Has Carole given her mother this impression, or does Mrs P just assume that this is going on? John also commented on how much Carole has changed, as did David at the weekend. _______________________.
I woke up today at 12.45pm. Feel a bit better after a long sleep and have fish and chips with John. Mum comes in from work at 1.30 and when Dad gets up I tell them about the things Mrs P's been saying. Dad gives me his advice and talks about women in general and the complex way they look at things. Mum says it's obvious that Carole thinks a lot more of me than I do of her and advises me to have a change if I feel bored and suffocated. I do feel suffocated and wish I were free of the ties, and I intend doing something about it shortly. OK, I like Carole, but marriage is not quite on for me, mate. Dad says he is so lucky because he met Mum when he was 16 and decided immediately that he wanted nobody else. Love like that must ne great.
However, I'm longer in the tooth and harder to match up with anyone.
Carole rings twice and is in tears on both occasions. I just feel useless and clumsy listening to a weeping, wailing woman slobbering down the phone in inaudible moans. We must get to the bottom of this trouble because it's getting on my nerves.
--==--
I was horrified and laid awake for hours thinking of the evilness of some people, and how some people have the nerve to go to church on a Sunday and then act like the devil for the rest of the week. Has Carole given her mother this impression, or does Mrs P just assume that this is going on? John also commented on how much Carole has changed, as did David at the weekend. _______________________.
I woke up today at 12.45pm. Feel a bit better after a long sleep and have fish and chips with John. Mum comes in from work at 1.30 and when Dad gets up I tell them about the things Mrs P's been saying. Dad gives me his advice and talks about women in general and the complex way they look at things. Mum says it's obvious that Carole thinks a lot more of me than I do of her and advises me to have a change if I feel bored and suffocated. I do feel suffocated and wish I were free of the ties, and I intend doing something about it shortly. OK, I like Carole, but marriage is not quite on for me, mate. Dad says he is so lucky because he met Mum when he was 16 and decided immediately that he wanted nobody else. Love like that must ne great.
However, I'm longer in the tooth and harder to match up with anyone.
Carole rings twice and is in tears on both occasions. I just feel useless and clumsy listening to a weeping, wailing woman slobbering down the phone in inaudible moans. We must get to the bottom of this trouble because it's getting on my nerves.
--==--
Wednesday January 14, 1976
I am completely shattered with cold. My nose glows like a lighthouse all day long and I come home and stagger around the place sneezing and wheezing like an 85 year-old. If I see the month out it will be a miracle. It's always the same every January. Christmas is over and done with and it's as if my resistance tries to commit suicide at the thought of no revelry and tinsel for yet another year.
The holiday is settled anyway. I rang Pete at 7.40am to receive his assent to my booking the Pacific Hotel, San Antonio, Ibiza, from June 27 to July 11, 1976. With his assent given I rang Denise, who at once set the whole system of booking into operation. I'm paying my £10 deposit to her tomorrow night.
Carole rings me at work at 4pm. She's still upset about the events of Saturday night and doesn't believe I've forgiven her foolishness. A child she is, nothing more, nothing less. No argument would have arisen if she had only come to me with her grievance in the first place.
Go to bed at 10pm and decide not to go to work in the morning. John comes in at 10.30 and tells me a horrible tale, the details of which I will recount to you in detail on the next page. But let me say this; something is going to be said and a certain line of action is to be taken which will make certain people waken up round here.
-==-
The holiday is settled anyway. I rang Pete at 7.40am to receive his assent to my booking the Pacific Hotel, San Antonio, Ibiza, from June 27 to July 11, 1976. With his assent given I rang Denise, who at once set the whole system of booking into operation. I'm paying my £10 deposit to her tomorrow night.
Carole rings me at work at 4pm. She's still upset about the events of Saturday night and doesn't believe I've forgiven her foolishness. A child she is, nothing more, nothing less. No argument would have arisen if she had only come to me with her grievance in the first place.
Go to bed at 10pm and decide not to go to work in the morning. John comes in at 10.30 and tells me a horrible tale, the details of which I will recount to you in detail on the next page. But let me say this; something is going to be said and a certain line of action is to be taken which will make certain people waken up round here.
-==-
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