Monday February 2, 1976

Up at 7.50 to discover my hair is standing on end and jutting out in all directions as though I've been electrocuted. No amount of brushing or combing restores it to the norm. Hell, it was only cut on Thursday!

Monday is usually quite busy with Sundays national newspapers and the rest, but by 2.30 I manage to have everything under control.

Delia Collis sent an estimate for John & Maria's flowers and it's very good really. Maria's bouquet will be £6 and Libby's, Lynn's and Sue's will be £3. Delia will do a good job.

See in the EP that Dorothy, Countess of Halifax died today aged 90. The old girl once lived at Hickleton Hall, near Goldthorpe, where Mrs Wagstaffe worked as a domestic servant 60 or 70 years ago. (Mrs Wagstaffe was our aged next door neighbour at Goldthorpe 10 years ago). Old Lord Halifax was Foreign Secretary at the time of Munich and almost became Prime Minister in May 1940 instead of Churchill.

Carole rang at lunchtime and we had a nice chat.

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Sunday February 1, 1976

4th Sunday after Epiphany. Don't wake up until afternoon. Mum, Carole, Lynn, Susan and Maria are downstairs preparing something to eat and seem to be getting on poor David's nerves.

John is like a corpse in his bed. He was actually violently sick in my new shoes, both there in the room swimming in veg.

The party was a great success though and John and Maria received a nice start to their future life together.

Edith Blackwell called round to see how we fared last night and she recounts, over sausage rolls and cold chicken legs, how Ernest lost his false teeth in the festivities.

At 2.30 Carole and I went for a long trek over Hawksworth Moor and almost froze to death in the process. My fingers were ice cold even in gloves and I've never known a day to be so cold and miserable. We got back at 4.30 before it began to grow dark.

I cannot understand why I wanted to finish with Carole on Friday night because we normally get on so well together, and today was no exception. I seem to be able to change my mind about something in the space of a matter of minutes.

We all watched television, and I fell asleep in the chair which is unusual for me.

John and Maria went down to Silverdale to look at a semi-detached house and came back with favourale reports. They'll get off to a nice start if they can begin with a new house.

We all looked through old photographs. Carole and I walked to Harry Ramsden's at 9.30 and I saw her on a bus homeward. I return home via Thorpe Lane and just about freeze to death for the second time today.

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Saturday January 31, 1976

Marita, 21. John & Maria get engaged. However, this historic and fabulous event was marred by my antics this afternoon when I 'finished' with Carole on the phone at 2.45.

It was something I decided to do last night, and is something I regret having done. She wept and said she loved me and wanted to know my reasons, and so I went down to meet her at the White Cross. I marched down Thorpe Lane wrapped only in a scarf and was soon frozen stiff. Carole met me walking down the lane and we both walk back to the Cross. She couldn't stop crying and I became horribly upset by it. Her devotion and love for me was so clearly obvious, and I realised that life wouldn't be the same without her. Both blue with cold and wet with tears we walked towards Menston, and stood weeping on each others shoulders near Highroyds Hospital. I asked her to go on loving me. Don't ask me why I changed my mind because as far as I was concerned I had finished with her, and all I had to do was walk away, but when it came to it I could not take my arms from around her.

She went into Guiseley to get John & Maria a present and I returned home with a severe case of frost-bite.

Later: Met Carole at her place at 7.15 and go over to the Hare & Hounds immediately. For one and a half hours we're on our own. The others begin to roll in at 9pm and Mum & Dad come in with Jim and Molly.

Maria's engagement ring is a diamond set in white gold and looks perfect. The party starts at about 11 and is a great success. All the mob came suitably furnished with presents.

Chris and Christine were the last ones to leave. John went to bed at about 2.30 and spewed his guts up. Sat up with Dave B, Lynn, Carole, Maria & Mum until about 6am.

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Friday January 30, 1976

January has certainly been a hectic and eventful month. To make matters worse Helen L came in tonight sporting an engagement ring from her boyfriend in Worcester, and the shock of both Helen and John's news proved too much for CD to bear. She was near to tears and needed a few strong drinks to revive her.

Carole was quiet again. John says it's because Maria has not asked her to play at bridesmaids, but I cannot believe she'd be so childish. Her mood is because John & Maria's future seems secured, whilst ours just meanders along. Her childishness at times staggers me and makes me say and do rash things that I regret.

I come home with John and Maria in the spitfire at about 11.15 and sit brooding in the dining room about Carole. I just don't want to see her again. A clean sweep will make things better. Oh I don't know really. Is it just a phase I'm going through?


to be continued

Thursday January 29, 1976

I had my hair cut at lunchtime and took the rest of the day off.

Dad takes me to the Hare & Hounds at 8 o'clock and we have a quiet drink together. We discuss the forthcoming wedding.___________.

At 8.30 Carole and I go the Fleece in Horsforth, and Chris came in shortly afterwards. He tells me he is to be transferred to Batley and is taking a cut in salary and will have to buy a car and will probably have to cancel his holiday. This is all we bloody well need. It seems as if Peter and I will have to pack the Ibiza plan in too because we can't go with just the two of us.

We go down to Chris's where Maria and John look tired and exhausted. The poor things have had a strenuous, overpowering few days I know, and they go home at 10 o'clock to get some decent sleep.

Chris shows Carole and I the 1975 holiday film and brings us home in his Dad's car after 11. I play the Santana LP which Carole, bless her, bought me today, and go to bed at 1.30.

Mum and Dad are round at the Macdonalds until after 3am.

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Wednesday January 28, 1976

John and Maria come round this evening to discuss the wedding plans and things. Peter and Dave also came up, but I'm not seeing Carole until tomorrow.

They discuss the usual things, viz bridesmaids, flowers and cards and I suggest Delia Collis (Sarah's mum) for the flowers, because she's something of an expert in the flower arranging department. I will get an estimate from Sarah tomorrow.

I am confirmed as the 'best man' and feel nervous already at the prospect of giving a speech to the assembled multitude on March 13.

I say they should hire a Rolls-Royce for the occasion, but Maria astounds me by saying a Rolls costs £50 an hour to rent.

I depart to bed at 12. Everyone is in high spirits about the wedding.

P.S. My future sister-in-law is a Scot. She was born in Glasgow. You'll all be thrilled by that morsel of information.

P.P.S. Saw Marita on the bus at 4.20 and informed her of the engagement. It will be her 21st on Saturday.

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Tuesday January 27, 1976

I despatched a letter to David in Worcester on the John/Maria subject. I hope he'll get home for the celebrations this coming weekend.

Work was quite busy and I'm still doing the YP indexing with Sarah, who tells me, incidentally, that her father has been promoted and sent to Sheffield. Is this goodbye to Sarah Collis? If it is I won't bother coming all the way to the YP from Ripon, because she's the only decent person in the place.

I come home from work to find Dad in bed completely taken over by 'flu, and Mum isn't in a much better state, and is making dinner.

John rushes in and has a bath and then goes straight to see the priest (Father Scannell), with Maria, at Burley-in-Wharfedale. John hob nobbing with Roman Catholic priests in the dead of night! Who'd have thought it? You could knock me down with a feather, you really could.

It came to me today that my life with John is more or less over. For twenty years we have seen each other every day, and it's going to be hard getting used to not having him around. For 20 years we've shared a bedroom, and in just over six weeks he'll be gone forever - sad really.

Molly Macdonald rings at 8.30 to confirm that the wedding day is March 13, and it will take place at Burley, and that the reception will be at Acacia House, and that each family can have 25 guests each not including the principal participants. I am confimed as best man, and Lynn, Susan and Elizabeth will be bridesmaids. I'm having a nervous breakdown.______________.

Bed at midnight after no sighting of the -happy couple'. _________.

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