_. Up and out to the YP early to avoid Dad. I phoned Mum at Burley but she didn't answer. I then phoned Lynn. ____. At 7pm Mum phoned me, then Dave came here to collect Dad to take him to Burley for a 'reunion'. Ally came at 8:30 and we went to the Drop. Some hideous Carol singers came in. I could have strangled them. On to Oakwood. Got thoroughly sozzled. Found a wheel trim and brought it home for Dad, at 3am. I stole into Susan's room and she informed me that Mum & Dad are once again under the same roof. Such a relief. My silly parents - behaving like Rod Stewart and Britt Ekland.
-=-
20200403
Wednesday December 19, 1979
_. Wasn't that a delightful little diversion? For the first time in the seven year history of this journal I handed over the pen to another. Subsequently, the entries for the last few days have not been my own, but those of Miss Alison Mary Dixon.
It was a ghastly day... or should I say night? Out at 7pm with Sarah, Eileen and Carol J to Salvo's. I had first been to tea with Auntie Delia at Ivory Towers. The annual YP library Christmas 'nosh up' is always a failure, and even Kathleen's planned absence didn't help. We spent £10 from the kitty which was donated by an obliging Swede for whom we made photostats of the Yorkshire Ripper cuttings. In other words we dined out courtesy of the Yorkshire Ripper. Despite the paper hats and plastic whistles the evening was a bore. At home Mum and Dad were extremely frosty. Things haven't been too good lately and the sound of raised voices penetrated the bedroom wall, and I realised only to well that I was in for 'one of those nights'. Mum got up and drove to Burley.
-=-
It was a ghastly day... or should I say night? Out at 7pm with Sarah, Eileen and Carol J to Salvo's. I had first been to tea with Auntie Delia at Ivory Towers. The annual YP library Christmas 'nosh up' is always a failure, and even Kathleen's planned absence didn't help. We spent £10 from the kitty which was donated by an obliging Swede for whom we made photostats of the Yorkshire Ripper cuttings. In other words we dined out courtesy of the Yorkshire Ripper. Despite the paper hats and plastic whistles the evening was a bore. At home Mum and Dad were extremely frosty. Things haven't been too good lately and the sound of raised voices penetrated the bedroom wall, and I realised only to well that I was in for 'one of those nights'. Mum got up and drove to Burley.
-=-
Tuesday December 18, 1979
_. [In Ally's own hand]
"After a good two hours sleep in Michael's bed it was once again the hour of doom! I struggled to leave the warm folds of the continental quilt, and so, as usual these days, I was late for work. Just for a change, the evening was spent in each others company beginning with a visit to 7, Lawn Road, where we were greeted with delight and tumblers of whisky. I had Christmas cards waiting for me from the Pinder residence in Southampton addressed to 'C/O Mr & Mrs D. Baker'.
Michael and I left the always busy Bakers ironing and screwing brass handles on kitchen cupboard doors to spend a couple of hours in togetherness. But, as if fate wants to thwart of solitude, George Waite joined us for the remainder of the evening at the Fox and Hounds.
I think I have said enough now, so.... just remember ... Miss Melissa Teasdale, a loved one, thanks the author of this journal Michael Lawrence Rhodes for the very great honour bestowed!
-=-
"After a good two hours sleep in Michael's bed it was once again the hour of doom! I struggled to leave the warm folds of the continental quilt, and so, as usual these days, I was late for work. Just for a change, the evening was spent in each others company beginning with a visit to 7, Lawn Road, where we were greeted with delight and tumblers of whisky. I had Christmas cards waiting for me from the Pinder residence in Southampton addressed to 'C/O Mr & Mrs D. Baker'.
Michael and I left the always busy Bakers ironing and screwing brass handles on kitchen cupboard doors to spend a couple of hours in togetherness. But, as if fate wants to thwart of solitude, George Waite joined us for the remainder of the evening at the Fox and Hounds.
I think I have said enough now, so.... just remember ... Miss Melissa Teasdale, a loved one, thanks the author of this journal Michael Lawrence Rhodes for the very great honour bestowed!
-=-
Monday December 17, 1979
_. [In Ally's own hand]
"Once again, the evening was an unbelievable success.... we seem so inseparable .... who would have ever thought it?
Debbie was hostess for the night ... a private 18th birthday party at 'Jeeves' in Burley-in-Wharfedale. Susie stole the limelight wearing a little black, split-skirt number! After driving a dismayed Gus home - [he had somehow smashed a sink in the gents and the manager had threatened him with: 'pay up, or we'll see you in court.'] I sat drinking hot Nescafe with Michael.
-=-
"Once again, the evening was an unbelievable success.... we seem so inseparable .... who would have ever thought it?
Debbie was hostess for the night ... a private 18th birthday party at 'Jeeves' in Burley-in-Wharfedale. Susie stole the limelight wearing a little black, split-skirt number! After driving a dismayed Gus home - [he had somehow smashed a sink in the gents and the manager had threatened him with: 'pay up, or we'll see you in court.'] I sat drinking hot Nescafe with Michael.
-=-
Sunday December 16, 1979
_. [In Ally's own hand]
...... "Feeling slightly delicate. I was made to go downstairs at noon to eat fried eggs! The faithful Spitfire managed to carry my Christmas tree and couple of 'very close friends' to Club Street. We stopped off at the 'Second West' pub in Lidget Green. Afterwards Michael and I were amazed at the skill David G showed for hanging balls, wrapping buckets with Christmas paper, &c.
Dear Auntie Nora made us all welcome later with Yorkshire puddings and roast pork... this, combined with a pre-dinner aperitif, and Riesling with the dinner, knocked us all out. The evening ended to the delightful descant tones of Michael and David snoring".
-=-
...... "Feeling slightly delicate. I was made to go downstairs at noon to eat fried eggs! The faithful Spitfire managed to carry my Christmas tree and couple of 'very close friends' to Club Street. We stopped off at the 'Second West' pub in Lidget Green. Afterwards Michael and I were amazed at the skill David G showed for hanging balls, wrapping buckets with Christmas paper, &c.
Dear Auntie Nora made us all welcome later with Yorkshire puddings and roast pork... this, combined with a pre-dinner aperitif, and Riesling with the dinner, knocked us all out. The evening ended to the delightful descant tones of Michael and David snoring".
-=-
Saturday December 15, 1979
_. [In Ally's own hand]
"Love is ... letting a loved one write in his precious, sodding, bugger of a diary."
"Today was Christmas tree picking day!! After frantic phone calls from the Baker residence pleading with me to get up.... we went, Lynn, David, Chris, Julie and Dave Allinson, and me, in a howling gale ... to select six delightful Christmas trees from a farm in deepest Bramhope. During this time my precious Michael was out entertaining his quaint Stockport guest at one [possibly many] of the drinking houses in Guiseley. The afternoon continued with pre-Christmas festivities. Whisky and home-brewed hock being favourites.... Michael and Lynn, typical sister and brother, arguing over which colour Christmas paper to wrap around the barrel of the tree. Tree decorations, wassail cups, flying everywhere. My beloved, as he promised many weeks ago, insisted I dress in 'kagool' and wellies and dragged me out into the wild evening to pick holly. A truly romantic setting! A quick half pint of punch at Peter Lazenby's didn't go amiss. In fact, after Harry R[amsden's] fish and chips we caused something of an uproar in the Drop and the Yorkshire Rose tap room, then Guiseley Working Mens' Club - Michael dressed in one of his father's old boiler suits and flat cap, and David Glynn is a hideous red tie, beret, and suit jacket with stuffed birds stitched to the shoulder. A sight not to be missed! Lazenby's party was wonderful, to say nothing for the 'bloody hot curry'. Lights went out at 7am on Sunday morning.
-=-
"Love is ... letting a loved one write in his precious, sodding, bugger of a diary."
"Today was Christmas tree picking day!! After frantic phone calls from the Baker residence pleading with me to get up.... we went, Lynn, David, Chris, Julie and Dave Allinson, and me, in a howling gale ... to select six delightful Christmas trees from a farm in deepest Bramhope. During this time my precious Michael was out entertaining his quaint Stockport guest at one [possibly many] of the drinking houses in Guiseley. The afternoon continued with pre-Christmas festivities. Whisky and home-brewed hock being favourites.... Michael and Lynn, typical sister and brother, arguing over which colour Christmas paper to wrap around the barrel of the tree. Tree decorations, wassail cups, flying everywhere. My beloved, as he promised many weeks ago, insisted I dress in 'kagool' and wellies and dragged me out into the wild evening to pick holly. A truly romantic setting! A quick half pint of punch at Peter Lazenby's didn't go amiss. In fact, after Harry R[amsden's] fish and chips we caused something of an uproar in the Drop and the Yorkshire Rose tap room, then Guiseley Working Mens' Club - Michael dressed in one of his father's old boiler suits and flat cap, and David Glynn is a hideous red tie, beret, and suit jacket with stuffed birds stitched to the shoulder. A sight not to be missed! Lazenby's party was wonderful, to say nothing for the 'bloody hot curry'. Lights went out at 7am on Sunday morning.
-=-
Friday December 14, 1979
_. [In Ally's own hand]
"Michael, having washed all the drinking vessels, staggered into bed with me! __________.
A venture into Leeds to collect M's wage packet was followed by a strange little drink at the Peacock, in Yeadon. The smell of deep fried scampi affected Michael in an adverse way, and so I drove the sick looking alcoholic peasant back to his doss house. Four hours later saw the arrival of Sir Arthur Sidebottom, the Australian sports correspondent [aka David Glynn]. The Drop and the Fox & Hounds had the honour of our presence.
-=-
"Michael, having washed all the drinking vessels, staggered into bed with me! __________.
A venture into Leeds to collect M's wage packet was followed by a strange little drink at the Peacock, in Yeadon. The smell of deep fried scampi affected Michael in an adverse way, and so I drove the sick looking alcoholic peasant back to his doss house. Four hours later saw the arrival of Sir Arthur Sidebottom, the Australian sports correspondent [aka David Glynn]. The Drop and the Fox & Hounds had the honour of our presence.
-=-
Thursday December 13, 1979
_. [In Ally's own hand]
[as dictated by Mr Michael Firefly]
It was with great relief that the author regained consciousness feeling much better in himself. Miss Dixon now takes up the tale:
"On arrival, not only was a glass of the famous QC sherry handed over, but also a glass of home brewed carrot wine. The night was enhanced by the joviality of Mr & Mrs Baker, the Rt Hon James Nason and his glorious wife Madame Margarette. [deletion] .... the authoress is aware that people like to shoot grouse occasionally.
-=-
[as dictated by Mr Michael Firefly]
It was with great relief that the author regained consciousness feeling much better in himself. Miss Dixon now takes up the tale:
"On arrival, not only was a glass of the famous QC sherry handed over, but also a glass of home brewed carrot wine. The night was enhanced by the joviality of Mr & Mrs Baker, the Rt Hon James Nason and his glorious wife Madame Margarette. [deletion] .... the authoress is aware that people like to shoot grouse occasionally.
-=-
Wednesday December 12, 1979
_. [compiled by Ally's own hand]
My darling Michael was far from present at the delightful YP. My little heart sank as Carol informed me of his whereabouts... at home in his bed! The spitfire, minus petrol, got me to his side. I threw his letter at him and left. I waited for him to ring, but no, as usual he left me in despair. My pianoforte sounded out of tune as my delicate fingers bashed out the notes of the 'Fairy Waltz' - I played like I have never played before!
After his visit from 'Miss Melissa Teasdale' the aforementioned Mr Rhodes took to his bed in a haze of delirium and Lemsips. Goodnight!!!!
-=-
My darling Michael was far from present at the delightful YP. My little heart sank as Carol informed me of his whereabouts... at home in his bed! The spitfire, minus petrol, got me to his side. I threw his letter at him and left. I waited for him to ring, but no, as usual he left me in despair. My pianoforte sounded out of tune as my delicate fingers bashed out the notes of the 'Fairy Waltz' - I played like I have never played before!
After his visit from 'Miss Melissa Teasdale' the aforementioned Mr Rhodes took to his bed in a haze of delirium and Lemsips. Goodnight!!!!
-=-
Tuesday December 11, 1979
_. [NOTE] I think I injured my hand and was rendered unable to place pen to paper. I handed my diary over to Ally and gave her permission to compile the journal.....
[deletion] ... You were out living it up with a little dolly bird. Anyway, that's beside the point! Meanwhile at Standale Rise, Pudsey, Michael was feeling the first twinges of his nasty disease at the homestead of his dear Aunty Mabel. Snot perfused from his nasal cavity, cascading over the simple Spam sandwiches that lay before him. Next .....
-=-
[deletion] ... You were out living it up with a little dolly bird. Anyway, that's beside the point! Meanwhile at Standale Rise, Pudsey, Michael was feeling the first twinges of his nasty disease at the homestead of his dear Aunty Mabel. Snot perfused from his nasal cavity, cascading over the simple Spam sandwiches that lay before him. Next .....
-=-
Monday December 10, 1979
_. [Indecipherable other than] What now follows is an account of a week in the life of Mrs Melissa Teasdale [a nickname I gave to Ally].
-=-
-=-
Saturday December 8, 1979
_. Got out of bed at 10am to MM on the phone asking Ally and I to attend tonight's wedding party. They are marrying at Rawdon Church this afternoon. I explained that we are having a Christmas party and cannot make it.
A busy day of preparation. Ally raided her Snoopy money box and we went into Bradford for hours of gruesome and frantic shopping. I was given the task of carrying £7 in pennies around the town. She had every intention of attempting to spend the coins in a supermarket. Obviously, I strongly disagreed with this ridiculous idea.
Back at Club Street I bedecked the house with decorations and festooned the tree with more balls. Inflated balloons too. Ally prepared a buffet, cheese things and creamy stuff whilst I huffed and puffed.
At 7:30 we went with Sue and Peter to the Dog & Gun at Apperley. Sue says life has been frightful at home today and Mum is behaving as if deranged and had been in tears on the phone to Lynn.
Back to Club Street for 8:30. Lynn, Dave, Mum, Dad, Jim, Margaret, Julie N arrived at 9. I felt long, uneasy silences in the gaps between the records. Mum was wearing a brave face but obviously not feeling herself, and Margaret, who is usually very noisy, sat straight faced and impassive. But then she moved over to the piano, raised the lid and banged away in a hideous fashion. It soon became clear that she cannot play a single note. She is nothing short of a lunatic.
-=-
A busy day of preparation. Ally raided her Snoopy money box and we went into Bradford for hours of gruesome and frantic shopping. I was given the task of carrying £7 in pennies around the town. She had every intention of attempting to spend the coins in a supermarket. Obviously, I strongly disagreed with this ridiculous idea.
Back at Club Street I bedecked the house with decorations and festooned the tree with more balls. Inflated balloons too. Ally prepared a buffet, cheese things and creamy stuff whilst I huffed and puffed.
At 7:30 we went with Sue and Peter to the Dog & Gun at Apperley. Sue says life has been frightful at home today and Mum is behaving as if deranged and had been in tears on the phone to Lynn.
Back to Club Street for 8:30. Lynn, Dave, Mum, Dad, Jim, Margaret, Julie N arrived at 9. I felt long, uneasy silences in the gaps between the records. Mum was wearing a brave face but obviously not feeling herself, and Margaret, who is usually very noisy, sat straight faced and impassive. But then she moved over to the piano, raised the lid and banged away in a hideous fashion. It soon became clear that she cannot play a single note. She is nothing short of a lunatic.
-=-
Friday December 7, 1979
_. This was one of those rare and wonderful Fridays when I do not suffer a multitude of self-inflicted agonies brought on by outrageous lashings of wicked, chilled alcohol.
This evening I returned home to find Mama tucked up in bed with stomach pains. I suspect they are probably pains of a menopausal nature. Dad and Sue were messing around making tea. I made myself a cheese sandwich. At 7 I was back on the open road to Bradford. It took an hour to get to Lidget Green. A tiresome journey across that dark city.
Ally I had our usual crawl around a few of the local taverns. Afterwards we erected Mum's 6" silver Christmas tree, adorning it with balls and flashing lights. This was a temporary measure just for tomorrow night's party because next week Dave B is getting her a real tree from Chris Baker's farm.
Ally fell into a coma on the hearth rug. Can you hear the distant toll of wedding bells perhaps?
-=-
This evening I returned home to find Mama tucked up in bed with stomach pains. I suspect they are probably pains of a menopausal nature. Dad and Sue were messing around making tea. I made myself a cheese sandwich. At 7 I was back on the open road to Bradford. It took an hour to get to Lidget Green. A tiresome journey across that dark city.
Ally I had our usual crawl around a few of the local taverns. Afterwards we erected Mum's 6" silver Christmas tree, adorning it with balls and flashing lights. This was a temporary measure just for tomorrow night's party because next week Dave B is getting her a real tree from Chris Baker's farm.
Ally fell into a coma on the hearth rug. Can you hear the distant toll of wedding bells perhaps?
-=-
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