Saturday January 19, 1985

 Moorhouse Inn

Samuel had a lousy night and kept us awake at intervals. This broken night gave Ally a touch of the screaming Adolf Hitlers. The girl cannot miss out on her sleep. We went out at 9 and had Samuel photographed in his sailor suit at Boots. He looked a little toff. On to the pine shop on Burley Road where we spent £240 on bedside cabinets and a large chest of drawers. The salesperson looked like a painted doll. Ally did her very best to get some discount but the painted doll turned a deaf ear. I have never been comfortable bartering. Such an un-English thing to do. The flea markets and bazaars of Casablanca maybe, but not Kirkstall. We also went to Morrison's and spent £50 on nothing. 

Back at the Moorhouse for 1 o'clock we found found Mum very bright and bustling around making lunch as in days of yore. She says the day had begun very badly because she had broken down catching sight of her reflection in the bathroom mirror. It's so cruel that she should look so ghastly when she has always been so self-conscious. At 2 we ate stew and Yorkshire puds together whilst listening to organ music from the Royal Albert Hall by Nicholas Kynaston (a cassette from David Howard). Ally found it very morbid. 

Mabel, Marlene, Frank and Debbie came at 4. 

(to be continued)

Friday January 18, 1985

 Moorhouse Inn

John and Janette moved to Leathley Crescent this morning. Dad went to help, dropping Mum at Lynn's. __________. They returned after 6. Hilda had phoned just before they came in and she asked me if Mum could have any medical treatment at all, and I felt choked, and just gargled down the blower. ________. I went down and stood with Leonard (or 'FA' as he is known because he resembles the famous football cup of that name). Ally went to bed, but Samuel kept her awake.

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Thursday January 17, 1985

 Moorhouse Inn

We expected Donna Lea all day but she didn't materialise. This evening we were preparing for our Guiseley excursion when in walked John and Janette. Ally and I went downstairs under the pretext of waiting for Donna and after a decent interval we returned to the family to find them all silent and sitting uncomfortably. We  went to Sue's leaving them staring blankly at Bob Hope and Bing Crosby in 'Road to Rio'.   ____________.

At Sue's we found Lynn and Dave. I sat with Lynn on the settee and she cried buckets when I told her what conversation had passed between me and Dad last Thursday, and that he would live on alone at Waltergarth. What does she expect him to do? Lynn is so naive about life and death. Truly worrying. Move to a terrace house in Guiseley and mope around for the next 20 years? Sue looked slim and jovial, but is worried about her own condition and is undergoing tests. Chris was at a similar age to Ben now when she had that awful thing in Oct '82. John and Janette arrived and said that Mum had given them a 'rough ride' and Janette says she almost broke down at Mum's coldness. _______. The baby is due in July and they are going to live in unmarried bliss at Leathley Crescent, Menston, to where they flit tomorrow.  _________. We all did a good deal of drinking. I attacked the whisky with some gusto. Janette spoke of the harrowing aspects of cancer and recalled the gruelling deaths of people she has known. I did not find this helpful. We got home at 3am and cooked fish and chips. Both of us feel quite sick.

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Wednesday January 16, 1985

 Moorhouse Inn

Mum had a very low day and stayed abed, refusing to get out. Dad was quiet and he didn't sit with her as he usually does. [Redaction].

Who should walk in at lunchtime but Graham John Dixon traveling from Doncaster and on his way to Manchester. He ate lunch and I stood swilling ale with him.

to Mabel's for tea. Samuel in his sailor suit. Thick snow everywhere. She spoke of Mum and spoke of faith in God. Dear auntie said she wishes she could take Mum's place. She is 16 years older. I sat like a cabbage eating lemon cake. Ally does most of the talking these days. We got home at about 6:30. Mum was still in bed. Mabel sent her a home grown daffodil.

I phoned Susan to say we would definitely go to Guiseley tomorrow because John and Janette are coming here to give their news to Mum and Dad. She said she would speak to John about his approach to Mama during the day tomorrow because he's going to Thorpe Lane to build a wardrobe.

Down in the bar I sat with Harold. Rob Piper came in. We are going with him and Kath to the managers meeting on January 28. Upstairs we ate cockles and mussels. Mum, laying wide awake in bed, says Dad has been out cold since 9:30.

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Tuesday January 15, 1985

 Moorhouse Inn

Snow falling. Horribly cold.

Princess Michael is 40. She says she is known as 'MC' in the family and not as 'Our Val'. MC is of course Marie-Christine.

Mum pottered about in the kitchen making sheep's head broth and dumplings. It is an old Wilson family recipe and now more or less extinct because sheep's heads, like cod roes, are scarce. A great pity. The pub was quiet. Three old men supping ice-cold mild in sub-zero temperatures. We ate at 2. Afterwards Ally and I went out with Samuel and scaled Dewsbury Rd in arctic conditions to buy cod roes and other provisions. Samuel refused to wear gloves and had blue fingers. 

Ally went down and opened the pub at 5:30 and I went down at 8. We sat with Harold Wilkinson and Co. talking about regional dialects, and way that all Londoners think that Yorkshiremen 'work down't pit', eat tripe and onions and wear clogs on the cobbled streets, &c. 

Dad sat reading the Oxford Dictionary of Quotations. He suggested to Mum that we might visit Auntie Mabel tomorrow, but she says she isn't up to it. Later I phoned auntie and she said they might come here at the weekend. Watched 'Edgar Wallace' until 12:30 and ate cheese and biscuits. Still no word from John and Janette. Little buggers.

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Monday January 14, 1985

 Moorhouse Inn

Snow has fallen through the night and the moor looks like Gstaad today. Ally took Samuel out to the bank and the market at 9. Poor Maureen downstairs has had one hell of a weekend. Sam (her husband) suffered a heart attack in Rotherham on Friday night, only a mild one, but she's been traveling back and forth visiting. His singing days are numbered. 

Samuel's confidence is growing and he can totter around the lounge from one end to the other. He no longer looks like a baby especially in his short sleeved shirt. He looks like a boy. He brightens our day. God knows how glum we would all be if we didn't have him tottering around. Dave G has sent Sam a birthday card containing a £5 note. The proud godfather doing his duty. Donna Lea has spoken to Ally re toilet paper, &c. She might call in on Thursday evening. We have a list of things for her. 

Pool night. Six players. Christmas has made a mess of our routine 'games night'. Samuel woke at 10:30 and so Maureen had to walk home in the snow. The boy had a bad night, and so did we.

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Sunday January 13, 1985

 Moorhouse Inn

1st Sunday after Epiphany

News: Janette discovered on Thursday that she is pregnant. The news was whispered to Ally by Lynn in the midst of Samuel's party.

Mum and Samuel.

Our so-called 'day off'. I refer to is as an Irish day off because it is always busier than on a working day. Ally did a pile of washing and I cleaned out a greasy fryer. Then, who should appear but Hilda and Tony and little Hayley. We also expected John and Janette, to come break their news to Mum and Dad, but they didn't appear. Hilda and Tony stayed a couple of hours and the four of them messed around smelling each others hair after Mum had remarked that Dad's hair smelled 'doggy'. Her sense of smell is suddenly very acute. Mum asked after the health of Ruby's son-in-law to be told that he is having radium treatment and is very poorly. Hayley played with our wide-eyed Samuel and they both danced 'Ring a Ring 'o Roses' with Dad. We had a corned beef hash, and I scalded my knees with boiling lard making Yorkshire puddings and dancing around in the kitchen minus my trousers. I could easily become a naked chef. Mum was 'low' after her sister's departure. Her appetite is shocking.

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Saturday January 12, 1985

 Moorhouse Inn

Mum: Jan, 1985

Samuel Lawrence Dixon Rhodes is one year old today. We are very proud parents. A busy morning. Ally opened Samuel's presents and cards in Mum and Dad's bedroom and we all sang 'Happy Birthday To You'. A bitterly cold day and I took Samuel out in his pushchair to Grandways to buy vol au vent cases and frozen sausage rolls. The little boy slumbered peacefully in his bright yellow snow suit. Back at the Moorhouse Ally met me to say Auntie Hilda had just phoned Mum, and she'd broken down afterwards. We made sandwiches and mushroom vol au vent and pottered around until 2.  After his sleep Samuel was dressed in his sailor suit to receive his guests at 2:30. Lynn and Sue and Co. A splendid tea. Samuel blew out the candles on his sticky cake, and then all the other children had a turn. Little Katie was sat with a large slice of boiled ham glued over her face, like a mask. Mum surprised the girls by her brightness and they thought she looks so much better than on Jan 2. Sam was mesmerized by his cousins. Dad, so good at parties, organised a game of 'cowboys and Indians'. It all fell apart by about 6pm. Downstairs, Karen, Steve, Jill and Tim came at 9 o'clock. Jill, pregnant, looked remarkably well but suffers from morning sickness and was violently sick over one of the mighty stone lions protecting the entrance of Leeds Town Hall recently. They went upstairs, but in pairs, to see Mum and Dad, who went to bed at 12. Our guests stayed until about 2 and the lads disposed of the birthday party left-overs. I went through the dictionary with Jill selecting suitable boys christian names. Her baby is due on July 12.

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Friday January 11, 1985

 Moorhouse Inn

Out this morning into town to swap things at Marks and Spencers. Bought our son a pair of blue shoes for £8.99. Daylight bloody robbery.

Mr Tebbit has returned to work, three months after the Brighton bomb. Samuel Rhodes is growing in confidence on his feet and spends more and more time tottering around. Hard to believe he is one year-old tomorrow. 

Mum has made it quite clear she wants to say at the Moorhouse and not return to Swaledale or Guiseley. However, the brewery won't like the idea of us taking in lodgers, but we'll keep our cards close to our chest and not inform them. I do not want Rob Piper knowing because the dear boy is such a blabber-mouth. 

Ally stayed upstairs tonight, cleaning furiously. Cousin Sam appeared and asked about seeing Dad and he went away long-faced when I said he wasn't coming downstairs and into the pub tonight. Mum was watching a James Garner film. Ally and I do a good deal of whispering in corners these days.

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Thursday January 10, 1985

 Moorhouse Inn

A horrible, sad day. A quiet lunchtime in the pub. At 1:30 Dad and I set off for Horton and from the start our emotions were damp to say the least. It was getting away from Mum, you see. We didn't have to keep smiles on our faces and we both blubbered in the Renault on the drive up. We stopped at the Anchor Inn at Gargrave for a pint of Theakston's. Dad spoke of the future. He will stay on at Waltergarth regardless, and carry on with bed and breakfasts without Mum. The sight of Pen-y-Ghent shrouded in snow was quite beautiful. The house, in darkness, was so sad. I was choked. I haven't ever seen the house without Mum bustling around. The neighbour Frances appeared and as she was leaving a woman phoned to book a week in August, and I had to tell her we could take no bookings due to Mum's illness. At this I crumbled. We packed up Mum's clothes. A nightmare. We left at 5:30 and returned to Club Street, then stopped off at the White Cross for a drink. Home for 6:30. Mum was bright. She had mixed some pancake mixture for her evening repast. Mum and Dad offered to baby-sit and Ally and I went over to the Butcher's Arms at Pudsey at 8:30. Saw Phil (of Phil and Denise fame), and then my cousin, Derek Myers. On at 10:30 to Jacomelli's on Boar Lane (Leeds) for T-bone steaks and a bottle of wine. Quite pissed. Ally says that Sarh phoned at 2 to say that a couple had been to the front desk at the YP asking for me. But who?

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Wednesday January 9, 1985

Sailor Samuel.

 Moorhouse Inn

Mum and Dad got up and decided to to to Guiseley for the day to see Sue. ______. Mum borrowed Ally's pearl necklace to adorn her precious throat. Lots of kisses goodbye and off they went. They returned this evening and looked exhausted after lunching with Sue and dining with Lynn. They had a good day, and both girls had been delighted to see them. Dad says these outings are very important because Mum needs exercise. Sitting too long makes her lethargic. We decided to drive to Horton tomorrow to collect more clothes for Mum. Her wardrobe consists of Lynn's large maternity clothes, a wrinkled pinafore dress and boots.

We went into town and spent a fortune buying clothes for Samuel at Schofield's. Lots didn't fit, but we found a sailor suit which fits to perfection. Back at home for tea Samuel was showing off his new outfit and suddenly set off and WALKED HIS FIRST UNAIDED STEPS. A miraculous sight. Our squeals of delight penetrated down to Maureen in the tap room. You should have seen the beam on his little face. Ally stood ironing tonight and I went down at intervals to see Audrey. 

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