I went from the YP by train to Pudsey where I joined Mum and Dad at Auntie Mabel's for tea. She made us a nice salad and afterwards we sat with a few drinks before the television. It's now almost certainly been confirmed that my Uncle Jack (Myers) is suffering from cancer of the pancreas. Sadly, Jackie (Myers) didn't arrive as planned at Auntie's. I haven't laid eyes on Jacqueline since May, 1976.
... You could all employ yourselves doing something beneficial to the community instead of eavesdropping on me. Blimey, I probably died years ago, and none of this drivel will matter when all is said and done.