Thursday September 14, 1978

Pete N and I went to Leeds at 7:30 to meet Dave G at the Original Oak in Headingley. Pete's first experience of the Headingley pubs!

Dave G has really enjoyed his stay in Leeds and has done nothing but drink since the start of the course. His only task this afternoon was to bring a tin of tomato juice to the boil on a gas oven.

We came back to the Shoulder of Mutton and met Chippy, Gus, Dave Wainwright, Neil Addyman and Frank Hall (who used to reside on Hawksworth Lane), and others. Chippy is taking on the personality of one of his mental patients, but Gus was his usual good~natured self. I was slightly pissed and at 10:30 we all went to Oakwood Hall until some very late hour.

I don't remember it but I am told I assaulted Chippy and knocked a lens out of his spectacles. Oh dear.

Pete took Dave G back to Leeds. Yes, I was pissed and don't mind admitting it. Sat reading Evelyn Waugh until the light of dawn was seeping through the curtains.

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Wednesday September 13, 1978

Donald Best got a lift with me and Jim this morning. He says the appointment of the Queen Mother as Lord Warden of the Cinque Ports is a ridiculous idea, and that Edward Heath, a Kentish man, with naval associations, would have been a more appropriate appointment. I cannot disagree more. The dear old Queen Mother will carry out the ceremonial like no one else. Donald is always very sarcastic about the Royal Family.

At 1pm I met Dave near the Poly and we walked across town to the Hofbräuhaus, where some of the lads from his course were assembled. It is a dark, smoke~filled cavern, full of people eating pork pies and mushy peas. We sat on the heavy trestle tables supping soapy ale from large jugs, and then it happened. Yes, on came the stripper. Yes, I know you are shocked and horrified, nay stunned, by this gross act of sexual perversion on my part, but that's what dissipated youngsters are doing these days. She wasn't much good and her dancing was moderate but what can you expect for 10p each? I will never listen to T-Connection again without breaking out into a cold sweat...... not.


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Tuesday September 12, 1978

Sunny day. Busy at the YP. Howled with laughter this morning when Michael Brown, the Religious affairs correspondent, phoned me from Huddersfield to tell me he thinks the new Pope (John Paul I) looks very much like Peter Sellers. A preposterous remark, or so I thought, but on inspecting the photo files I see the resemblance is remarkable.

I can see that before very long I'm going to become quite sick of our grinning, circus-like performer of a pontiff.

Other news: The Queen Mother is to become the next Lord Warden of the Cinque Ports. She'll become the first woman to hold the office, an ancient one, whch dates back to the time of King Harold. Previous Lord Wardens include Churchill and Sir Robert Menzies. Just what the job entails escapes me. I'm sure it will be nothing strenuous.

A photo of Lynn and Dave appeared in the EP. I'm going to miss Lynn, you know. Just look at the photo and that brilliant, glowing smile.

I met Jacq at lunchtime and we ate like horses in the park instead of our usual damp luncheon at the Ostlers. She says she may be 'buggering off' from Leeds. _________________.

Dave G and I met later near the Polytechnic and went for a drink at the Fenton, where the National Front and homosexual intellectuals gather to discuss tactics. He's having a riot in Leeds and last night ended up in the Original Oak with a sun~tanned lady just back from a holiday in Ibiza.

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Monday September 11, 1978

Auntie Eleanor is 51 today, and my cousin Marlene is 33.

Took Dave G to Leeds and he went off in search of the K block at the Polytechnic where he starts a week's catering course dealing with special diets.

Back to the YP and down to earth after the high of the wedding. Mum and Dad came to the office this afternoon with a proof of Lynn & Dave from the photographer Bryan Waite. I handed it over to Fred Willis, who says he'll get it in tomorrow's EP.

Dad says he took some floral displays to the Yorkshire Bank in Guiseley this afternoon. Just how creepy can you possibly get? Just imagine the manager, 'Tammy Wynette' Osborne, dancing among his bank notes with garlands of orchids and gladioli festooned everywhere. Nauseating.

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Sunday September 10, 1978

Moon's first quarter 04:20

16th after Trinity

A day made very amusing my the presence of dear Auntie Eddy. We were all very much hungover at breakfast and Eddy (Jadwega, of course) brightened things up with her wonderful Polish banter. She told Susan that yesterday she had looked 'radiating' in her bridesmaid garb.

Alison was dreadfully pale, and John P said he was close to death. Lynn and Dave arrived at about 11 to say goodbye and Eddy almost had Dave upstairs for a massage but he fought her off successfully. Audrey Baker fell victim here and was taken upstairs for the full works. Eddy advised Henry on his vitamin B intake. John came in to bid them farewell and then off he went back to Maria and JPH and they left for Stranraer.

Richard & Mandy B arrived and took them off to East Midlands Airport and they flew to Ibiza at 3pm. Alison and John P went with them. Lunch with Mum, Dad, Jacq, Bert, Eddy and Reggie. We had fish and chips from Harry Ramsden's, but first we collected all the floral displays from St Paul's church. The old hag of a caretaker went on and on about the mess Delia had made on Friday.

After lunch we fell into the lounge. It's a tremendous anti~climax. Bert, Eddy and Reggie went to Leeds at 5pm for the coach home to Nottingham and we watched TV. Keith Michell playng Henry VIII in the 1972 film.

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Saturday September 9, 1978

Sun rises 06:25 Sun sets 19:30

A dull, dismal day, with the occasional damp patch. Lynn and David's wedding day. She was divine, beaming and beautiful. Even my nerves were bad this morning, and the number of people in the house, and all the excitement didn't help matters. The wedding was soon upon us. Lynn dressed in white saying goodbye as Miss Rhodes. Dad was very pale. We found a whisky bottle.

Dad was close to tears as he took Lynn on his arm down the aisle, and when he witnessed the marriage after the ceremony he signed one of the certificates incorrectly and the Reverend Mr Ward had to tear a page from his register in front of the entire congregation. Auntie Mabel told Mum that Dad had wept as he walked down the aisle, but this is a slight exaggeration. The ceremony was moving, the reception excellent. Uncle H(arry) never arrived ~ which is just as well.

The only mishap of the day was that the DJ was two hours late and the disco didn't start until 9 o'clock. I mixed with most of the guests. I discussed women with Uncle Peter and chatted about Evelyn Waugh and satire with Uncle Bert. Frank (Harwood) measured me for a new suit in the middle of the dance floor ~ and that will set me back £20, or so. (These suits fall off a lorry in the vicinity of Burton's).

John and Maria brought Jacq and I back to Pine Tops at 12 and we mucked around in the dining room for hours. Dave had carried Lynn from the dance floor up to a room at the hotel and my little sister was gone forever. Things will never be the same again.

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Friday September 8, 1978

Busy day. I spent the afternoon at Esholt church with Sarah and Delia watching them arrange flowers, and came with them back to Pine Tops, laden with flowers, to decorate the house for Mama. They did the church wonderfully.

At 2pm John Pinder and I escaped to the Commercial - just for one drink. John was a bit over powered by Delia, who was going on about Lord Valentine Thynne and her recent experiences with Lord Bath at Longleat. It was just too much for him.

Mum was suffering all day after her barley wine session last night. Sue was feeling ill this evening. Her ear piercings from a few weeks ago have gone wrong.

Uncle Bert and Aunt Jadwega arrived with Cousin Reggie. Dave of Stockport closely followed. We laughed and joked. Jacq arrived bearing a bowl of jelly beans for Lynn and Dave B too put in an appearance but was sent home before midnight of course. We sat in the lounge buried beneath continental quilts ~ the house was so cold to preserve Mama's floral displays.

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