Saturday April 2, 1983

 We woke after 10 both feeling groggy. I went out to the Co-op and bought butter and sugar. It wasn't until I was sauntering past the frozen peas that I discovered an icy draught blowing through my open flies. I must have given some morning shoppers a rude awakening.  We had our glass-free Hot Cross Buns and guzzled tea. I went out and hung out the washing as Ally splashed in her bath. I think that perhaps we have slipped up this Easter. We should have avoided the boring, mundane routine today. We went to town to buy something for Frances who is two on Wednesday. Two hours in revolting toy shops full of plastic junk on sale at exhorbitant prices. Eventually we bought some pink shorts and a little shirt to match.

Later, at home, we had salad sandwiches and watched 'Raid on Entebbe'. In fact we didn't move fom the TV all night. I shoved a breast of lamb in the oven with some potatoes. Watched John Alderton in one of those boring vet films.

It is a year since the Argentinians invaded the Falklands. I do miss Ian MacDonald's MOD broadcasts.

I have an Easter Card from my great-auntie Annie (Kirk), and she is 'ever so pleased' that I 'have had Grandma and Grandad framed'. Very amusing. Sounds like some despicable conspiracy. Watched another Woody Allen film but dropped off before the end and woke up to see Rod Stewart leaping around encased in tin foil like a Christmas turkey. To bed.

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Friday April 1, 1983

 The first day of April. The year is flying. Sunshine but cold. Up at 6:44. I dislike having a day off when Ally has to work, but I suppose I will have to get used to it. Off to the AHA she went in her tight jeans and green boots looking dishy. She got a lift with Les Hotchin.

 I made Hot Cross buns but smashed the [illegible] bowl showering the room with jagged glass and dough. I closely inspected the buns and found no shards of glass and thought it safe to bake them. Splashed in the bath and went out at 11:45 to meet Ally. I walked down as far as the pet shop and then got a bus to scale the heights of Squire Lane. I arrived at Chestnut House and found Ally keeping vigil at a window. She laughed because I was wearing a tie. We walked hand in hand to the Queen on Daisy Hill Bank, a Webster's house, where we spent two hours and a small fortune. I consumed five pints of bitter. The place is full of paintings by Stuart Hirst, son of the landlord. We had cheese and onion sandwiches and sat watching the other customers. It is most definitely the life for us. We went back to Chestnut House at 2:15 and I sat with until 4. John MacCabe came to inspect me as I sat typing on Patricia's electric typewriter, and then I helped Gillian make the tea. She didn't believe me when I told her I was 'retiring'. _______. We came home for 4:30 after phoning Lynn and David to see if we could go over and probably babysit for them. They didn't take us up on our suggestion. Lynn is obsessed with having babies and wants nothing in between. __________. We phoned Mum too. They had five men in last night and are having four tonight, who are also having dinner too. John called on them this morning on his way to Scotland with the offering of a dead rabbit which he's killed on the way up. Janette, who is working at Easter, is occupying the flat quite alone. Ally doesn't want to go to Horton if it's swarming with hikers, but I don't think it will ever become quieter. It's the walking season. 

Later we had a liver and onion special and collapsed. Ally, feeling fragile, snoozed in my arms and went up to bed at 9. I stayed up until 12:30 and watched Woody Allen's 'Love & Death' - always worth seeing. To bed.

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Thursday March 31, 1983

 We were up eating bananas on toast and watching Breakfast TV. We switched around from the BBC to TV-am. All very trivial and boring. Intrigue at the YP. I keep emreging from behind the filing cabinets to find Sarah and Margo whispering. Later I saw Geoff and Bob in a corner with Kathleen, obviously discussing me. I am paranoid. I gave Geoff some material on tigers. He says you can keep a tiger at home by following the entry for tigers in the 1955 Encyclopaedia Britannica. Sarah left at 4.

I have an apology to make. Baroness Willoughby de Eresby is 27th holder of the peerage, not the 28th. The co-heirs to the peerage are her elderly aunts. I would like either to be a peerage lawyer or a publican. Not much difference really. One pulls peers and the other pulls beers.

I phoned Ally. She is miserable because she cannot take tomorrow off because Jean is. She went off at 5 for a trim and looked deliciously sweet tonight.  I bought her a chocolate egg for £1.99 and a sloppy Easter card. She deserves every bit of romantic clobber I can muster. I hid the egg on top of the wardrobe. 

I got in at 6 and made bacon and eggs whilst Ally made herself pretty in pink trousers and white top. She is feeling delicate _________. We cuddled up and watched 'Top of the Pops' and Kenny Everett. Up to bed at 10. Before dropping off Ally remembered that it's April Fool's Day tomorrow and wants to to do something appropriate. I'll ring Mum and tell her that the council have given approval to build an ASDA on the top of Pen-y-ghent.

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Wednesday March 30, 1983

 Scurry off to the YP full of glee. Saw Geoff. He gave me my application forms with additional flowing script.He must think I'm the bees knees. I am very flattered that he has taken such an interest in my future life. Kathleen asked if he is 'pushing me'. What can she mean? Told Sarah about my plans and she was pleasant. I think Kathleen had given her some idea.  I collected my £67.05 because it is Easter. Marched through Leeds this lunch time and sat in Park Square - probably for the last time. My God, what hours of solitary reflection have I spent in that peaceful liitle haven. The pigeons will miss me. 

Saw in The Times that Lady Jane Fellowes has had a son, Alexander, on March 23. A first nephew for the Princess of Wales. Lady Sarah McCorquodale expects in July. Viscount Head is dead. That would be a good opening line for an epitaph. The Earl of Ancaster has gone too. His daughter becomes the 28th Baroness Willoughby de Eresby. I would like to master the laws relating to (peerage) abeyance.

Home to Pig. She was unhappy at first with Geoff's re-wording, but after reading them a few times accepts his version. She didn't approve of his tatty typing.

Chicken and mushroom pie at 7:30. Jim, Margaret and Julie came for half an hour to collect a carpet knife. They inspected the kitchen closely. Watched Dallas and went to bed at 10.

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Tuesday March 29, 1983

 Wet. a daffodil is trying to flower in the garden. I have been watching it's progress with interest. (Hot Cross) buns for breakfast again. Ally spilled tea on her skirt and had to go change. 

At the YP I gave Geoff my application forms and he went away saying he will look at them tonight. Derek Foster says he will have to start looking at the births, marriages and deaths after my departure.

Told the EP that Sir William Brooksbank is dead. They did it this evening.

I felt the absence of Carol J today and shudder to think how the department will run with only three staff. People keep coming in and going away puzzled ats to what will be the procedure after April 8. I told an EP reporter that the place is going self service, with wire baskets and Johnny Mathis tapes playing on a loop only to be interrupted occasionally by an adenoidal announcement: 'Mr Hawkins to the cash desk please'.

Sarah probably won't get to my leaving party. Anne Goodyear, Michael Brown and Penny Wark look like certainties. Kathleen is panic stricken and scurries here and there. Home at 5:30. I hung around on Wellington Street for half an hour. Chicken again. We laid on the settee all night. A science fiction film. The Martians came, but they all caught cold and died. Silly.

Saw Sir Laurens van der Post interview the PM at No 10. What a remarkable woman she is. I find her very inspiring. 

Dave G phoned. He says Billy requires psychiatric treatment. I told him it's his age.

To bed at 11:44pm.

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Monday March 28, 1983

 Full Moon

Sweet Auntie Hilda celebrates another birthday. We sent her a cheeky card which I think will put a few naughty words into auntie's 47 year-old mouth. 

Ally and I had hot cross buns for breakfast. She is happy today because Derek (Jenkins) is basking in Torremolinos. Why a man in his exalted position wishes to holiday in Torremolinos is a mystery. He is a district works officer you know. 

Off to the YP where I learn that today is not my eighth last day, but my seventh. Sarah and I are having it off on Good Friday.

Just Margo and I in. Saw Geoff Hemingway, who says he will take down my particulars tomorrow. Phoned Mum. They had another walking couple in for B & B. We argued about  the identity of 'Philip Ashley' in the 1952 film 'My Cousin Rachel'. I told her Richard Burton played the part opposite Olivia de Havilland's 'Rachel' (sic). She swore blind it was Kieran Moore.

Ally and I have yet to decide what we are doing at Easter. She doesn't want to spend the whole of the break at Horton.

Tonight we had roast chicken. Afterwards I typed application forms to Tetley's and Samuel Smith's breweries. Made a good job of them too. Ally's typing is abysmal on my machine. Saw 'Coronation Street' and 'Brass'. Mike Baldwin wants to build a discotheque in Rosamund Street. Annie Walker will be livid.

Royal News: The Prince and Princess of Wales dancing at a charity ball in Sydney. They moved excellently. Diana has really captured the impressionable little Aussies. 

David L phoned to see if we fancied a rock concert on Wednesday. I didn't recognise the group and so said no. A pleasant chat.

De Haviland has only one L.

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Sunday March 27, 1983

 Palm Sunday

We were awake at about 10 o'clock and Ally got up first and I lay watching her dress. She was in her tight jeans and white shirt. Her hair isn't as curly as it has been recently. I had two kippers for breakfast washed down with tea. Ally marvels at my capacity for fish, and takes me for something of an expert in removing bones. She ironed afterwards. Believe it or not, I made 12 Hot Cross buns and a gallon of apple wine. We had a phone call from Susie and they arrived at 2 o'clock. We had a drink. We also forgot to alter the clocks to British Summer Time. This threw us for the remainder of the day. Christopher wasn't quite as boisterous as usual and he beamed like the devil when he saw the piano. We have never thought to show the piano to a baby before. He banged away merrily. Sue looked really well and put away some red wine. They left at 4 to visit Pamela. It's Pamela and Peter's wedding anniversary and they are going to the Damn Yankee tonight. We ate Hot Cross buns at 5. Fish pie at 7. Saw a film about the Berlin Wall. Bed after the news. The royal progress of Australia puts back any talk of a republic until 2167.

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