Sunday September 5, 1976

12th after Trinity. Out of bed at midday for a cooked breakfast with the Mather family [except Donald, who is decorating]. Horror of Horrors! I smashed a rare Meissen plate when I dropped a half-ton butter dish onto it. Mrs M laughs it off but I feel terrible. I never break anything at home. I also accidentally knocked Peter's electric razor off a dresser, showering particles & bristles all over the kitchen.

Lynne and I then creep away to the Cayley Arms. Talk about things. We don't like Jane, and neither does Donald & Vera. I say how much I like her parents - which isn't crawling - but quite sincere. Only us in the pub, which isn't very nice, and so we go for a drive round for an hour or so. Bright sun. We laugh at the sight of a massive 18 stone woman astride a tiny, pathetic, crippled pony, which seems to be dying beneath the weight. Lynne wants to contact the NSPCC or something. Isn't that for cats?

Back to Ty-Onnen for hilarious lunch and then settle down to watch 'Cromwell' starring Richard Harris and with Alec Guinness as the martyred monarch. Retire to bed at midnight after cuccumber sandwiches and Tchaikovsky's 'Swan Lake' on the record player. Listening to Lynne and her father discussing work over supper I realise how terribly ambitious she is. I don't like ambition one bit. I tend to think people become eaten away by it and finish up like Hitler.

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Saturday September 4, 1976

To Castle Howard with Lynne, Peter & Jane. We set off in Pete's van but he broke down near Kirkbymoorside, and struggled home and set off again this time in Donald M's car. L and I have a great giggle. However, I've seen nicer stately homes. Too many marble busts and long, empty corridors. The grounds are great though, and the two of us walked round eating liquorice & making fools of ourselves. Peter and Jane seem besotted. Lynne cannot get over it. She's never seen Peter so taken before. What he sees in the girl God only knows. She's 17 but has the brain of a backward 6 year-old, is flat-chested [not even nicely flat chested as some ladies are], and very pale. Ugh. Come on, Peter Baby! Pull yourself together!

Out tonight to Tiffany's at Scarborough until 2am. A good, enjoyable evening. In fact the weekend's been far better than I thought it would be. My only worry was that it might coincide with John & Maria's 'big' event, but so far so good.

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Friday September 3, 1976

Lynne comes at 7 and after a few sandwiches we go up to Bramhope to collect David __[surname held back], a weedy 13 year-old friend of Karl, and brother of Jane, Peter M's girlfriend.

Arrive at Thornton-le-Dale at about 9 o'clock and go to both pubs in the village with Lynne, Peter & Jane. I don't like Jane. A 17-year-old 'know all' who in fact knows absolutely nothing when it boils down to it. Back to Ty-Onnen [the Mather residence] at 11 o'clock with King Edward cigars and a couple of quids worth of beer. Also have two bottles of wine awaiting our consumption. Lynne and I get a bit pissed, but the others look sober. They all seem to enjoy themselves anyway. When everyone else had drifted off to bed only Lynne and I were left [obviously], and we proceeded to drink even more. I'm taking photographs like a regular little Lord Snowdon. Don't ask me what time our orgy of fun finally fell through, but I'm quite sure it was virtually dawn. Lynne is a beaut. People however are saying nasty things about us. "That Mig Rhodes only goes out with Lynne Mather because she looks like Princess Anne." To those misguided souls, whomsoever they are, here is my message: "Drop Dead, Tosh."

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Thursday September 2, 1976

To Oakwood Hall at 8.30pm with Lynne. Stay until nearly midnight. Had a few drinks. Had the occasional dance. Had a great time. Need I say more?

Oh yes. Posted a Silver Wedding card to Mr & Mrs Mather for tomorrow and dropped a line to CB in Blackburn, but after I'd done this she rang me for a chat. I tell her that Tony is thinking of ringing her to see if she's doing anything on Saturday night. She is startled because she hardly knows him, but says she's coming home anyway. I can't get over what she said to me the other weekend. _________.

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Wednesday September 1, 1976

To W.H. Smith's straight from work and hang about chatting to Denise until Tony finishes at 5.00. She isn't all that friendly and gives me strange looks. _______.

Back to [Tony's] flat and have chops, spuds and peas for tea. Tony is in high spirits and jives around in the kitchen like a regular little Fanny Cradock. Go to the cinema at 7 to see 'Shout at the Devil' starring Roger Moore and Lee Marvin. Very good.

Home at 12.30 after coffee at the flat. Bring home a biography of the Beatles with me and read it sitting propped up in bed. Quite a remarkable story really - especially when you see what backgrounds they came from.

Mum and Dad not speaking at all tonight. Papa must be over-working. His treatment of Mama last night is unjustifiable & insane.

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Tuesday August 31, 1976

Mum and Dad had a terrible row this evening. He wants to go out for a drink but she is still feeling too ill [with her back]. So he goes off on his own leaving Mum crying, and Lynn [for some reason] virtually hysterical. Is it a full moon tonight, or something? If so it will answer the question about Daddy and his sanity. I think I'll change my name to Wilson. And that's not after, or in honour of, Sir Harold either.

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Monday August 30, 1976

Bank Holiday in England, N.Ireland & Wales. Out for a drink with Tony. He comes up at 8 o'clock and we go to The Drop in Guiseley until closing time. Discuss the usual subject: 'Miss Akroyd & the Details [Once Again] of the Collapse of Her Entanglement with Anthony Brotherwood, Esquire'.

It's three years since I had a nasty verbal exchange with the fat, wholesome landlady of the Drop [Mrs Hanson], and although I vowed never to darken the doorstep of that place again, I have been in a few times since.

Tony comes home for a coffee and we watch part of the revolting Edinburgh Tattoo on the BBC. The sooner Scotland is granted its independence the better. Why should the United Kingdom continue to be associated with such a far-flung, bleak, and pagan nation? [Just a joke, mate. Some of best friends are Scots].

List of Nice Scottish people:

Sir Harry Lauder
Dame Flora Robson
The Queen Mother
Flora MacDonald
Hugh Fraser, MP
The Earl of Dalkeith
Moira Anderson
Andy Stewart
Mary, Queen of Scots
Sir Iain Moncrieffe of that Ilk
The Duke of Rothesay
Billy Connolly
Lord Lovat
Rupert Murdoch........

Rupert Murdoch?

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Sunday August 29, 1976

11th after Trinity. CB stayed the night at Pine Tops and we entertained her to luncheon. Mum remained in bed throughout and I received some icy looks from her on the few occasions I ventured into her [bed]room to see her. I don't think she approves of me entertaining young ladies when Lynne is away. Am I married? Am I a bachelor?

Carole was at the Stoney Lea last night with her new found friend, Naomi [Downing]. CB had a bit of a chat with her, and so did Tony. I think she fully expects to get back with me one day.

Straight after lunch we drop CB off in Guiseley and Dad and I go back to Silverdale Dr to do some decorating for John & Maria. Stay until 7.30 and do the hall and staircase a green colour.

At home I fall into a coma at about 10.30 and miss the end of a thrilling episode of 'The Avengers'. Stagger up to bed and into a deep sleep.

Saturday August 28, 1976

Up at 8.30am!! Planned to see CB but changed my mind over a cup of tea. Go up to see Mama, and she sends me to Dr Ludlow to get some tablets for her pathetic back [ache]. I also go to the library and get a pile of books to entertain her while she's bedridden.

Home at 12.30 and go straight out again. This time with Dad to Morrison's. Do the week's shopping and after lunch the two of us go down to 69 Silverdale Dr where we get on with the decorating. I rub down and sandpaper the lounge window and undercoat it. John comes in just as we are leaving to inspect our efforts. He stands around like the 1st Duke of Marlborough watching the progress of the building of Blenheim Palace.

Home at 7o'clock and after a hurried bath I go down to the Hare with Lynn & David. Lynn sitting on my knee in the [Triumph] Spitfire. See Judith and Kathryn and they have people in stitches with their quick flowing repartee and humorous chit-chat. CB and I go into the tap room and ring to book a taxi to collect us from the 'Upstairs, Downstairs' disco at the Stoney Lea. She gets pissed and tells me that she wants to go to bed with me. She always says that when I'm involved with another woman.

Tony and his 'latest' [girl] from Hertfordshire come in to the Hare at 10 o'clock, and they take CB, Carol Smith and me to the British Legion in Ilkley where we pass a hysterical hour waiting for Martyn. Up to the Stoney Lea at midnight with Martyn, CB and Carol S in a taxi, and don't remember all that much about the next couple of hours. CB and I are together all the time, and I feel revoltingly guilty, deceitful and unpleasant. I bet Lynn and Dave have something to say in the morning because I had the distinct feeling that disaproving glances were coming my way.

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Friday August 27, 1976

Mum is bedridden with her back. I don't like being at home when a member of the family is ill. I have a pathological hatred of poorly people. I'd walk round Lourdes slapping cripples.

Poor Molly Macdonald is at death's door. John told Dad today that she burst a blood vessel in her arm yesterday evening and a doctor told Jim [Macdonald] that 'she could go at any minute.'

Sarah told me today that she and Peter [Baker] have finished. Pity really because he was quite a good laugh, but at least I stand a chance once again. Oh, I might have been going out with Lynne M since June, but that devilment still exists. You can't keep a good man down.

Out with Lynne at 8 o'clock to the Hare. A dead, miserable hole it is too. Sit with Sue and Peter all night, and then David L and the delectable CB arrive at 10 o'clock. Whenever she's around I go wild with exuberence and excitement and our eyes seldom drift from each other for long. Why is this? Is it cruel to Lynne? Do I really think anything at all of Lynne? What the Hell have I been doing since the beginning of June? Oh God. Have I been leading L down the garden path? After Carole, will I ever have a normal affair again? [I'm not offering any apologies for all these questions because you lot have nothing better to do than to attempt to answer them, anyway.]

Home at midnight and Lynne goes off to Bramhope to collect Karl from a party and they drive to Thornton-le-Dale. Won't see her now until next week.

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Thursday August 26, 1976

I've committed a ghastly crime. After 21 years as a law abiding member of society I have now fallen into the abyss of degradation and sin. What has this man done to to place him in eternal damnation, you are all asking? At 11.20pm last night I, Michael Rhodes, did wilfully and knowingly drink a glass of WATER. Yes, I know you cannot find the words to describe this diabolical action. Sorry everyone. I'll never do it again. It's not as if I like water anyway.

Latest DROUGHT News: The Thames is now non-existant. Evidently it dried up in the early hours of the morning, and there's nothing Mr Callaghan, or anyone else for that matter, who can do anything about it. The elephants at London Zoo are having to bathe in dirty, used water - poor things.

Lynne comes up at 7.30 and we watch 'Top of the Pops' with Mum. At 8 o'clock we go to the Hare where we have some revolting cider which virtually cripples us. Lynn had crippling pains in her abdomen, and the fish and chips in Otley didn't help matters. We go on to the Black Bull [Otley], but after half an hour she still feels off it. We come back to Pine Tops for coffee and look at the photo albums. Lynne shows Mum Peter's [21st birthday] party pictures. Hear that CB rang te ask if I'm going to Thornton-Le-Dale on Friday. I'm not going this weekend, but the weekend after. I'm working on Bank Holiday Monday.

Dave L goes to Gloucester next week & so on Saturday night it will have to be a 'do' at Oakwood Hall. No Lynne there of course, but no doubt I'll get by. I love freedom occasionally.

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