Friday November 3, 1978

Dear God I feel just terrible. To quote Sir Henry Campbell-Bannerman ~ "my eyes are like piss holes in the snow". Hideous, quite hideous.

Did little or no work and Sarah took me to Len's Bar at lunch in an attempt to revive me but it simply failed to work.

Didn't hear from Christine. I bet she feels the same.

At 5:30 Jacq and I went with Dave B to meet Lynn at Yeadon. We had every intention of going to see 'Grease'. At 6:30 after fish and chips we 'nipped' into the Clothiers 'just for a quick one' where we were joined by Sue and Pete, who put us off by telling us that the queue for the film at the Odeon is five miles long. We too readily believed them, and carried on drinking. It was a great relief for me. I can think of nothing worse than John Travolta's leather gear in glorious technicolour.

The six of us moved on the the Crown, and then the Drop. All quite pissed up. ______________________.

Pete says he's going to blackmail me over _________________________.

Jacq got a bus at about 11 and the others called in at Pine Tops to see Mum and Dad. Dave and I were hideously pissed, and this always niggles Mummy when she's stone cold sober. We squabbled slightly and I argued with Dad about the Labour party and nationalisation. David joined in the argument but nobody could understand what he was talking about.

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Thursday November 2, 1978

To town with Sarah at lunchtime. To Boots - we took a couple of negatives of photos of Lynn and Dave's engagement in Oct 1977. Really good pics.

Tonight Christine came at 8 and we went to Otley to collect her 30~year~old blond friend, Doreen. She's straight~forward, crude, blunt, in fact just like us.

We went to the Shoulder of Mutton. Saw Pete N who told us he isn't going to Oakwood Hall. We don't let this trouble us. I was well away after only three or four pints. On to the White Cross where Doreen picked up a young, bearded garage proprietor, who really got on my nerves. Then, after seeing Jimmy Macdonald, but only briefly, we went to the wretched Fox & Hounds. Naomi was in, but no darling Carole. Philip 'Birdgarden' Houldsworth and little Gary were chatting up Christine, and at 10:30 Doreen and 'Howard Hughes II' cleared off. Her excuse was that she is too old for Oakwood Hall. She must be mad.

My recollections now grow quite faint. I do remember accidentally dropping a half pint of lager down a debutante's cleavage, and Christine later said I sat in a pint of cider that was on the dance floor.

Evidently, at about 1:30 I bought a hot curry from the man in the van outside Oakwood Hall. I cried all the way through it. Oozing snot. I almost said hot as 'Dante's Inferno' but a few years ago somebody told me that Dante's Inferno has nothing whatsoever to do with fire or heat. I'm in the dark on this really.

At home I pelted Christine with 2lb of onions and forced elderflower champagne down her throat.

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Wednesday November 1, 1978

All Saints

Sarah and I went to the Red Lion in Burley this evening and then on to Lynn and Dave's where we watched tv ~ Lesley Anne Down's portrayal of Phyllis Dixey, the stripper.

Sarah wasn't feeling too well and was very pale and tired. I sampled 'Arctic Lite' lager ~ not for me. Too dry. Dave and I dashed back over to the Red Lion at 9:30 to get a few more bottles and I paid for the lot. I am really enjoying my new~found wealth.

David seems to like Sarah. _______________________.

Sarah and I got the 11:30 bus. Squabbled with Motherdear about something ~ I've forgotten what. Retired to bed.

Jacq and I have got seats in the stand on Nov 11 for the Lord Mayor of London's parade at the Mansion House in London. The old boy, Sir Kenneth Cork, is an old mate of Derek Sate's, I think. __________.

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Tuesday October 31, 1978

New Moon 20:06

I bumped into Jacq on Wellington Street this morning ______________. Isn't it supposed to be All Hallows Eve today? Years ago, the four of us, would dash out into the night with lanterns made from scooped~out turnips and proceed to terrorise the neighbourhood. Dear reader, those were the days.

Christine phoned to say that the letter I wrote to her whilst intoxicated on Thursday night is an absolute scream. Evidently, I told her in no uncertain terms that she had to accompany me to Oakwood Hall on Thursday or that I would take it very personally. I then went on to make a cartoon sketch, in red ink, of Mr Jess Yates. I must be a raving lunatic. CB did a good deal of giggling.

Sarah has been her sensuous, tantalising self all day. She has that wondrous, sexy Scorpio personality ~ so sexy. We are going out tomorrow. ______________________.

Tonight watched an interesting programme on BBC2 about the voyage of Charles Darwin on HMS Beagle in the 1830s. It was actually part one of a series. All good stuff though.

Peter and Sue have been playing 'Monopoly'. Susan has had a very poor game ~ in fact she's bankrupt. We Rhodeses have never been financial whiz kids ~ just horribly attractive people.

_=_

Monday October 30, 1978

At work Jacq phoned and wanted to know how to spell 'horrendous'. Is she perhaps writing about our relationship?

I phoned Christine and told her that she must come to Oakwood Hall on Thursday. She agreed, but I always live in fear of a cancellation because her social diary is very packed and running wild these days. She told me she was out with Philip Knowles on Friday. Bless them. We remarked how long it was since we were last out together ~ just the two of us. It will be a good laugh if Gus and Co join us at Oakwood because they go insane with typical 20~year~old spasms at the sight of anything remotely female, and Christine is certainly very, very female.

To be honest I'm feeling miserable.Every once in a while I go through a phase of critical re~assessment and sit pondering on why we are here. The human race that is. Come on, who would care if Michael Lawrence Rhodes was swallowed up by some over~active peat bog on All Hallows' Eve, 1978? My dear old Mum would probably notice I'd gone, but ex~President Podgorny of the U.S.S.R and Dame Anna Neagle wouldn't give a damn.

Saw Monty Python tonight ~ a repeat of the 1969 series, but good all the same. Afterwards watched Spike Milligan's 'Adolf Hitler: My Part in his Downfall'. Spike only made a brief appearance which was sad. At 11pm I sloped off to bed.

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Sunday October 29, 1978

23rd Sunday after Trinity

9th Sunday before Christmas

End of Summer Time: put clocks back one hour at 02:00

Sarah and I talked last night. We are in a very similar position. ______________________. We are two of a kind Sarah and I. We do think one hell of a lot about each other. She told me that she didn't think she would ever marry.

Jacq came at 12. We went with Sue and Pete to the Commercial for beer and beef sandwiches, and then moved on to the Half Way House (opposite the Shoulder of Mutton) which is a ghastly modern pub full of adolescents and with a grotesque barmaid.

Back home for 2:30 and we settled in front of the tv. Horribly boring. Jacq sat knitting. __________________.

The Prince of Wales is in Yugoslavia on his first visit to a communist country.

Mum and Dad returned from Whitby at 6. We all had a Chinese take~away. Watched 'Lillie Langtry' again. It's not the greatest historical drama ever made. The woman playing Queen Victoria should be horse whipped.

Took Jacq to her bus at 9:30. To bed at 11:30.

Saturday October 28, 1978

Sun rises 07:46 Sun sets 17:42

St Simon & St Jude

Lynn and Dave are consoling Alison today. She should have been marrying at 2pm.

Mum and Dad went off early this morning to Whitby. They are spending the night at the pub overlooking the harbour. I sat at home all day quite alone. _______________________.

At 6:30 I went over to Sarah's and we moved on to Carol's flat and eventually at 7:30 we went to Headingley to meet Jacq. She said she wouldn't arrive until 8 and so I told Sarah and Carol to go on ahead to the Damn Yankee. _________. Jacq didn't eventually come until 8:30 and so we didn't get to the Regent until about 9. The four of us stood in the Regent like wet fish. Sarah went to sit in the car at ten because she said she was feeling faint. Carol went off with Roy _______________________.

We dropped Jacq off at 10:30 and then Sarah made a miraculous recovery and we returned to Pine Tops and played records, drank lager and elderflower champagne until about 2. We danced the tango across the dining room to Donna Summer ~ Sarah with a large plastic flower clasped firmly between her teeth. Hilarious.

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Friday October 27, 1978

My day off free from the drudgery of the YP. I was eating kippers for breakfast when Jacq arrived. My head was throbbing and I could think of nothing worse than having to trail to Haworth for this long promised days outing. The delights of Bronte land are not well placed on the bus routes and all I can put it down to is that perhaps the West Yorkshire Passenger Transport Executive is not impressed by the likes of 'Vilette' and 'The Tenant of Wildfell Hall'.

We arrived there at 12 and went straight to the Black Bull. I was in no mood for boozing. The Black Bull was, of course, often frequented by Branston Bronte, whose sole claim to fame was his invention of Branston chutney.

We pondered as to whether a pissed Charlotte Bronte staggered across this same old stone floor back in the 1850s. At 2:30 we swapped to the King's Arms and then took the air on Haworth Moor, which neither of us found impressive. Ugly in fact. What startled me was the sunshine as it always seems to piss down in Haworth.

At tea time we journeyed home and then went to Salvo's in Headingley for seafood pizzas. Shear greed really because neither of us were hungry. At about 9 we moved on to the Central, for the loud, pulsating disco. John Travolta imitators were gyrating everywhere. We both felt quite sick, bloated and uncomfortable. Drank rum and orange. Home at 11 on a large, red bus.

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Thursday October 26, 1978

Carole phoned. It was marvellous to hear from her because I have been worrying about reports about her health. She just wanted to know what I am getting up to and said it would be nice to bump into me. We talked about John and Maria and she said they should be at home in Yorkshire where they belong. Fogarty's name wasn't mentioned but she enquired whether Jacq was still on the scene. Her "swimming accident" on holiday was in fact a recurrence of last year's mysterious ailment. She has always been a strong swimmer.

Tonight went with Pete, Chippy, Gus, Frank, &c to the Shoulder (of Mutton), Menston Hospital Club, and then Oakwood Hall. The lads vowed never to return to Oakwood after the humiliation of three weeks ago, but there we went. I was pissed up on lager and cider. They all joked about ____________________.

Christine and I must do Oakwood next week. Home at 2am.

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Wednesday October 25, 1978

Excuse my scribbling in felt tipped pen. My bottle of scarlet ink is downstairs and I can't be bothered chasing after it.

I really do think that I am in love, yet again, with Sarah. The YP just wouldn't exist without her. Life would be a drag if I didn't see her every day. We plan to go to the Regent at Chapel Allerton on Saturday, and afterwards to a party, no doubt. _______________________________.


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Tuesday October 24, 1978

Moon's Last Quarter 01:34

United Nations Day (1945)

Wet, cold and windy. Climbed out of bed at 10am. Went with Mum and Dad to Morrison's to help with the grotesque shopping. Supermarkets are beastly dens. I wouldn't be at all surprised to learn that William Morrison is really Wilhelm von Moritzon, the SS chief and war criminal extraordinaire. Not even Adolf Hitler could have conjured up something quite so evil as a vast, music~filled chamber heavily laden with packets of breakfast cereal and cellophane~wrapped streaky bacon. Hideous.

To the YP twixt 5 and 12. Campbell Spray was sneering about Jacq. Miss Sate really is the limit encouraging C. Spray in this ridiculous fashion. I will not play Edward Langtry to her Lillie.

Home in a dull, uninteresting taxi at 12. Cheese on toast, Ovaltine and a pomegranate. Weird, yet pleasant. To bed at 1:32am. It took me 12 minutes to complete this page.

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