Monday November 29, 1976

Give Denise a ring to see how the travel business is going. She says that bookings for next year are going quite well and that we should decide whether we're going as soon as possible.

If you think that this diary has been getting boring lately just hang on a minute because I have a nice surprise for you all. I have decided that on Mondays I'll write a poem or ode [call it what you will] dealing with some event currently taking place. How's that for excitement? Today's ode is as follows:

Lines on the Earthquake in Turkey

Poor Turkey, what a damned shame,
your land has crumbled in all but name,
Your people starve, and your women weep,
But Michael Rhodes hasn't lost any sleep.


Will the Turkish people accept my apologies for the tasteless filth I've just had the audacity to churn out? I don't really mean it.

Home for tea and await the arrival of Miss Mather, who spoke to me on the telephone this morning. She's going [horse] riding on Sunday and wants to know if I want to accompany her. I say like Hell I will. However, we will be going to Thornton-le-Dale after Miss Carol Smith's 'do' at Skipton. No doubt we'll be going straight to work on Monday. Miserable existence really. Sometimes I don't know why the Hell I bother with this journal. Perhaps I should extend my poetic scribblings to Tuesdays, Wednesdays, Thursdays, Fridays, Saturdays and Sundays. That's how Keats started.

Tony rings at 8 to arrange a booze-up for tomorrow night. He says Stuart has got the Paris job. Great eh? No more weekends in Ilkley. It'll be: 'Oh, I'm nipping over to Paris, Mum.' Smashin'.

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Sunday November 28, 1976

Advent Sunday. Up at 12 o'clock and devour a piece of toast. The lads seem quite fresh except Martyn who still looks smashed. At 12.30 we go down to the Commercial and show the lads where 'Emmerdale Farm' is filmed. Dave and Glen really are a great couple of mates. Decide over a pint of Stella that I'm going to Ibiza next year whether Pete M or Chris want to or not. Back home for lunch at 2pm with a bottle of red wine. Afterwards we collapse in the lounge for a couple of hours. My head is terrible. The drink is taking it's toll. The lads leave [for Stockport] at about 6pm and we've decided top get more recruits for Ibiza and then they will bring over deposit money and we'll all book together.

Bed at midnight after squabbling with Mum. Since Martyn and Alison split up ________.The Poor lad's done nothing wrong, but she's pulling him to pieces. Nobody criticises my friends without a mouthful from me. It is one of my sore points I'm afraid.

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Saturday November 27, 1976

Go for a drive around Otley and Ilkley this afternoon with Sue & Peter. They are a pair, well-matched too, if ever I saw one. Nip into the Hare at 2.45 for a quick drink. Sue has a gin which she says is disgusting at this hour of the day. Pete doesn't half have her on, but she loves having her leg pulled and knows just how to answer. She is a shrewd and very sweet comedienne. Lynn is much too like me for comfort.

At 4 Dave and Glen arrive.It sure is great to see them for the first time in four months. They bring holiday photographs which are tremendous - much better than Peter's. The ones with Pam are exceptional. I take the negatives to get copies of my own. The lads soon settle down with Mum and Dad and Sue. [Lynn and Dave are at Alison's in Winchester]. We take them to Harry Ramsden's for tea. They had never heard of the place. Mum and Dad, Sue & Pete, Margaret & Jim Nason go off for a meal at 7 and us three lads mess about until 8 when we WALK TO THE HARE! Martyn joined us at nine o'clock. We attempted to get a taxi to Oakwood [Hall] at 11 but had no luck & so we went by bus to Ilkley and then got a taxi from there. Dave and Glen can't stop talking about the holiday. Martyn is eager to go back to Ibiza next year and doesn't think Peter & Chris would be adverse to the idea.

Get a bit pissed at Oakwood at meet a nice girl called Paulette who comes and sits with me because a band of marauding Pakistanis are after her. Her big friend amuses me no end. Martyn is with his tarty new friend he met at the Stoney Lea last night. The lads had a good laugh and we all came back to Pine Tops at 2.30 where we ate cheese on toast and sat up for a couple of hours.

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Friday November 26, 1976

In bed until 11.30 when I'm stirred from my slumbers by the soddin' butcher with Mama's meat order. Still, I've had a good few extra hours 'neath the sheets. Listen to the record player until lunchtime and then leap into a good hot bath. Something of great importance about next years holiday. Late last night I received a phone call from Dave in Stockport asking if he and Glen can come over tomorrow. Great news. They'll be here at 4pm and they hope to stay until Sunday. It certainly looks as though they'll be booking with us for 1977 and a holiday in San Antonio again. We can't go in early June of course because of the Silver Jubilee lark. What about David L too? Martyn, Peter and Chris are the other likely holidaymakers. [This] subject is not yet mentioned to Lynne, but no doubt she'll be too busy saving for her Renault, or whatever car it is, to be interested of my whereabouts in July. Anyway, summer is one hell of a long way off and you all know only too well what I'm like with women.

Work at 5pm. Not feeling too good. Hope it isn't salmonella food poisoning. Quiet night at the YP with no historic news coming in. Saddened however to read in one of the gossip columns that Sir Harold W[ilson] may well be quitting the Commons to go an lecture in Israel. Talk about deserting the sinking ship! Home at 11.30 and watch a revolting film on Rasputin. It's completely distorted and ridiculous. I think a Hammer film.

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Thursday November 25, 1976

Thanksgiving Day U.S.A. Busy at work again. Kathleen's 33rd birthday - what a horrible feeling that must be. Meet Dave B at the Ostlers for lunch and consume three pints of lager. He and Lynn are going to Alison's for the weekend and he tells me that the two of them are going away on holiday - in Britain - next summer. Is it wedding bells?

Lynne comes at 8 o'clock. She's getting on my bloody nerves lately and I feel that she's taking the piss all the time. She makes it obvious that she looks down on my family. Sneering at Lynn and laughing at Mum. She's forever criticising people and saying they are 'old fashioned' when she's just as bloody bad, if not worse. I can't stand much more of it. You may well be reading the diary of a single man by the New Year. Sorry about all this antagonistic chatter.

Down to the Hare & Hounds from 8.30 until 10 o'clock. Carole is in with [Peter] Fogarty and Lynne looks me straight in the eyes and says: "One day you two will get back together." I didn't bat an eye-lid.

Home at 11 and Lynne disappears over the horizon and God knows when I'll see her again.

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Wednesday November 24, 1976

Sarah says she thinks Peter [Baker] is a damned liar and can never trust him & that the whole relationship is on the rocks. Do you know why I am so content in that miserable dead-end hole, the [Yorkshire Post] library? I'll tell you. It's because of Sarah Elizabeth Collis. I'm sure I must love her. She is very much aware that I worship her. Funny, isn't it?

Tony rings tonight and enquires about my movements over the weekend. It's the first time I've heard from him since Saturday when he, Martyn and Stuart disappeared from Oakwood Hall at 1am or so. He says Stuart wasn't feeling too well and an emergency exit was necessary.

See the [British] Film Awards on TV. The Duchess of Kent actually went onto the stage and made a brief speech at the end of the show. An unusual move for royalty. They normally stand up, wave, and clear off.

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Tuesday November 23, 1976

Go to the library [Guiseley] with Mama at 7.30 an come home with a book on the wives of the Roman emperors. It's very good and I read 100 pages before midnight. Don't even think about having a bath or anything and by the time I realise what time it is I discover everyone has deserted me and gone off to bed.

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