Thursday September 20, 1979

_. Ally came over just after 7pm on the spur, or whatever it is you say when somebody is unexpected. We watched 'Top of the Pops' with Maria. Punk Rock is so boring.

Went at 8:3o to Lynn's. We sat until 10:30 drinking Cinzano and 'Clan Dew', and when this oasis of alcohol evaporated at 10 we went over to the Red Lion for a 'quick one'. I spent nearly £5 in half an hour. The girls were drinking doubles, as usual. I gave Dave the £10 that I borrowed for the holiday.

We went back to Lawn Road for Italian food and sat until after 1am.

-=-

Thursday February 15, 1979

_. Like most Britons I am now suffering from 'pnuemocallaghanicosis'. I have taken to my warm bed with a book.

Meanwhile, outside we are heading for a second ice-age. Giant mammoths & fur clad sabre tooth beasts are roaming around, and are quite the vogue. Old age pensioners, clutching red pension books, are being encased in glacial formations. Archaeologists in the year 4062 will be gasping and falling over themselves with delight on finding these perfectly preserved, if solid OAPs.

Debbie Harry.

Snuggled all day with the tale of Mrs Jordan and the Duke of Clarence, aka King William IV by Jean Plaidy. I will have to look at some serious work on this very interesting subject. I did read something years ago, before the ice came. I did emerge from my pit at tea time and later sat looking interested and alert with Jim and Margaret.

Saw Debbie Harry on Top of the Pops on the BBC and have decided that Miss Harry is perhaps the most perfect specimen of the female sex ever to have walked the planet. She is the twentieth century's answer to Helen of Troy, Lillie Langtry and Bessie Braddock.

To bed feeling slightly better but resolved not to attempt the YP tomorrow.






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Thursday January 5, 1978

_.Received an application form from YTV. Filled in the details tonight including a list of my exam results, and a pathetic sight they are indeed.

At lunchtime I went to the library. Got books on James, Duke of Monmouth by Bryan Bevan; King James II by Jock Haswell; 'Whose Body?' by Dorothy L. Sayers and 'The Scarlet Pimpernel' by Baroness Orczy. Tonight I read a good deal of the Monmouth book. He is of course an ancestor of the Dukes of Buccleuch and of Lady Alice Montagu Douglas Scott, mother of the Duke of Gloucester, and an aunt of the Queen. Don't quite understand why Charles II elevated his bastard son to such rank. Did the King have the idea of making the duke his heir but at some stage changed his mind? The King's Roman Catholic sympathies naturally endeared him to his brother and rightful heir, the Duke of York. It is quite a few years since I looked at the Stuart period. My sympathies are very much with the two Charleses, but James II leaves me quite cold. Neither am I fond of the dour William III or the fat, white Queen Anne.

Saw 'Top of the Pops' and had a glass of cider with Mum and Dad. It was incredibly strong and almost blew my head off.

Retired to bed with the Monmouth book relatively early.

-=-

Thursday December 1, 1977

Feel revoltingly weak, dizzy and painful about the head, back, arms, legs. At work I did very little, and after collecting my wage, including a tax rebate of £20 by courtesy of Mr Healey, I left for home.

I took something hot to bed and read 'The Count of Monte Cristo', which I almost finished. Yes, nearly.  You may be needing tranquilisers I know, but there's no point trying to deceive you is there?

with JPH.

Maria, John and JPH came to see us this afternoon. Mum brought the baby up to my room and he crawled about on the floor. He liked my clock and kept saying "tick tock", "shoe", "flower", and made various horse impressions.

Saw 'Top of the Pops' tonight and eventually passed into a coma. For God's Sake I hope nobody creeps into my room during the night and switches off my life support machine.

Carole's latest treatment was a success and she may be out of hospital by Christmas. I was supposed to see her today but when she telephoned me with the news I told her I was ill. Bless her.

-=-

Thursday April 21, 1977

Felt buggered all day. Like an old age pensioner in fact. Weak and wilting I fear.

Union Jacks flutter on the tops of masts in Leeds as indeed they are fluttering throughout the nation in honour of Her Majesty's 51st birthday. The sight of that red, white and blue surge quickened my pace somewhat but knackered I was all the same.

Martyn: 

Nothing worth mentioning about the YP other than pay day, and the least said about that pathetic subject the better.

Home for tea with just Mum and Dad. Tony called in to see if I'm going out tonight and I let him know the sad news. He too is short of cash but he's not letting it stand in his way. With that he's off back to Ilkley leaving me with my bacon pizza and chicken leg.

Martyn phoned to confirm tomorrow nights rendezvous with Emu and Gayle. He said Emu is quite nice and a good laugh which is a tremendous improvement on his last bulletin. He adds that he saw her earlier in the week and now approves of her fully after taking a sly peep down the front of her dress. We also talked about the holiday - 10 weeks away!

Saw 'Top of the Pops'. Retired to bed in the region of 11 and continued reading. Just heard Georgie Fame's new record on the old wireless and have taken a tremendous shin to it. 'Daylight' it's called, but it's far from daylight now and I'm going to bed. Oh bed, faithful old bed.

-=-

Thursday December 9, 1976

A weird day. Dad and I go down the lane at 7.30 in freezing circumstances expecting to get a lift with Jim. I have to tell you now that no lift arrived. By 8o'clock we were poised at the bus stop ready for action and to make matters worse, no bus arrived either. Frozen solid we were by 8.30 when a ruddy cart eventually turned up to take us to Leeds. Black ice and 45 minutes later I was at the YP. One and a half hours on the road!

Had lunch at the Central with Dad [he's on a course] and a work colleague of his called John. Good laugh.

Meanwhile: That night: Lynne comes up for a meal at 6.30, early for her, and we're both in jovial mood. After 'Top of the Pops' we decide to attend the cinema. Go to Headingley and see Margaux Hemingway in 'Lipstick', a tale of rape and vengeance. Very good it was too. However, the highlight of the night came afterwards in the carpark. Whilst negotiating a reverse in treacherous conditions Lynne had the misfortune to collide with another vehicle. It was doubly unfortunate that the incumbent of the bereaved motor car happened to be of Oriental origin - a Jap to be precise. The gentleman couldn't speak a word of the Queen's English. The usual exchange of names and addresses took place - written on a crumpled cinema ticket, and we parted ways and disappeared into the night. I have only just forgiven them for Pearl Harbour. I laughed all the way home. Lynne saw the lighter side after a while.

Thursday August 26, 1976

I've committed a ghastly crime. After 21 years as a law abiding member of society I have now fallen into the abyss of degradation and sin. What has this man done to to place him in eternal damnation, you are all asking? At 11.20pm last night I, Michael Rhodes, did wilfully and knowingly drink a glass of WATER. Yes, I know you cannot find the words to describe this diabolical action. Sorry everyone. I'll never do it again. It's not as if I like water anyway.

Latest DROUGHT News: The Thames is now non-existant. Evidently it dried up in the early hours of the morning, and there's nothing Mr Callaghan, or anyone else for that matter, who can do anything about it. The elephants at London Zoo are having to bathe in dirty, used water - poor things.

Lynne comes up at 7.30 and we watch 'Top of the Pops' with Mum. At 8 o'clock we go to the Hare where we have some revolting cider which virtually cripples us. Lynn had crippling pains in her abdomen, and the fish and chips in Otley didn't help matters. We go on to the Black Bull [Otley], but after half an hour she still feels off it. We come back to Pine Tops for coffee and look at the photo albums. Lynne shows Mum Peter's [21st birthday] party pictures. Hear that CB rang te ask if I'm going to Thornton-Le-Dale on Friday. I'm not going this weekend, but the weekend after. I'm working on Bank Holiday Monday.

Dave L goes to Gloucester next week & so on Saturday night it will have to be a 'do' at Oakwood Hall. No Lynne there of course, but no doubt I'll get by. I love freedom occasionally.

-==-

Saturday July 24, 1976

Wake up on Peter's floor at 8.30 and Mrs Mather makes me scrambled eggs on toast before Lynne drops me off at home at 9.30. Go into Guiseley this morning with Mum & Dad again. I buy a Yorkshire Post to see if Fred Manby had used the story I suggested to him about Lord David Dundas yesterday, and see that he has. How many times does the son of a marquess appear on 'Top of the Pops'?

See John and Maria who stand with us and chat for 10 minutes or so.

Later: John, Maria, David, Peter, Lynne, &c, gather for a sherry at Pine Tops. Lynne drives Sue, Peter and myself to a pub just outside Ripon where we stop for a drink. Lynne and Dave travelled together of course, and John & Maria go with Mum & Dad. After a drink in this horribly snobby pub John & Maria come with me and Lynne to show us the way to Wath. Alas, David's car broke down 2 miles from Wath but managed to get the car there after about half an hour. The spitfire's been nothing but trouble since John purchased it about 14 months ago.

The dinner was marvellous and the ten of us had a really good laugh. I told a sick joke about poor Lesley Whittle (a girl kidnapped and murdered by the notorious Black Panther) which was received with little pleasure, but otherwise it was a great success. Dinner was only £3.50 per head, and although I paid for Lynne's I still think it was well worth it. Set for home at nearly 12 o'clock after dancing about in the shadows of the George & Dragon car park. Maria and I were penguins, and David did a very good impersonation of an elephant. David abandoned his car near Ripon on the way back and Dad dropped him off at the Dyneley (Arms). Back to Pine Tops for handing over presents and cards to Maria. I promise to buy her something next week and she doesn't seem to mind the delay.

-==-

Thursday April 15, 1976

Sorry about this pals, but when you try writing a diary a week after the actual event it does tend to become a little confusing and I'm afraid that this week Thursday comes after Tuesday and before Wednesday. Confusing I know, but it makes a change.

Do nothing all night. See 'Top of the Pops' with Mum. The only interesting item of the day. Carole didn't ring and all in all it's been most ordinary and mundane.

-==-

Thursday February 5, 1976

Another wet, horrible day. Work was a load of crap too. Left at 4pm after working through lunch and travel home in daylight which is unusual.

Carole rang me at work whilst I was out of the office. Eileen made it sound urgent and so I rang C at Bradford. She didn't want anything in particular but reminded me she's coming to my place straight from work. (By 'straight from work' of course she means straight after she's spent half the evening round at Maria's gossiping.) Women!

Nothing in the news other than the Jeremy Thorpe affair again, which is getting boring now. The Press get onto a good thing and then go and ruin it by ramming it down our throats.

Carole comes at 6.30 and I make her beans on toast. We then watch 'Top of the Pops' together with Mum & Dad and at 8 0'clock get a bus to the Hare. After messing about for half an hour in the lounge we go through to the tap room where we win £1 on the domino lottery.

Carole is something of a celebrity in the Hare & Hounds tap room because she's the only woman there under 50 years of age and under 18 stone, and the locals look upon her as a second Jayne Mansfield or Raquel Welch.

-==-

Thursday December 11, 1975

Uneventful day. Do not see Carole and stay at home in front of the tv all night. Laugh with Dad at this London hostage business. If they are still being held at Christmas I can see Sir Robert Mark, the Metropoltian Police Commissioner, dressed as Santa Claus, lowering a sack full of presents down the chimney of the Balcombe Street flat!

See 'Top of the Pops' and a programme about Prince Charles being invested as a companion Water Rat. Mike Yarwood, Ronnie Corbett and all the usual bunch were taking the mickey, but HRH came over marvellously as usual. The whole nation now regards as some sort of 'Boy Wonder' and the papers are full of 'when he is King he will do this' and 'when he is King he will do that...' &c. The Sunday Trash said last week that the dear Queen will abdicate in ten years time. I cannot believe that she'd do such a thing. She is strong enough to go on for 25 years yet and I'm certain that she'll be Queen until the day she dies - communist revolutions and uprisings set aside. It is an ancient tradition, I fear, for the media to idolise the heir and cast the dear old monarch into the shadows.

See Spike Milligan at 9 o'clock on BBC2. He is a genius beyond his years. No one seems to appreciate his talents and I fear his genius won't be fully recognised until after he's gone.

Climb into the bath at 9.30 and go to bed shortly afterwards.

-==-

Thursday September 4, 1975

At lunchtime I bought the book 'My Queen and I' by William Hamilton, MP. I don't really know why I bought it, because I said I never would, but I feel that before one criticises a person one must first listen to their argument. I sit at home reading it, and fuming. A really terrible publication, and poor Princess Margaret especially is pulled to pieces and generally demolished. You would think that because he is a Member of Parliament Mr Hamilton would be presumed to be of some intelligence, but he most certainly is not. Never have I read such drivel. How he twists the facts around is quite incredible. Cunning, sly and immensely wicked - he really is. If certain members of the Royal Family aren't as hard as nails, they will surely have been in tears reading this book.

See 'Top of the Pops' which isn't too good, and give Lynn and Sue £1 each to help them on their way across Europe tomorrow. The place will certainly be dull without them both, and as Mum was saying, we are losing four really because Dave and Peter will be gone too. Lynn especially seems excited tonight. She says they get the ferry to Belgium at 8.30 on Saturday, then go through Luxembourg and Switzerland to Italy, where they arrive late on Sunday afternoon. Mum is dreading them going and I think she'll be a bit tearful tomorrow.

Horror of Horrors! Met Dave B in town this afternoon and went to Whitelocks for a quick drink. He informs me that not one single holiday photo of mine came out. The whole film was ruined, and he's not sure whether the camera is broken or not. Just think, if Chris had not taken a camera too, we would have no photographs of our Majorcan holiday. Dave didn't say much other than that he considers himself the guardian of the bunch going tomorrow. I'm sure Peter and Martyn are quite capable of looking after themselves and the women aren't so useless either - especially after their Spanish extravaganza last year.

-==-

Thursday July 3, 1975

Another gorgeous day. We haven't had a drop of rain now for about five weeks, and it's absolutely fantastic.

Sarah Elizabeth Collis and I go to Whitelocks again, where we meet David B. Those two get on with one another like a house on fire, and David amuses Sarah really phenomenally. The two of us stagger back to work in the blazing heat and we don't tell Carol or Eileen that we've been out together. They believe what we say, though we do slip up occasionally, but quite unnoticed. A real darling, Sarah is. We're doing Town Street tomorrow night, so don't blame me if the writing on Friday's page is illegible.

See TV all evening, including 'Top of the Pops' which is full of rubbish.

I'm not writing any more now, so you can just get lost, the lot of you.

-==-

Thursday May 29, 1975

The Press is still full of the Prince of Wales's beard. Certain annals of the newspaper industry have gone so far as to say that HRH was breaking naval rules by parading himself with his moustache before his mother, the Lord High Admiral. In the Royal Navy you either have to have a 'full-set' i.e. moustache and beard, or nothing at all, and when His Royal Highness was installed as Grand Master of the Order of the Bath - brandishing a ginger moustache - he was breaking the law. Anyway, he left to join his ship, the Hermes, later on today clean shaven. And that is the end of that.

Saw 'Top of the Pops' on TV and do little else. At least it is pay day today, and £6 is going into the bank for the holiday. Bye Bye.

-==-

Thursday May 15, 1975

It's pay day today, and once again the little man in cashiers seems to have forgotten my extra payment for working nights a couple of weeks ago. Kathleen deals with it and vows to me that next Thursday I will receive the miserable pitance owed to me.

Saw 'Top of the Pops' which was utter rubbish as usual, and you'll never believe this, but I went to bed at 9pm! Nine o'clock no less. If you are astounded you have every right to be because I cannot have been in bed at nine since I was six or maybe seven years-old. It wasn't that I felt particularly tired either, but the television got on my nerves so much I just had to escape. 'The Wonderful World of Jacques Cousteau' or something equally Walt Disneyfied. Aaarrghh! Putrid, nasty BBC programmes are sinking even lower.

-==-

Thursday February 13, 1975

Boring day really. See television all evening including 'Top of the Pops' and a few other miserable offerings. Have a bath and tidy myself up generally. Going out on a fool-hardy venture tomorrow night. All the way to Linton in the Dales just for a few drinks! Bloody ridiculous. You know, it was that place we went to in August with the ring on the ceiling.

-==-

Thursday January 23, 1975

Nothing much to report today. See 'Top of the Pops' on TV this evening, and it's quite amazing how sober it's all becoming. Pop is on the decline.

Still deep into 'Edward VII'. I realise now that poor King Edward was only lecherous because Queen Victoria refused him any position or decent job. Sixty years is a long time to wait for a responsible position in 'the family business.'

This referendum nonsense is getting completely out of hand. The Labour government is making a serious mistake if it thinks that the British people want to make a choice for themselves. Why bother having a Houses of Parliament if the MPs are going to give all decisions over to us. The ordinary man in the street knows sod all about the Common Market, but one thing is certain, it takes no Sir Christopher Soames to realise the ridiculousness in withdrawing our membership when it took all those years and all that money to get us in. I for one do not intend exercising my so-called right to vote when the time comes.

-==-

Thursday October 17, 1974

See in the EP that Princess Elizabeth of Yugoslavia is having an affair with Richard Burton, the notorious profligate and actor. The princess is a first cousin of the Kents, being a niece of Princess Marina, Duchess of Kent; and thus is a second cousin of the Prince of Wales, Duke of Edinburgh, &c. A remarkable coincidence arises from this romance which the Press doesn't seem to have caught on to. It is that the Burtons are, or where before Liz (Taylor) got her divorce, good friends of President Tito of Yugoslavia. Putting two and two together Tito, in one of his discussions with Burton, could have intimated that on his retirement he was considering restoring the monarchy. Does he intend to place Princess Elizabeth on the throne and make Burton the Prince Consort of Yugoslavia? It is not impossible. The twice-wed princess took Burton to lunch with Princess Alexandra at the weekend.

Don't feel too well today. My throat, chest, nose and other numerous parts are quite poorly and exhausted. Could do with a few days off really. At lunchtime I get more Windsor photos and copies of those taken at John's 18th birthday party - £3.70 they rushed me.

Amused by an article in 'Private Eye' which says that since Princess Anne married her 'stable lad' many people have traced the decline of our country's status from that shameful occasion. It also states, in its infinite wisdom, that since the princess was made a GCVO in August, she is 'Princess Anne, Dame Anne Phillips' and not 'Princess Anne, Mrs Mark Phillips'.

Ring Denny who isn't very informative, and speak to Marita who is visiting her. See 'Top of the Pops' then ring Lynne. Spend half an hour on the phone and poor Mummy was quite desolate at the thought of the coming phone bill. Have bath and see tv all evening. My voice feels like it's on the verge of collapse. Goodnight everyone.

-==-

Thursday August 22, 1974

Cloudy, overcast day but really enjoyable. Sarah, Carol J, and I go to Whitelocks, a charming 18th century pub in Leeds centre. We get somewhat sloshed before staggering back to the YP at 1 o'clock. Sarah really is too gorgeous when she's sloshed - a pity she can't always be that way.

Katleen isn't at all nice about our boozing excursion, though she lets us out for 4.30. The three of us, Sarah, Carol and I decide to have a night out next week so that we can really let ourselves go.

Today, Sarah confimed that Janice is pregnant, and says that Janice has never told me because she's too shy to do so. Not characteristic of Mrs Beaumont. Come home on the same bus as Sarah, who is too fanciable for words.

Do nothing in the evening except see 'Top of the Pops' and sit with Susan and Peter listening to records.

--==--

Thursday January 31, 1974

Marita 19. The last day of January, and it certainly is a good month to have behind you. We have had an unbelievably mild winter so far but February always holds a few snowy surprises up its sleeve. March isn't much better either.

Went to Benton Park at 12 on the 55 with Sarah. Very nice journey together. Sarah and I always seem to have the same half-days. School is completely hateful. CB is obviously angry with me about something or another. MM says very little. We play a guessing game all afternoon - Maggie Edwards and Liz Clapham are fun. Leave at 4. Home by 4.30.

Quiet evening at home with a massive surprise at tea-time. Discover an extra £12 in my pay. A sizeable tax rebate. Mum is thrilled at my sudden rise in fortune. See 'Top of the Pops' - Mud is still in the number 1 spot. Bed at 10.30 when the tv closes down - such a hideous innovation on the part of Her Majesty's government.

-==-