Friday January 7, 1977

Lynne collects me at 8pm and we nip down to the Hare for a quickie. Chat with Simon and his lady friend and of course the intrepid Judith. She is down in the dumps about something. I fear I have let her down over the 'Pink Panther' project? Just as we're leaving the pub Dave L comes in. He's going on later to see MM and Marita and then going to 'the dogs' [racing]. To the Damn Yankee in Harrogate for a pizza. Very good as usual.

Damn Yankee, Harrogate.

Lynne is in good spirits with a new haircut and a handbag and new shoes. On to a pub in a remote spot near  Harrogate before setting out to Thornton-le-Dale. Arrive at midnight. The Mathers still have the Christmas tree up and other Xmas regalia. I am appalled at this and tell Lynne of the hideous bad luck brought down on the households and members of families who fail to remove these frivolities by Epiphany. She pales at my sombre lecture and promises to do something about it. Bed at 1am in Pete's room. He's at the Ratcliffe residence until Sunday. Didn't see Mrs M[ather] tonight. She worries me really. It depresses her so much dwelling out in the wilds of North Yorkshire.
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Thursday January 6, 1977

Epiphany no less. Derek Naylor [EP Features] has given me a book entitled 'Astrology and the Royal Family' which supposedly gives character analysis of members of that august dynasty - the House of Windsor. Shit really. The Queen Mother, it seems, is going to die in 1979, if Roger Elliot has his way, and the Prince of Wales will marry a 'big, busty blond' before next Christmas. Does Davina Sheffield have big tits? [Sorry, your future Majesty]. It's a load of bunkum.

Davina Sheffield: future Queen?

Queen Mother: to die in 1979.

Tonight: Martyn comes at 8 o'clock with another Martyn [Knipe] also with a Y, who is on a RN submarine based at Gosport in Hampshire. We go over to Carla's at Baildon and then go to Bingley for a few pints. Laugh at the so-called John Constable picture in the lounge. Carla is quite a bit of fun when she gets warmed up. At midnight we dump her and the three of us go on to Oakwood Hall, which is completely dead. Not a soul we know in the place. I drink pernod but the two Martyns look somewhat sober. Home at 2.30am. Raid the freezer for fish cakes.

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Wednesday January 5, 1977

Peter Fearon approached me again today about my joining the ranks of the journalist brigade. Kathleen overheard the conversation and reminded me of my non existent future at the Yorkshire Post. I'd probably make a good reporter but I never do anything about it. Kathleen went upstairs to the personnel department to get an application form for me but came back saying Mr Austin-Clarke is hardly my closest friend. Malcolm Barker is wanting a junior male reporter and K suggests that I compile a letter to him saying the usual thing that grovelling serfs like me are supposed to say to editors of well-established newspapers. I must do this for peace of mind.

Rang David G in Stockport tonight to say I'm going to see him on January 15. We have to get the holiday sorted by then or we'll be knackered. I will get on to Pete M so that we can go over in the van.

Retire to bed at 11 with 'Claudius the God', by Robert Graves, a continuation of 'I, Claudius'. A bit heavy going at first but I may well be sat here with it clasped between my knees [the book] at 2am.

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Tuesday January 4, 1977

Please forgive the silly way I've begun my 1977 journal. In future I will really try to act properly and do my best to be informative whenever possible. Thank you. Oh, by the way, will these volumes be priceless one day like the papers of Mr Scrope Davies? Agreed, I'm not a friend of the likes of Lord Byron or John Keats, but will Chris Monckton do? He is the heir to a peerage, you know.

What a day! Nasty and thoroughly boring. Home at 5.15 to find Martyn and a friend of his being entertained by Lynn. I inform him of the holiday situation [news which I received from Miss Akroyd today] and we plan to 'arrange' a meeting later this week. ____. Must contact the Stockport contingent. The girls in the office are already booking up dates so I'll have to rush.

Lynn

Did I say some abominable things about Miss Mather yesterday? If you, dear reader, are by any chance of fate the progency of myself and the much maligned lady - do forgive me. Your mother doesn't deserve such foul criticism. We can all say some unforgivable things at times.

Lynne and I went wild tonight. Starting off at Guiseley library where I paid a 48p fine it just got wilder and wilder. We sped to the Commercial until 9.30 and although I'm something of a drinker I'm very much afraid that two pints of Stella Artois later I was half pissed. We went on to the Hare. Judith was holding court in the lounge of the latter mentioned tavern and at the first available opportunity she accosted me and enquired: "What about the Pink Panther?" I shall have to ring her and discuss this tete a tete in greater detail. It was fun whispering and carrying on whilst Lynne was encased upon the 'loo' or whatever term is fashionable nowadays. Home in a tipsy state at 11 o'clock. Zzzz ....


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Monday January 3, 1977

Oh Hell. I'm going raving bonkers. I'm sat here crouched on the lounge floor wondering just what to write. I'm worrying about the 1977 holiday. Martyn, Glenn and Dave G are all set in the idea that Ibiza is the place, but Pete and Chris are just dithering about. I'm also pondering on the subject of Miss Lynne Mather. ________. This is the end of our relationship. I can feel it in my bones. Now I know why King Henry VIII had six wives. With some men boredom sets in quite rapidly. King Harry and I would have seen eye to eye on most things I imagine. Would that I had an execution block and a skilled swordsman______.

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Sunday January 2, 1977

2nd after Christmas. Mama and Papa's birthday. Need I give their respective ages again? I'm sure that by now you're all aware of the numerical rigmarole so why should I bother? The events of the day are not very noteworthy. I ring Lynne at Thornton-le-Dale and she isn't very communicative. Who cares? [I wish I could get out of this habit of asking rhetorical questions every other sentence].

Marita Fountain

MM: he and Marita will be married ....

David came at 7.25pm and the two of us went to Rawdon for Marita and then on for MM. Where do you think we were going to spend Sunday evening? Would you believe ten pin bowling? Yes. Bowling of all things. To Leeds went the four of us and we spent three or four hours pleasurably bowling. Yes bowling. What more can I say? From here we go to the True Briton Inn at Chapel Allerton [?] where we discuss holidays. David tells me horror stories of the collapse of Christine B's latest romance on New Year's Eve. The poor demented child! I will have to contact her and offer what assistance I can muster.

Back to MM's for coffee until 1.30am. He and Marita will be married as sure as tomorrow's Monday.

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Saturday January 1, 1977

New Year's Day. I'm saying nothing at all. I'm so ill. Vomiting, &c. Jimmy Macdonald and I sat up in the small hours discussing most things - including Carole Phillips. I referred to her as holding the charm of a mythological being - a transfixing beauty - a Helen of Troy. Jimmy caught onto this. Oh dear.

I watched the BBC2 footage of the Coronation from 10am until 5pm. Lynne left at 11am.

Troy's answer to Carole Phillips....

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