Mama is going to flog the family jewels so that she can make her annual pilgrimage to the hot climate of the Continent. Lynn and Sue will be taking Al and Christine Dibb along as chaperones.
Get up at nearly 12. Have beans on toast for luncheon then see the tv until bedtime. Monty Python closed the evening. A boring Sunday by anyone's standards and the weekend is over far too suddenly.
The selling of the family jewels seems to be the only item of excitement, and what poor Lady Crawshaw would say if she heard I don't know. You may recall from last year that Lady Crawshaw is Dad's only sister. Born Dorothy Claptrap-Rhodes she married in 1951, the Hon Leslie Muggins-Disley-Cutout, DSO, and the peerage is held by 'Aunt Dot' in her own right. She's the 18th baroness. The heir to the title is her eldest son, the Hon Robert Muggins-Cutout, educated at Trinity College, Cambridge.
The items of value in Mama's jewelry collection amount to a semi-platinum-nu-form-vinyl-type locket (Woolworths Ltd circa 1963) valued at fifteen shillings in old currency. The other main article in the Muggins Collection is a plastic, unbreakable mug (1923) commemorating the birth of Lord Harewood. The last article, is, in fact, quite priceless.
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Showing posts with label auntie dorothy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label auntie dorothy. Show all posts
20090530
20090501
Wednesday October 3, 1973
Got up at approximately 7.45. Realise that I have to complete a George III essay by Friday and therefore decide to take today off school and spend my time making notes ready for the essay: 'Was George III harshly treated by his critics?'
I sit in the dining room until nearly 1 o'clock whilst Dad presses his uniforms and tidies around in general. Not making much headway with my notes. Mother comes in from the hairdresser at 1.30. Uncle Harry rings at 2 and invites himself here for dinner tonight - I do like Uncle H tremendously. Mum and I have a laugh about Auntie Dorothy - who is on a lone walking holiday in Scotland this week - leaving Uncle Les and the children at home. What a nut that woman is indeed!
After lunch Mum and Dad go out.I play Rachmaninov's 2nd Piano Concerto on the stereo - at full volume. I feel like writing to June to tell her how much I love her and always will do. But it would do no good. She thinks nothing of me now.
Later: Uncle Harry arrives at 5.45 and eats meat and potato pie heartily. At 8.30, after an urgent telephone call from Chris, John and I go to the Fleece in Horsforth where Chris joins us at 9. We spend a very pleasant evening discussing the events of the past month or two.
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I sit in the dining room until nearly 1 o'clock whilst Dad presses his uniforms and tidies around in general. Not making much headway with my notes. Mother comes in from the hairdresser at 1.30. Uncle Harry rings at 2 and invites himself here for dinner tonight - I do like Uncle H tremendously. Mum and I have a laugh about Auntie Dorothy - who is on a lone walking holiday in Scotland this week - leaving Uncle Les and the children at home. What a nut that woman is indeed!
After lunch Mum and Dad go out.I play Rachmaninov's 2nd Piano Concerto on the stereo - at full volume. I feel like writing to June to tell her how much I love her and always will do. But it would do no good. She thinks nothing of me now.
Later: Uncle Harry arrives at 5.45 and eats meat and potato pie heartily. At 8.30, after an urgent telephone call from Chris, John and I go to the Fleece in Horsforth where Chris joins us at 9. We spend a very pleasant evening discussing the events of the past month or two.
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20090428
Thursday September 13, 1973
Grandfather's send off. Go to Benton Park in the morning and come home at 12.0. Mother, Dad and I leave for Pudsey to collect grandfather's oldest friend, Joe Dickinson. He seems upset when he gets in the car, and Dad diplomatically keeps him talking to prevent him dwelling on the sadness. Arrive at Liversedge, or was it Heckmondwike (?) at 1.30. The four of us go for a coffee. See Uncle Harry at 1.45.
The day is somewhat cold and overcast and the five of us go into the local park in order to kill time before 2.30. Auntie Janet comes running into the park to tell us that Auntie Jadwega is coming on the bus (from Nottingham) to Heckmondwike, where we can then meet her. By 2.30 she is still nowehere to be seen. We can do nothing but leave for the chapel of rest without her. Uncle Joe, Auntie Ethel, Jeremy and Janet and young Nicholas are coming down the street with Uncle John and Auntie Sheila. Arrive chapel for brief prayers. Grandma, looking very brave, with her sons, arrives. Thus, we are all assembled. Still no Auntie Jadwega.
Go to the crematorium, where Auntie Dorothy is waiting. No Uncle Les or family. Terrible service - the Salvation Army. It's not as though I have any prejudice against the Salvation Army, but they made it such a theatrical affair. It's not as if Grandfather ever possessed a tamborine. The cremation was terrible. All ultra-modern and repulsive.
It appealed very much to my sense of humour when, at the end, a hymn came on the record player and the curtains were drawn across the coffin. Somewhat like a Dave Allen sketch on tv. One cannot beat a good traditional burial. Auntie Janet was screaming at the end.
Leave at 3.10 for Grandma's at Nelson St, Liversedge, where about 20 members of the Rhodes family are gathered. Auntie Dorothy went immediately home of course. Pandemonium! Auntie Jadwega arrived in a taxi at 3.15 - all in black with a massive black umberella. (She's the Polish-born wife of Dad's brother, Uncle Bert). She was very distressed of having missed the funeral of her father-in-law. Still half in and half out of the taxi she was shouting in her thick Polish accent: "Oh I could cry. We go first to Wakefield, then to Barnsley Oh so slowly. I vos so mad." The noise she was making had everybody out on the street and Grandma with Auntie Janet came to investigate. She bounded from the car and embraced Grandma. "Oh I am so fumigated!" (I think she meant to say she was 'fuming' with rage and not fumigated.) Poor Auntie Eddy (her nickname) had come all the way from Nottingham only to remain at Grandma's for 10 minutes, clutching her big umberella between her massive knees. I think she must be 16st.
Anyway, I hope she really didn't mean 'fumigated' or else our house is lousy today. I may joke, but I love her really. Leave at 3.45. Take poor Joe Dickinson home and bring Auntie Jadwega back to Pine Tops for tea. Spend a quiet night. Mum is being experimented on by Aunt Jadwega, who is a masseuse.
After Dad had taken Eddy for her train at 8 he went out for a drink with Mum and Uncle Harry, my favourite uncle on Dad's side of the family. They came home at 12.0. with loads of drink, and we all sat until 2am. Uncle H stayed the night.
What a day!
--==--
The day is somewhat cold and overcast and the five of us go into the local park in order to kill time before 2.30. Auntie Janet comes running into the park to tell us that Auntie Jadwega is coming on the bus (from Nottingham) to Heckmondwike, where we can then meet her. By 2.30 she is still nowehere to be seen. We can do nothing but leave for the chapel of rest without her. Uncle Joe, Auntie Ethel, Jeremy and Janet and young Nicholas are coming down the street with Uncle John and Auntie Sheila. Arrive chapel for brief prayers. Grandma, looking very brave, with her sons, arrives. Thus, we are all assembled. Still no Auntie Jadwega.
Go to the crematorium, where Auntie Dorothy is waiting. No Uncle Les or family. Terrible service - the Salvation Army. It's not as though I have any prejudice against the Salvation Army, but they made it such a theatrical affair. It's not as if Grandfather ever possessed a tamborine. The cremation was terrible. All ultra-modern and repulsive.
It appealed very much to my sense of humour when, at the end, a hymn came on the record player and the curtains were drawn across the coffin. Somewhat like a Dave Allen sketch on tv. One cannot beat a good traditional burial. Auntie Janet was screaming at the end.
Leave at 3.10 for Grandma's at Nelson St, Liversedge, where about 20 members of the Rhodes family are gathered. Auntie Dorothy went immediately home of course. Pandemonium! Auntie Jadwega arrived in a taxi at 3.15 - all in black with a massive black umberella. (She's the Polish-born wife of Dad's brother, Uncle Bert). She was very distressed of having missed the funeral of her father-in-law. Still half in and half out of the taxi she was shouting in her thick Polish accent: "Oh I could cry. We go first to Wakefield, then to Barnsley Oh so slowly. I vos so mad." The noise she was making had everybody out on the street and Grandma with Auntie Janet came to investigate. She bounded from the car and embraced Grandma. "Oh I am so fumigated!" (I think she meant to say she was 'fuming' with rage and not fumigated.) Poor Auntie Eddy (her nickname) had come all the way from Nottingham only to remain at Grandma's for 10 minutes, clutching her big umberella between her massive knees. I think she must be 16st.
Anyway, I hope she really didn't mean 'fumigated' or else our house is lousy today. I may joke, but I love her really. Leave at 3.45. Take poor Joe Dickinson home and bring Auntie Jadwega back to Pine Tops for tea. Spend a quiet night. Mum is being experimented on by Aunt Jadwega, who is a masseuse.
After Dad had taken Eddy for her train at 8 he went out for a drink with Mum and Uncle Harry, my favourite uncle on Dad's side of the family. They came home at 12.0. with loads of drink, and we all sat until 2am. Uncle H stayed the night.
What a day!
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20090409
Thursday April 12, 1973
Awoke at 8.30. Mum bids me goodbye and goes to work. I sit with the Daily Mail and a coffee until 9.15. Have a hot bath. Prepare a urine sample for my medical - pissing into a bottle. I sit laughing to myself at the latest crisis occurring in the Rhodes family since we cut off diplomatic relations last September. It seems that my Auntie Dorothy fell down an open man-hole at work, and a poor hospital worker was impailed on the end of her boot. She suffered severe damage to one of her feet. Her husband has contracted his imaginary rash again. He uses this in a variety of excuses. This time it was used to get rid of Grandad Rhodes. Aunt is now undergoing treatment at her home in Crawshaw something or other in Pudsey. My grandfather is now sponging on the hospitality of Uncle Harry at Wakefield - much to Harry's annoyance. My Grandad tore one of Uncle Harry's best white shirts to bits in order to create a dish cloth. I can see he won't last there for very long. Cousin Sam broke out of his cell on Mother's Day and went to make Auntie Mavis her breakfast in bed. While he was downstairs rolling up newspaper for the fire, Auntie Mavis was quietly dialling the police who arrived on the scene with a strait jacket. Sam - "Dr Jekyll" went without force. What a family the Rhodeses are.
At 9.45 go with my urine sample to see Dr Murdoch in Guiseley. After 15 minutes he says that my x-ray was perfect and the remainder of me is in absolutely great form. Come home rejoicing at 10.45. Write a letter to June. Mum comes home at 12.30 with lunch. After lunch Sue plays the Supremes LP whilst I made some attempt to start my Economics essay. At 3.30 Mum, Dad and I went up to Hawksworth School to vote. Because it is a secret ballot I am not obliged to write down for whom I voted. But I suppose you can guess. Had a nice tea. Then watched television until 7.15. Set off for work where Sue and I had a set to with the greasy cooker and cupboards. I also accepted the proposal to de-grease the kitchen on Wednesday for £3. I am going to be a wealthy man in my own right before the year is up. Came home at 11.30. Browsed over my Economics essay until 12.45. Retired to bed after smoking a cig.
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At 9.45 go with my urine sample to see Dr Murdoch in Guiseley. After 15 minutes he says that my x-ray was perfect and the remainder of me is in absolutely great form. Come home rejoicing at 10.45. Write a letter to June. Mum comes home at 12.30 with lunch. After lunch Sue plays the Supremes LP whilst I made some attempt to start my Economics essay. At 3.30 Mum, Dad and I went up to Hawksworth School to vote. Because it is a secret ballot I am not obliged to write down for whom I voted. But I suppose you can guess. Had a nice tea. Then watched television until 7.15. Set off for work where Sue and I had a set to with the greasy cooker and cupboards. I also accepted the proposal to de-grease the kitchen on Wednesday for £3. I am going to be a wealthy man in my own right before the year is up. Came home at 11.30. Browsed over my Economics essay until 12.45. Retired to bed after smoking a cig.
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