Monday September 4, 1978

At lunchtime I went to Parker's Wine Bar with Sarah. Very amusing too.

Lynn can't stand the excitement and was forced to leave work at lunchtime with pains, nausea, and a general feeling of revulsion. On arriving home Mother calmed her with half a bottle of whisky and after a few obscene phone calls to awkward wedding guests she was fighting fit once more.

Saw part II of 'Holocaust'. The Jews have suffered like I never imagined. Mr Sadat ought to remember this when he begins his 'peace talks' with the Israelis at Camp David next week. For God's sake leave poor little Israel alone.

Did you know that according to the Sun newspaper Victorian society was rocked to its very foundations by the Prince of Wales's affair with Lillie Langtry? I certainly didn't. Certainly, Victorian 'high' society was far from shocked and the prince's 'set' accepted all Edward's mistresses because that was the done thing in those days. The rest of Victorian Britain ~ the coal miners, farm workers, shopkeepers, &c had absolutely no feelings whatsoever on this 'scandal' because they had no idea that anything was going on.

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Monday August 28, 1978

Late Summer Bank Holiday (UK, except Scotland)

To the YP on this August Bank Holiday Monday. Just Sarah and I in the office with absolutely nothing to do. Sarah always shows her face on public holidays. She says she refuses to celebrate with the masses and prefers to take her time off at her own discretion.

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Friday August 25, 1978

Trixie came to stay at the Dragonara for the duration of the Bank holiday. This evening Jacq and I went to meet her at the hotel and we took her to Len's Bar where Sue Tirbutt was having a party. Trixie was in fighting form and looked fit and well while knocking back the usual pints of bitter. I introduced her to (Alan) Macgregor, who served in the Royal Navy with Derek Sate. Hayden came with Jacq. _________________. Jacq, Trixie, Hayden, Sarah, Carol J and I went to the Nouveau club at 11pm from Len's and stayed until about 2:30.

Trixie left for the Dragonara at about 1am but we stuck it out until the bitter end. Sarah was horribly pissed. At the end of the evening Jacq disappeared into the darkness with Hayden and Carol drove Sarah and I to West End Lane, Horsforth. We staggered and fell around in her kitchen and I made some ridiculous adjustments to her father's shopping list on the table. At about 3 I retired to the pink suite at Ivory Towers.


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Tuesday August 22, 1978

Sunny and pleasant. Uncle Jack (Myers) was laid to rest this morning. Hilda, Mabel and Peter represented the entire Wilson Alliance.

Sarah was in great shape today. The doctor listened to her heart yesterday and told her she's suffering from neuralgia. Blimey, I thought you could only get that in your bloody face! This afternoon she actually told me that she fancied me ~ in those exact words. It came when I asked her why she always insists on grabbing hold of me. She replied: "Because I fancy you. That's why". Really funny it was. I don't think she's made such a statement in all the years of our association.

Christine phoned. Her Canadian professional ice~hockey playmate earns £100,000 a year, she says. Good God!

News: President Kenyatta died today in Mombassa. He was a bloody Mau Mau terrorist _______.

Down to Lawn Road with just Daddy to daub buttermilk paint everywhere until the tin ran dry. Home at 10:20. Went for a bath at 12:03.

Auntie Mabel had phoned Mama with a report on the funeral. __________________.

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Sunday August 13, 1978

13th after Trinity

The sun shone down upon us this morning. I was out of bed by 10am cooking breakfast for Jacq and myself.

Afterwards Susan worked wonders with Mum's hair and they both retreated into the garden. At 11:30 Jacq and I walked down to the Commercial. She told me it's our first date 'alone' ~ with just the two of us ~ since I came back from San Antonio. She says she was getting quite a complex about it.

We sat outside at the pub drinking Stella Artois and had beef sandwiches. Jacq says she wants to be a housewife and rear about 10 kids. Evidently, Derek is keen to be a grandfather. __________.

Our solitude was interrupted by Sarah and Delia who came down at about 1 o'clock. Whilst Sarah was inside getting the drinks Delia informed us that Sarah finished with John Mac last night because he's such a boring, dull person. In front of Jacq she went on to say that I'm more Sarah's type and says I stand a good chance. Jacq almost choked on her lager and blackcurrant. Sarah and Delia went over to gaze at the church for half an hour & then shot off leaving me with a note to pass on to dear Mama.

At 2 we returned home taking a short cut across the fields. Poor Jacq wasn't dressed for the hike. We sat with Mum in the garden and devoured more sandwiches until 4:30 when we went into Leeds together.

I was at the YP for 5:30. The evening was completely dead. At 10 I met Jacq again and we had a drink at the Central. Supping shandy listening to the pulsating music. Home in a taxi at midnight. My driver told me his dream is to have a milk round. Mum had left me a dinner on a plate. I didn't get to bed until 1:09am.

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Friday August 11, 1978

Moon's first quarter 21:06

Something of painful day in the rear. It's going to take fortitude, faith, and tremendous courage to keep battling on over the weekend.

I forgot to mention that in yesterday's Daily Express they published large black and white photographs of Princess Margaret holidaying in Italy with a new geezer, Mario d'Urso. It's Sarah's view that any new men in the life of the princess will now be received with approval at the palace because anybody is an improvement on Roddy Llewellyn. I disagree. Can you imagine a Court Circular from the future listing 'Princess Margaret, the Mrs Ronald Biggs' for instance?

Carole phoned this afternoon to enquire after the state of my bum. She was her usual warm self and we chatted for ten minutes. She and Fogarty are going to Es Canar in Ibiza in September. My God, who'd have thought she'd be doing this after last October's nightmare? I haven't seen Carole since June when Jacq, Sarah, John Mac and I went to Harrogate.

By this afternoon it came to pass that I have caught a dreadful cold. I broke the world sneezing record while stood on top of a pair of ladders filing pictures. However, I'm not going to let it deter me enjoying myself this evening.

David L and Jacq collected me ~ he'd picked her up at the Station Hotel ~ and we went to the Black Bull, my first visit to Otley since Christmas. From here we went to see Lynn and David and Lawn Road. Dave L was very impressed by the decor. It will be so good when it's all finished. Lynn looked very tired.

David L wanted his seafood and so we dashed to the Menston Arms in search of the 'Prawn Man', but were out of luck. Our last hope was at the Commercial where Annie (Lindley) supplied us with jars of mussels. She enquired after Mum & Dad, who never go out these days.

Jacq and I told Dave that we will definitely go to see him at the Barn Motel, Hockley Heath, Warwickshire. Jacq suggests we combine this with a visit to Derek & Carol Sate. Derek may be taking the boat out. __________.

Back at home Mum almost bit my head off for some reason and stormed off to bed. I watched the end of 'Tale of Two Cities' starring Ronald Colman. Very old and sad.

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Thursday August 10, 1978

Pleasant, enjoyable day. Sarah and I ventured to the Jubilee pub (opposite the Town Hall) where I had a couple of pints of lager while she knocked back DOUBLE Dry Martini with lemonade. A hardened little boozer is S.E. Collis.

I asked Kathleen whom she thought might be the next Pope. She said she had no idea and knows no princes of the Church other than Cardinal Heenan, who happens to have confirmed her when he was Bishop of Leeds.

Tonight at 7:30 Dave B and I went to Lawn Road and messed about until about 10. Not a particularly enlightening evening and my poor, scarred arse didn't help much. Poor Dave has only four weeks of normality remaining. My deepest sympathy goes out to all wretched souls now on the verge of that catastrophic leap into matrimony.

Jim and Margaret were here watching Caligula (John Hurt) get axed from the party leadership in 'I, Claudius' (again). The boozing lasted until 2:30am. Jim tells me Cardinal Benelli is favourite in the pontiff stakes and it's hardly worth it putting a bet on him.

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Monday August 7, 1978

Bank Holiday {Scotland}

Very wet, revolting day. Lounged in bed until 11 and then had a bacon and egg sandwich and cup of tea. My rear feels slightly more painful today. Had a hot bath.

Uncle Peter dropped in at lunchtime for a sandwich. At 2 Dad drove me to Otley Hospital. A fat, old doctor with half~moon spectacles took a brief look at my buttocks and told me to come back on Monday next week to have the stitches removed.

Home for 3. Watched the end of a 1940 Jack Benny film and did a little reading. To be quite honest, I'm bored silly just lounging around the house. Jacq phoned to enquire about the state of my bottom.

At 7:30 Delia and Sarah came to see Lynn and Mum about the flowers for the wedding. Sarah thinks I look unwell. She suggests I get a doctor's note and have the rest of the week off. I decide to take tomorrow off, but go back on Wednesday.

Wedding fever is now gripping Pine Tops. Mum and Lynn spent the night chatting about flowers, cakes, cards, and booze. Saw a far~fetched Roger Moore film and retired to bed at 11:30.

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Saturday August 5, 1978

Sun rises 05:30 Sun sets 20:43

First Day of Ramadan {tabular}

A full day at Burley painting the bathroom. It now resembles a peppermint cream because it's chocolate and lime. Dad and Dave put up beams in the lounge and Henry Baker fixed the sink, &c.

Home at 6:30 and an hour later, clad in white trousers, Philippe Junot~styled sandals, I was waiting at the Station Hotel for Jacq. She arrived ~ a vision of loveliness ~at 7:45 and we messed around for half an hour waiting for a bus to take us to the Fox & Hounds. From the start of the evening we were 'dogged' by accidents of one kind or another. On the way to meet Jacq I was seriously 'pawed' by an Alsatian dog who muddied my trousers. On our arrival at the Fox Jacq went to the ladies (toilet) taking with her my camera and flash cubes in her handbag and when she emerged minutes later she was screaming with laughter and bearing in her hands a conglomeration of wet photographic equipment ~ Yes, it had all accidentally fallen down the bog! Luckily all seemed to be working after we had shaken off the water.

Jacq and I were drinking Stella Artois and we became quite merry. David L joined us and Sue, Dave B, Lynn, John, Maria, Sarah C, John Mac, Christine D and Graham A, &c. Susan had had some sort of fall out with Peter about coming to the Fox and he had gone off somewhere with Chippy. He eventually followed her to the party (David L's) but she had nothing to do with him for the rest of the night. Jacq and I went with Sarah and John and he insisted on having fish and chips first which set us back a bit.

My recollections of the night are dim and mixed. Janet Rootes (Roots?) arrived with Mick Orchard and his wife and we laughed a good deal about old times. She talked about June B but I cannot remember exactly what was discussed. Tony, Martyn and Chris R were there.

A nasty accident occurred. I sat on a glass. A sherry glass to be precise. It gave me a deep cut at the top of my buttocks, and I bled profusely for over an hour. My white trousers were ruined. People filed solemnly through the bedroom to inspect the damage, and it soon became clear that I'd require stitches. So, at 5am Dave B drove me to Otley Hospital where I was given three stitches. The nurses were in hysterics at the sight of my holed and bloody underpants. I looked like the victim of an attempted assassination. We arrived home after 7. Lynn and Jacq were waiting patiently.

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Friday June 30, 1978

A very historic day indeed ~two fold. Prince Michael of Kent and Baroness Marie-Christine von Reibnitz married in a civil ceremony in Vienna. The Queen despatched Princess Anne and Earl Mountbatten of Burma to give the whole thing the feeling of approval. The new Princess Michael of Kent is very beautiful and looks far more 'royal' than poor Mrs Mark Phillips ever could.

The second historic happening took place on my head. After a nervous and nasty morning at the YP I went to Images salon in Yeadon at 1pm where I was permed, curled, frizzled ~ call it what you will. This operation lasted until after 3 and I emerged looking decidedly woolly and feeling very self-conscious.

At home opinion was varied. Typically Dad came right out with it and said I looked "queer". Mum thought it was, er "modern". Sue liked it, of course. John called in but couldn't speak for laughing.

Tonight: met Jacq at 8 on Wellington Street and then went by bus to the Original Oak at Headingley. She thinks the hair is marvellous and keeps patting me on the head over and over again. We were joined by Sarah and John Mac at 9. Their opinion is that I look like a professional footballer and Sarah too gets the urge to pat me ceaselessly about the top.

At 10:30 it was on to Grant McKee's party. I took a bottle of elderberry wine which was a knock-out although the turn-out was poor. Jacq and I became horribly drunk and at about 3am the pair of us were puking in a privet hedge in McKee's garden. ________. Paul Vallely gave us a review copy of their 'Nasty Media' record. Grant invited us to stay the night and I have every reason to believe we did.

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Thursday June 22, 1978

A cultural evening again. I phoned Jacq at 9 this morning to ask if she fancied the theatre this evening and she said yes but I would have to subsidise her, of course. I agreed to go with Sarah and John Mac to see 'A Family' or 'The Family' starring Eleanor Bron and Paul Scofield at the Grand (Theatre) Leeds (tickets £2). I have no money, but who cares?

Sarah bought one of my 'House of Holroyd' shirts for £5 which, unethical it may have been, but it was the only way I could remain solvent this week.

Sarah took me to Ivory Towers at 4 and I had a massive tea of salad, strawberries and cream, chocolate sundae, &c. The poor shih tzu was violently sick on the lounge carpet, and then did something else, but I averted my eyes and my tea was unspoiled. Sarah laughed at my recumbent figure reclining in the arm chair.

John Mac came at 7 and we went to the Grand where I met Jacq. She says she loathed the play but I thought it was brilliant. _________.

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Wednesday June 7, 1978

Her Majesty the Queen celebrated her (Silver) Jubilee one year ago today. Our poor, overworked monarch has a nasty duty ahead of her next week. She has to entertain the 'unspellable' president of Romania at the palace for three or four tortuous days and I don't think HM will be looking forward with an pleasure to this. Wasn't HM's great-aunt Helen, a princess of Edinburgh, and granddaughter of Queen Victoria, Queen of Romania? Helen wed into that shaky Balkan monarchy which fell in 1947. However, if the said president's visit helps Mr Callagas sell a couple of verticle take-off planes to the commies it will all have been worthwhile.

Anyway, Sarah finally got away today. Can you believe that her grandmother stood on a red table in the garden in Horsforth waving franticly as Sarah and Delia flew off from Yeadon? Such a pleasant, Goon-like sight that must have been.

The YP is hell without my whistling knee-grasping companion. Kathleen ought to retire _____________.

Tuesday June 6, 1978

Sarah goes off to Palma with Delia tomorrow, and to mark the occasion we had a wild lunchtime together. We bought sandwiches and went to Park Square and noshed and swilled tomato soup in the light drizzle. Yes folks, summer is over.

From Park Sq we went to Len's Bar and downed one, tiny drink and I bid her a fond 'bon voyage'. She and Delia are having a party on June 18 and so the ritual 'Father's Day' spectacular trip to Blackpool will be abandoned. The experience would be too great anyway, and with a holiday looming it would be sheer, unadulterated financial folly. Besides, the parties at Ivory Towers are equally entertaining.

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Saturday June 3, 1978

Sun rises 04:48 Sun sets 21:10

Hot again. I got out of bed at seven o'clock and made Jacq a cup of tea. I haven't been out of bed at this time on a Saturday for years.

Today is the Queen's official birthday. Birthday Honours: Sue Ryder is a new peeress and Freddie Laker a knight.

I took Jacq to her bus at 8:30 and walked home in the hot sunshine up Thorpe Lane. A beautiful day. A big breakfast with the family at 9:30 and then watched the Trooping the Colour on the BBC. Princess Margaret made her first public appearance since her divorce. The Queen Mother too was at Horse Guards Parade. I love the Queen Mother. She's now an institution in her own right. 'Go it, old girl!' The poor Queen must have been hot in that uniform.

At 11 Mum and Dad returned from Pudsey with my cousin Julie, who is staying the night. _________.

I met Jacq at 5:30 in Guiseley and we walked to the White Cross and sat outside in the sun. Home by 7:20 and Sarah and John Mac come. We went to the Harrogate Arms and the Damn Yankee. John and Jacq not too cheerful. Carole and Fogarty were in the Damn Yankee but we didn't speak. By 11:30 we were at home. Sarah at the end of her tether at Mr Mac's indecisiveness. In fact tempers were jagged. 

I calmed them all down with coffee and sent them home, including Jacqui.

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Wednesday May 31, 1978

Sat in the garden ~ wearing only my shorts ~ compiling this journal today. It has been another 'scorcher'.

Sarah and I went to Parker's (wine bar) at lunchtime. She bought me three or four pints and we discussed taking our 'concubines' out on Saturday in what will be an onslaught on Harrogate. Sarah and I haven't formed a foursome since Aug 1976 when we went out with Peter (Baker) and Lynne Mather.

A hot sticky afternoon filing portraits. You can imagine what bliss it was to sit in my deckchair with a heddy summer breeze blowing round my knees.

Also contacted Jacq who is burnt to a cinder after sprawling in the park all day yesterday. She says she's not eating this weekend.

Uncle Peter's daughter, Julie, is coming to stay with us on Saturday for what's left of the weekend. Peter's children are good kids.

This evening I took a layer off the lawns.

Prince Michael of Kent and Marie-Christine Troubridge have become engaged. The Queen consented in Privy Council this afternoon to her cousin's marriage with a Czech-born Roman Catholic with one ex husband still living. Formerly Baroness Marie-Christine von Reibnitz, Marie-Christine's marriage to Tom Troubridge was declared null a couple of weeks ago. I do not think any member of the Royal Family has married a Roman Catholic since the 1680s. However, I may be wrong. I have just seen the couple on the six o'clock news and I can tell you I would also renounce any claim to the throne to lay my hands on her. She's beautiful.

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Friday May 12, 1978

Met Jacq at the Hog's Head at 12 and we discussed our finances. I'm supposed to be changing over to receiving my pay on a monthly basis in October or November but because I'll be a month in hand I will have to work for four or five weeks with no cash. Like a nightmare, eh?

Kathleen was ill ~ dying at home. Sarah went off this afternoon with John MacM. Tomorrow they go to the RL Cup Final at Wembley.

Oh, I forgot to say that last night both Tony and Martyn phoned to invite me to Tony's flat warming in Shipley. I said yes immediately. Martyn said: "bring along your little lady friend from Clapham, or wherever." He ended with a typical "are you engaged, yet?" Silly sod.

Tonight I met Jacq off the 8:45 train from Leeds and we walked to the Crown at Yeadon. We did have quite a good evening. Didn't see Philip K. Carol Smith was in with her boyfriend, Trevor. Jacq and I propped up the bar and had three or four pints.

Alan Thompson, the EP film critic, was in with his hippy son. He told me he won't be on the Father's Day trip to Blackpool this year because he wants to keep his limbs intact for a little while longer. It was on the Father's Day trip in 1976 that Denis Haywood fell off the pier into the murky depths.

At 11 we walked back to Guiseley in a mild drizzle stopping at the bus shelter near Aireborough Grammar School in the hope that somebody would stop and pick us up, but no such luck.

Home at 12:15 and we read 'The Woman He Loved' by Ralph G. Martin. Yes, we both sat like Ryan O'Neal and Ally McGraw wrapped in one another's arms with our eyes riveted to the yellowing pages.

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Tuesday May 9, 1978

Sarah and I went to Parker's wine bar at lunchtime. Had a couple of pints and a glass of dry white wine. She is a giggle is Sarah, but the soul destroying infatuation which ruled my thoughts for years on end is now over. She is attractive, humorous and enchanting but a relationship would never get off the ground. We discuss quitting the YP.

Hot day. Christine phoned this afternoon to say she went out last night with a guy she met at the party on Saturday. She refers to herself as a 'bugger'. She flies off to Jersey on Wednesday with with Mum. Paddy Braithwaite died a year ago this month. I do suppose they'll be thinking about him all the more.

Items of news: Aldo Moro, the former Italian PM who was kidnapped 54 days ago was found dead today. Lord Hillingdon, of Williams & Glyn's Bank, is dead too. Margaret Hilda Thatcher and Mr Callagas have been squabbling about knocking off one solitary penny in the pound in Income Tax. Fools. The Queen is still wearing spectacles when reading in public.

Mum visited Dr Mellor this morning and he did nothing but talk about Dad and how marvellous the British police force is. In the surgery she chatted to a woman with a baby called Peter. The woman told her Peter is becoming popular again thanks to Princess Anne. I don't think so.

John came up to see Lynn and Dave about something. He told me Tony has moved to Shipley and is throwing a party there on Saturday. He and Maria are going. _____________________.

Bed at midnight.

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Thursday May 4, 1978

Ascension Day ~ Holy Thursday

A wet, deluged day. At 4pm I was in the predicament of having no transport (at least until a train at 5:17) and so Sarah ferried me to the polling station at Hawksworth where I cast my vote for Willie Hudson, the current Lord Mayor. The rain will ensure that the Conservatives are re-elected (Council elections).

At 5 we went back to Sarah's where we had haddock flan for tea with Delia and Granny Ireson. Bill Collis was in residence but he said very little. We discussed Llandudno (of all places) and he advised me never to venture into Wales, adding with emphasis: 'it isn't worth it.'

It is incredible just how incompatible Delia, Bill, Sarah and family are together.They'd all kill one another without a minutes hesitation if it wasn't for the fact it's so convenient for them to carry on under the same roof. ________.

Delia remains at the top of my favourite 'Ladies Over 45' list. From this lofty height she will never fall.

I cancelled a dental appointment scheduled for this evening to sample a slice of Delia's 'nice piece of haddock' (bought in case you're interested at Cowley's fishmongers in Headingley).

At 8, Sarah, Delia, Mrs Whittington (yes, "Turn again, Dick" and all that)went to the pub in Wetherby where we had a riot last September after the 'do' at Harewood House.

Home, very sober, at 11 to find the whole house in uproarious, drunken revelry. The Nasons, Edith & Ernest, David B's Uncle Tony (Baker) from Nigeria, and a very drunken Lynn.

Bed at 4am after listening to records using the headphones.

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Monday April 24, 1978

Up to Rawdon to see old Hough (dentist). As usual I need a couple of teeth filling and have to go back on May 4.

Sarah took me to Rawdon in Delia's car, which was good of her. I'm supposed to be going to tea with them both next week. Whether I shall or not depends on the movements of Mr W.A. Collis, because I'm never entertained there when he's lodging at home. He hates me.

Jacq started work today at Dacre, Son & Hartley. I phoned her tonight to see how things went. She says OK. The money is ghastly after London but that's the way things are. It's Dacre's dinner dance on Saturday and I'm accompanying Jacq. More expense!

We are going for a quick drink on Wednesday lunchtime, not before. She is attempting to manage my financial affairs. I have every intention of achieving solvency by August or September.

Sandy Denny, the singer, is dead.



Christine phoned. Goodnight.

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Monday March 27, 1978

Easter Monday

Bank Holiday (UK, except Scotland)

I fear that I'm the only person in the Kingdom going out to work today. The roads were barren and void of all life. The occasional raincoat-clad old age pensioner kept appearing on the horizon, but that was about all.

Just Sarah and I in the office. Completely dead. We had one phone call between 8:30 and 2pm, when I left.

I left Sarah reading the opera score of 'The Rape of Lucretia' by Britten. She's really into music since Mr MacMurray entered her world.

I walked in the sunshine to Kirkstall and then got a bus home. Spent the remainder of the afternoon sticking photos in Mama's album and then dined at 5 with Sue, Pete, Mum & Dad.

Chris

Christopher phoned at 6:15 to see if I fancied going out. I agreed.  He came up at 8 after dining with Denise at the Flying Pizza in Burley. We stayed for an hour or so in the Fox discussing the adventures of recent times. His 'affair' with Michelle is a weird one. I can't see why they bother. He says Pete M is moving to Otley in June but the Mather's are retaining Ty-Onnen (Bramhope) for holiday purposes. I'm glad because poor Vera (Mather) despises Thornton-le-Dale. I like Chris, but I'm always mindful of what my old grandma used to say: "never trust men with specs who live in Horsforth and work in banks". We went down to join Sue, Pete, Gus, Johnny and Chippy at the Shoulder of Mutton.




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