Wednesday December 24, 1980

 _. Christmas Eve. The annual Bacchanalian orgy took place at the YP. We finished everything in the office by 11 and then drank whisky and dry ginger with the girls and exchanged presents. The usual rigmarole. Ally phoned to say she'd collect me at 1. She arrived with Catherine Brook [such a Jane Austen character] and we went to Parker's to join Sarah, Carol J and Shazzo. After one drink we made our escape and went on to the Central with Shazzo in tow. Parker's, she says, is too posh for her. Everything became a little blurred. 

We met Pete Lazenby and at closing time he accompanied Ally, Catherine and I to Club Street where we indulged in more wine and we all sang heartily around the piano. Pete gave us a tremendous rendering of several of his monologues - 'Three Ha'pence a Foot' and 'Albert and the Lion', &c. He did not approve of us singing 'Land of Hope and Glory', and midway through this he disappeared to a butcher's shop to buy a leg of pork for his mother. We then took Catherine and a staggering Pete home. Home pissed.

Dressed and out at 8 to Hilda and Tony's Silver Wedding party at the Pudsey Civic Centre. I don't quite know how I kept going. Mama disapproved of my condition, and my staggering was something of a focal point. From the party we went on to Hilda's. I annoyed Uncle T by constantly asking whether Santa had been yet. 'No Michael. Not until you have been to sleep' was his reply. Home after 2am, and to bed.

-=-

Tuesday December 23, 1980

 _. More pay [a fortnight's money today because of the holidays]. To Ally's from the YP. Out to Mamma Mia's Pizzeria on Manningham Lane for a romantic nosh before returning to Guiseley at 8. Mum and Dad were miserable and so we left hurriedly for Lynn and Dave's where we sat watching TV. Ally gave me disapproving looks. We left at 11 and watched Walter Matthau in 'Pete 'n Tilly'.

-=-

Monday December 22, 1980

 _. Ally had another 'fuddle' at Mamma Mia's. I took an early lunch at 11 to avoid the crowds and bought a hanging basket for Ally, then returned to the office bemoaning a lack of finances.

The Press today is silent on Lady Diana, but a steady flow of photos from different agencies show that some organs of the media expect HM to announce Wales's engagement in her Christmas broadcast. Fools that they are.

Later Ally came to Pine Tops like Santa Claus bearing whisky and rum and we sat by a roaring TV with Mama and Papa.

Ally is such a little belter. Whatever did I do in the days before she appeared?

-=-

Sunday December 21, 1980

 _.4th Sunday in Advent

Day of recuperation. Ally and I watched 'The Wizard of Oz' on the BBC. Amazingly enough, she's never seen it. Judy Garland is horrible. I cannot see how 36 men happened to fall in love with her and marry her.

Question: Why is it that since visiting the dentist three weeks ago I've had nothing but trouble from a newly filled tooth which previous gave me nothing but loyal, painless service and selfless satisfaction? Could it be that Hough's successor is a butcher? Thinking now of Laurence Olivier attacking Dustin Hoffman in 'The Marathon Man'. Ghastly.

-=-

Saturday December 20, 1980

 _. To Bingley Christmas shopping this morning. 

Lazenby's party at Park Rd. Ally and I began at the New Inn, packed with juveniles covered in shaving foam and behaving like third formers. Come to think of it, I'm usually covered in shaving foam and behaving like a third former which means a) I'm getting old, b) I'm out of shaving foam, or c) I've stopped shaving.

Previously in the day Ally and I joined Mama and Papa at Sue and Pete's for drinks at West End Terrace. [I have made a hash of today's journal entry. It's all back to front and upside down].

Needless to say, Lazenby's party was tremendous. Not as packed as last year, but excellent all the same. Bob Schofield insisted on bringing his dog, and a huge joint of roast beef in garlic appeared. Ally was certain that an old friend of mine [who I only tend to see once a year on this festive night] is in fact the Yorkshire Ripper. Jack [the Ripper] has done for Yorkshire what Leonard Cheshire did for Nagasaki.

Home at almost 8am. Ally was exhausted, even tearful.

-=-

Friday December 19, 1980

 _. Over to Ally's at 6 and straight out to Mamma Mia's pizzeria on Manningham Lane for a naughty Italian dinner [naughty, owing to the fact we have little spare money, and Ally is writing cheques like no tomorrow]. After piping hot lasagne we went on to the Bod and then back to Rue Club for the night. Is Yuletide here?

-=-

Thursday December 18, 1980

 _. Pay day. To the Drop with Ally and then the New Inn where we 'accidentally' meet Sue, Audrey and the diminutive Christine. Quite boozed up. At home for 11. Jim and Margaret and Lynn [no Dave, he was out working] were making merry. Lynn expands daily. Spend hours persuading Mum and Dad to take a pub, but somehow I cannot see it coming off. Is Papa 'cut out' for the pub landlord role? Methinks he is far too argumentative and intolerant for such a vital PR existence.

-=-