Wednesday July 2, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

Sunshine. We went at 9:15 to St Edmund's Hall and North Leeds Prep School on Gledhow Lane to see a Mrs Lynch, who gave us a guided tour of her little school while Samuel played unperturbed in the nursery class. It was a good old fashioned school. Mrs Lynch walked us to the gate and patting Sam on the head said: "well, we'll see what we can do about getting you in." This will not happen until September, 1987. We'd like earlier. Back to the Moorhouse until 3:30. To Bradford where we all have our hair 'sorted'. Sam had to hold his Teddy Bear for his trim.

-=-

Tuesday July 1, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

Bank Holiday in Canada

Busy, frantic pub. Leslie Gledhill came in this evening when only Ally and I were in the bar and he stood quizzing us as to why we have suddenly become so popular. The taking are going up and up. We had a wedding anniversary party for Pat and Tony.

The Princess of Wales is 25 today. God bless her. 

Social: Lady Fairfax of Cameron gave birth to a son on Friday in London.

-=-

Monday June 30, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds, LS11 5NQ

Up bright and early. Liz in. For God's sake, I'm going to go on about the weather. People tend to do at times like this. After a cold start to the month, it has been the warmest second half of June over central England since 1976. During this month every kind of weather has been reported ranging from snow and hail and thunder to cloudless skies and temperatures reaching 90 degrees F. Over the five days from June 25 to June 29 the temperature in England was 8.8 degrees fahrenheit above average. The month started with a pretty gloomy day across most of Britain. It was muggy, misty and drizzly. Brighter weather spread from the north on the June 3rd ... Many areas had sunny spells but showers and a cold wind on northern and eastern coasts meant temperatures here were well below average. Cape Wrath in the north of Scotland failed to get warmer than 45 degrees all day on June 5.The next few days were variable. On June 9 it rained most of the day in parts of North West Scotland with mild afternoon temperatures... Continued on Page 94.

Lord Stockton is still not well. Crown Prince Frederik of Denmark has gone off to the Gobi Desert and mountains of Mongolia filming for Channel 4. He is 18.

-=-

Sunday June 29, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

5th Sunday after Trinity

Bessie phoned. Andrew and Lorraine are to live in un-marital bliss in a £29,000 maisonette at Eastleigh, Southampton, no bigger than a shoe box. Bessie and Frank are unhappy about them living in 'sin', but what can they do? She says she has bought them storage jars, buckets and bedding, just as if they were married. We did a buffet tonight for the lad from Lawrence House OAP residence. He always looks lost and dejected. He was no different tonight. My God, how dull some people are. Look back at some of my birthdays for instance - my 21st - we were so active and alcoholic. One large, over enthusiastic lady tipped a pint of beer over the head of a fellow guest. I was cross.

-=-

Saturday June 28, 1986

Ian and Jacq.

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

Our World Cup fancy dress party: a good gathering. No big crowd from Pudsey, except Marlene who was low and left early. Guests included John, Janette, George W, Jayne, Lynn, Dave B, Sue, Peter, Denise, Tony, MM, Marita, Jacq, Ian, &c. And at 11pm in came Sarah C and Trevor - most unexpected. Sarah is now a jogger. Coal carrying, &c. Jacq, dressed as a football referee, had hiccoughs. They were all gone at 1am leaving Ally and I with Bernie McC, Frank, Alan (Batey), and a couple called Sharon and Glyn. He is a building worker. Bed 3am.

Lord Stockton has been poorly - pneumonia. He is 92. Oh dear. The auction of the Lordship of the Manor of East Dummer, the home village of Sarah Ferguson, failed to find a buyer yesterday.

-=-

Friday June 27, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

Temperatures went over 90F today. Ally took Samuel to his cousin Ben's birthday barbeque at Guiseley. Today is our fifth wedding anniversary. At 2:50 I crept out with Jack Collett to the Junction (2 pints) and then to the New Canning WMC. Here I was allocated my own suite because the place was full of undesirables from our place whom I have blown out in the past 2 years. Very drunk. Joined by Copenhagen Willy  and his Fergie-like Mrs. Ally came back at 6. Customers plied me with white wine tonight and by 11:30pm I was doing my Basil Fawlty impersonation and generally causing a breach of the Queen's peace. Upstairs Ally was thoroughly disgusted.

Sue and Ben.

-==-

Thursday June 26, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

Ally to the clinic at 2:30. She has phoned some prep schools re Samuel entering at 3. 

The DT has a pic of Prince Andrew and Sarah Ferguson, walking arm in arm at Killyleagh, Northern Ireland. They are a loving, demonstrative pair. I feel that the prince will have to show her who is the boss.

Social news: Lady Romsey gave birth to a daughter yesterday, on what would have been the 86th birthday of Lord Mountbatten. Lady Louise, perhaps? Lady Rowena Montagu-Stuart-Wortley has become engaged to John R. Hunt.

-=-

Wednesday June 25, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

A health visitor went to Club St this afternoon to meet Ally. No doubt snooping to make sure we really do have a home in Bradford.

News: Prince Andrew and Sarah Ferguson paid a flying visit to Ulster. There's a pic in the DT of a heavily pregnant Princess Caroline of Monaco. She is due in August. Sir Frank Whittle has been appointed OM by HM.

-=-

Tuesday June 24, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

Stock take at 10am. A £30 deficit. No staff. Sir John Colville's book came in the post, and I flicked through the pages with great excitement.

Viscount Lowther, son of the Earl of Lonsdale, married Miss Angela Wyatt, daughter of Capt Peter Wyatt, RN (retired), on Saturday. I have to keep notes of these sort of things because my copy of Burke's Peerage is 30 years old.

-=-

Monday June 23, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

Brewery meeting at the Raynville in Bramley. Samuel went for tea to Karen and Steve's. He and Hayley are very compatible. Karen is so very much like Hilda. Back from the Raynville at 8:30. Fish & chips. Watch a vid of 'Pride and Prejudice', the Olivier version. Maureen and Liz were below and cleaning up and nattering until 11:20.

-=-

Sunday June 22, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

4th Sunday after Trinity

Maradona: hand ball .... or something.

Mags at lunch. Roast chicken. England was defeated by Argentina. A hand ball by Maradona, or something. Bev and Karin did PM. 

Yesterday we received an invitation to the wedding on August 9, of cousin Jacqueline and Barry Raistrick. Startled. We want to go but what about baby? Jacqueline was born on August 9, 1956.

Prince Edward has passed his final history exams at Cambridge University and has been awarded a Class II, Division II degree. 'Highly respectable', says the university. I predict that one day Prince Edward will be Duke of Cambridge.

-=-

Saturday June 21, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

Longest Day

Fox & Hounds, Starbotton

Prince William of Wales is four. We went out at 4pm to Hilda's where she has Hayley and Thomas for the afternoon. Samuel played with Hayley digging up Tony's flower beds and dropping bricks into the ornamental pond. ______. Hilda offered to have Samuel if Ally should have to go suddenly to hospital, and if we have no other babysitters. In the post we received details of the pub at Starbotton. It's on the market for £160,000. Over priced, but Ally phoned Frank to enquire about loans, and he quipped that one day we will have all the money we need, i.e. when he's dead, which Ally found morbid and not in the least bit helpful.

-=-

Friday June 20, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

That demure Danish girl the Duchess of Gloucester is 40 today. In another, less tranquil wing of Kensington Palace, more bother from Princess Michael of Kent, who announced yesterday in a published notice that she and Prince Michael would be attending Roya Ascot. This broke protocol because attendance at Royal Ascot is a private engagement. Poor Marie-Christine.

Janette phoned this morning with her wedding plans. It is the Yorkshire Rose, as mentioned by Dad the other day. She says her mother is now to boycott the marriage because it's taking place on English soil. 

I went through my address book and invited people to a fancy dress "When England Win the World Cup" party for next Friday, no Saturday June 28. I spoke to Sarah Collis, who was at Delia's. She says she will come but I cannot bring myself to believe this.

-=-

Thursday June 19, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds, LS11 5NQ

Shibden Hall.

Mum and Dad married 32 years ago today. So sad. Day off in Bradford. Ally had a scan at 9:30 and Samuel and I went in for the performance. Pictures of the baby flashed on a screen but I could make nothing of them. The midwife says baby has its head down and is all in place and looking good. Afterwards we had a drive out and ended up at Shibden Hall, near Halifax, where Samuel bounced on a 'jumping castle' and then we went on a miniature train , walked round the lake, ate ice-creams, &c. Very pleasant. I know Shibden Hall from old, but had quite forgotten about the place. Had a pizza in town at Giuseppe's Backyard.

News: The Kents attended the Channon funeral yesterday. A baby Bowes Lyon and future Earl of Strathmore has been born to Lady Glamis, who is a sister of Mrs Nicholas Soames. Pool match here.

-=-

Wednesday June 18, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds, LS11 5NQ

Waterloo, 1815. Jennie Rawnsley, 1969. LG came in and grimly announced that I have missed this years bonus by a fraction. Trade didn't pick up until the beginning of May - too late to save me apparently. Phoned Dad. He says Hilda has phoned him to say she's heard from John and Janette re the wedding plans and that they are having the reception at the Yorkshire Rose, Guiseley. It's news to us. Dad wants to go to Lanzarote with Arnold and may even be away for his sons nuptials. 

The Queen met Mrs Barrantes in the Royal Enclosure at Ascot yesterday. Major Ferguson was injured while playing polo when an opponent's stick broke giving the him a gash on the forehead. At Ascots all the ladies were in spots.

-=-

Tuesday June 17, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds, LS11 5NQ

Royal Ascot. Lady Diana Cooper has shook a seven. She only survived her old friend the Duchess of Windsor by a few weeks. Lord Althorp has gone on TV-AM to make an anti-drugs plea following the death of his friend Olivia Channon. Evidently, he saw Miss Channon on the day before her untimely death. "Champagne" Charlie Althorp has a 'fast' reputation, I fear. Susan Barrantes has flown in for next month's wedding with her Argentinian polo playing husband, who is also a guest. Hugh Montgomery-Massingberd writes in the DT on the subject of Prince Andrew's surname and whether or not he'll use the Mountbatten-Windsor appelation on his marriage certificate. Charles didn't. Anne did. The name should not come into use until Andrew has a grandson in the male line. Will I be here?

-=-

Monday June 16, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

Hot. Summer's here. Yesterday was the hottest day of the year. 81F in London. Bill Foggitt says we will enjoy good weather for the rest of June based on the high activity of ants in the gardens. 

Duke of Kent: KG

Samantha has a middle name. It's Kay. They picked it out of the blue.  This afternoon we walked up to the nursery school or kindergarten thing on Hunslet Hall Road where we were told Samuel is no nearer getting a place. One would think it was Millfield. Sod them. Bessie phoned. 

News: the Duke of Kent was installed at St George's Chapel as a KG wearing the robes that belonged to his father and have been packed away in a box for half a century. Prince George was appointed to the order in 1923 on his 21st birthday, but his son has had to wait until he is 50. Prince Andrew and Sarah Ferguson attended the wedding on Saturday of the Hon Peter Pleydell-Bouverie, son of the Earl of Radnor, to Jane Gilmour, daughter of Sir Ian Gilmour, and a descendant of the ducal Abercorns, from whom Fergie and Diana also stem.

-=-

Sunday June 15, 1986

  Moorhouse Inn, Leeds, LS11 5NQ

3rd Sunday after Trinity

Father's Day

Up for my Sunday papers and sat over breakfast reading about the Prince of Wales who has expressed serious concern about the discrimination against blacks in the Guards regiments and the Household Cavalry. ___________. Dad moved on. We went to Sue's and drank beer in the garden. Jim and Margaret are queer. They took the boys on the moor at Burley Woodhead leaving Sam wit us. Busy tonight. We took £400. It was Father's Day.

-=-

Saturday June 14, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

The Queen's Official Birthday.

Twooping the Colour. Sunshine. That old horse called Burmese. Fergie. What joy. Ian MacGregor is knighted. Bill Deedes of Private Eye's 'Dear Bill' is a peer. Thank God Dad was here. Samuel is devoted to his grandad and off they went to the park. Fergie on the front page of the DT watching the tennis at Queen's Club where Boris Becker was beaten 6-7, 7-6, 6-2, by Tim Mayotte.

-=-

Friday June 13, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds, LS11 5NQ

Hectic. A retirement buffet at 12:15 for 50 folk or so. Very successful. Kenmar came and removed the fruit machines and in came Bell Fruit. The papers are full of Olivia Channon. Sex and drugs and rock and roll. Dad stayed today and was invaluable. He is staying on tomorrow when Margaret Young's 21st bash will dominate our tap room.

-=-

Thursday June 12, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

Fox & Hounds, Starbotton.

Ally to the clinic and me to Dr York re my allergies. He is not happy about the effectiveness of injections (50/50) and yet he is sending me to the BRI to see a specialist. Once allergic to animals, always allergic to animals, he says. We spent the morning at Club Street. At lunchtime we went to Starbotton, where the pub is for sale for £160,000. Dad phoned from the Moorhouse where he had landed on impulse and was in the bar nattering with Audrey and Ann (Wilkinson). We came back to join him and had a few drinks together.

Olivia Channon, daughter of Paul Channon and a Guinness heiress, has been found dead at university. Her step-brother recently became engaged to a Rivett-Carnac from Martyr Worthy.

-=-

Wednesday June 11, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds, LS11 5NQ

The Bakers flew to Majorca yesterday for 2 weeks. Here: World Cup - England 3 v. Poland 0.

The Duke of Edinburgh became an OAP yesterday. Bus pass, &c. And on June 9 the Queen Mother attained the great age of 85 years and 304 days, and became the oldest lady to have been the Queen Consort, and indeed she is already older than our oldest sovereign (Queen Vic) by 4 years. The Queen Mother has now surpassed Queen Mary in age.

-=-

Tuesday June 10, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

Beverley Wilson, 19 today, called in at 3pm in response to the birthday card I despatched to her. She is to have her job back. She has argued with Peter _____________. Oh dear. She starts on Sunday. LG came in 8 to 8:30 and was joviality itself. Poor Samuel still sick. It is announced that Bob Geldof is to become KBE, but won't be 'Sir Bob' because of his Éire nationality. Over the top, I think, but a popular gesture. It will please the masses.

-=-

Monday June 9, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

Took Samuel at 12 to see a doctor who didn't seem worried and sent us away with some powder for his tummy. Poor little mite. He is so rarely ill and has been knocked for a six. John and Janette came back at 8 looking subdued after the events on Saturday night. They say that Jayne Waite will now provide the wedding buffet even before I had the chance to cancel the buffet here. John had £600 in his wallet intended for me. _________. John had Jack Collett in hysterics discussing John's plans for a four-day orgy in Majorca for the stag party.

-=-

Sunday June 8, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

2nd Sunday after Trinity

Over to Guiseley this afternoon to sit in the garden with Lynn and Sue. Discuss the events of last night. ______. We left hurriedly at tea time when Samuel was taken violently ill. Vomit everywhere. Poor boy. Ally had a terrible night with him. Vomit all over his bed, &c.

-=-

Saturday June 7, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

New Moon

Ally went to her dentist at Shipley for 10am taking Samuel along. He sat as quiet as a mouse in the room as the white coated Mr Roberts (?) probed around in his mother's mouth. It was a shameful evening. Janette phoned to say they would be coming across to discuss the forthcoming wedding and Ally and I waited all night. Sure enough John and Janette came in with George and Jayne at 10:30. After closing we sat in the tap room where the plan emerged that they want 70 guests here for champagne and smoked salmon, guests including ________________. We blew up. No way am I entertaining that cow in my home. I explained it wasn't the done thing.

(The evening ended in chaos and ill -will. I say things about living people not suitable for publication).

-=-

Friday June 6, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

Poor Ally. What a dreadful time she has had with this baby. For months now I have been up before her, often grumpily and grudgingly to bring her some morsel of food to bed to try and quel her nausea. She is large, and stretched. My God, the things we inflict upon our loved ones.

Lt.-Col. Sir Peter Farquhar, 6th Baronet, has kicked the bucket along with David Colville (see Colville of Culross), a brother of Sir John Colville, whose 1939-55 diaries I am desperate to read. I believe Ally has ordered the volume from our book club.

-=-

Thursday June 5, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

I am very worried about my appearance. The FLAB, it hangs over my trousers in a disgusting paunch. It is the sort of thing I laughed at in others in my more slim-line years but now I am a leading candidate in the Cyril Smith stakes. My face is round too, hideously so that my chin has now merged into my neck. Oh God. See in the Daily Telegraph that speculation is rife re the forthcoming honour for Bob Geldof. They suggest the OBE. Jimmy Savile received this award for raising £10m for Stoke Mandeville hospital ten years or so ago. We'll see.

-=-

Wednesday June 4, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds, LS11 5NQ

Mummy Dixon's birthday. She's in deepest Italy. Derby Day. The race was won by the Aga Khan. The Princess of Wales wore polka dots and looked chic. It was also the unveiling of Sarah Ferguson - the future Princess Andrew. Let me say this. The Birthday honours next week coud see the announcement of Andrew's elevation to the dukedom of York. The two previous dukes of York were so created in the birthday honours of 1892 and 1920. Prince Philip was gazetted a duke on the morning of his marriage in November, 1947. However, the Queen took over 6 years to create Charles Prince of Wales. And Anne has yet to be designated Princess Royal despite the title being available since 1965.

-=-

Tuesday June 3, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

No staff. England played Portugal. It's the World Cup, you know. Mother loved football. Fish and Chips at 11pm. 

Earth shattering news: Dame Anna Neagle keeled over and died today, aged 81. "Victoria the Great" and all that.

Anna Neagle, DBE, an Ode

Anna Neagle,

Doyen of the West End stage,

In your prime you were all the rage,

Your name wasn't really Neagle,

It was Marjorie Robertson,

But Neagle rhymes with seagull.

Oh yes. One of the 'Norfolk Broads' Lady Mary Fitzalan Howard has married Anthony Mumford. She is forty at least and a lady-in-waiting to Princess Alexandra, and 'heiress'
to the Herries lordship.

-=-

Monday June 2, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

Temple Newsam: Jacobean erection.

The Queen was crowned and anointed, 1953. LG came for a sample of the cloudy ale left below by Tiny Tim, the relief manager. He seemed unconcerned. Sunshine. We escaped this afternoon to Temple Newsam, where we looked at the pigs feeding and inspected the azaleas. I had forgotten just how big pigs can be. The sight must have been quite frightening for Sammy. The gardens are beautiful. Sammy attacked a small girl in front of the Jacobean erection and made off with her new dolly. No staff tonight. I phoned Dad.

Todays news: Princess Margaret is fully recovered. Lord Apsley has married Miss Hilary George. The royal wedding souvenir programme has been launched by Lord Airlie. Lord Borthwick has successfully claimed the right to his ancient Scottish peerage. Deceased: Lord Willoughby de Broke, Lord Hothfield, Sir Brooke Boothby, Bt.

-=-

Sunday June 1, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

1st Sunday after Trinity

Alan, Frank & Bernie.

Ally furious at my late night. She was not party to it and I was at fault for not going up at frequent intervals to see my poor, pregnant Pig. Ally stayed abed all day doing her Madame Du Barry routine. Bev phoned at 11:58am to say she cannot work this lunchtime following a row with Uncle P. Oh dear. Hellish night. The McCarrons were giving it big licks. A large Irish contingent. Bernie and Frank go to Italy for a week from today. Milan, I think. That man Richard Branson, with the teeth and lots of cash, has been appointed by the PM to lead the war against litter. We are a disgusting race for litter. One goes to Europe and one is made immediately aware of the cleanliness. Princess Margaret has a severe throat infection. It's the ciggies.

-=-

Saturday May 31, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

Denise and Marita.

Battle of Jutland 1916. Birth of Terry Egan 1936. 

To market at dawn. Brisket for lunch. Ally sleepy. The Daily Telegraph says this spring has been the coldest since 1979.  (see attached). It was a busy night when at 9:30 in walked MM, Marita, Denise, Tony Barker, &c. My first encounter with TB, a personable bloke. Denise very sleek. I spent the whole night until 3am demolishing the character of __________, whom Denise worships. Denise defends him to the last. ___________.

-=-

Friday May 30, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds, LS11 5NQ

Chernobyl.

I have had a terrible heart breaking conversation with Dad. Last month a nuclear power station blew up at Chernobyl in the USSR sending clouds of radiation up into the atmosphere and clouds of cancerous filth has blown over towards northern Europe. Anyway, with this in mind, Dad walked out into the rain and climbed to a high peak, and facing the heavens willed this evil radiation upon himself. How pathetic. He just wants to go join mother. Today is the anniversary of the frying of Joan of Arc in 1431. Social: the Marchioness of Reading gave birth to a son on Monday, and Lady Aberdour a son on Wednesday. Sir Francis Lowe, 3rd Baronet, has died at Cowes, aged 55.

-=-

Thursday May 29, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

Ally to Dr Duck who booked her in for a further scan at BRI, but otherwise Duck is not concerned. The baby seems to have been with us for an eternity. Bless him/her. Beverley worked tonight and Uncle Peter came over for her. Some swine has vandalised the sanitary towel machine in the ladies. No doubt to get the cash. 

Today is Oak Apple Day - the anniversary of the restoration of Charles II in 1660. It's also the anniversary of the fall of Constantinople in 1453. 

Swaziland's new teenage King Mswati III has dissolved parliament in Liqoqo. No reason was given. That's teenagers for you.

The Hon Colin Orr-Ewing has married. Borislav Milić, the Yugoslav chess player has shuffled off his mortal coil.

-=-

Wednesday May 28, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

Back to the Moorhouse where we have a £60 surplus, after last weeks £80 deficit. The relief manager Tiny Tim went off in a hurry leaving me with cloudy ale long faces in the bar. I immediately phoned LG to disassociate myself from the contents of my cellar. He thinks I am going over the top but after last years carry on naturally I'm wary. Tonight, Geoff, Alan, Terry (cockney) and Karin and self went to the Station pub on Hillidge Rd, Hunslet, for the quiz. What an earnest person John, the incumbent landlord, is. Horribly pissed and home crossing the moor with Alan. Earnest John believes in drinking after time.

-=-

Tuesday May 27, 1986

 5 Club Street, Lidget Green, Bradford BD7 2PB

Wind. To Haworth to see the Worth Valley puffa trains. Samuel was beside himself at all the noise and steam. We sat on a platform with all the railway buffs who were snapping away with cameras. Visited a garden centre and then took lunch in a pub surrounded by Japanese tourist types. We had chicken pie and rock-hard peas. Not good at all. I was so proud of Samuel who didn't make a noise and acted very grown up. Home to sirloin and 'Emmerdale Farm'. Ally bushed.

-=-

Monday May 26, 1986

Waltergarth Station Rd, Horton-in-Ribblesdale BD24 OHH

Bank Holiday in UK

Samuel at Club St.

Cousin Reg's twins are one today. We left Horton and went to Glusburn in search of Judith Brown, nee Rushworth. Ally drove first to Gisburn by mistake. We came across a Horton-in-Craven, close to Foulridge, where Ally has some family roots. At Glusburn we were disappointed. The Browns left last September. We sat outside and had Yorkshire pudding. Draughty. On to Guiseley and Sue's where we sat in the garden drinking thick Cinzano. Back at Club St we had pizza from the take-away. Watched a James Bond film. You know, the one with crocodiles.

-=-

Sunday May 25, 1986

 5 Club Street, Lidget Green, Bradord BD7 2PB

Ally at Kettlewell.

Picnic in the Dales then on to Dad's via Buckden and Kettlewell, &c. A lovely day. We found the Bakers with Dad. I cannot be happy at Waltergarth. I constantly think of that day last year. Lynn and Dave left after tea and we decided to stay the night. Dad promptly turning away walkers who would have stayed for B & B. This upset us. We were depriving him of his livelihood. Dad and I went out for a pint at 9:30 and Ally went to bed with a book. I toasted 'absent friends' and it was an emotional moment. Theakston's ale and whisky in abundance. The Crown would be a nice bolt hole wouldn't it, eh?

-=-

Saturday May 24, 1986

 5 Club Street, Lidget Green, Bradford BD7 2PB

Lister Park, Manningham.

A domestic sort of day. I papered the bathroom, &c. To Manningham Park with Samuel, who loved it. The slide there - Oh what a joy. Ice creams around the lake. He loved the waterfall. People do not appreciate parks anymore, do they? Tonight. Trout. Exquisite. Ally went up to clean up after my decorating, and I watched the lovely Tracy-Louise Ward on the telly. She's the girlfriend of Bunter Worcester, the Duke of Beaufort's heir, and sister of Rachel Ward, both nieces of Lord Dudley.

-=-

Friday May 23, 1986

 5, Club Street, Lidget Green, Bradford BD7 2PB

A day near home. To the Prune Park Inn, not a nice place, and so we moved on to the Gaping Goose Inn, which was quiet, but we arrived in the midst of a crisis, and we sat gawping over lunch, watching the manager being sacked. The place was crawling with personnel from Webster's brewery. Onwards at 2:30 to MM and Marita's shop where we sat all afternoon. Very relaxing company they are. Home to Bradford wilting. The joys of home life.

-=-

Thursday May 22, 1986

5 Club Street, Lidget Green, Bradford BD7 2PB

Brighter. To Whitby and Robin Hood's Bay in our little car with packs of sandwiches and biscuits. We took the scenic route up through Knaresborough, Sutton Bank, and Goathland Moor, the scene of many happy family picnics 1967-72. Caught in a downpour at Whitby. Samuel had his first candy floss in one of those much graffiti-daubed pensioners shelters. His little face on seeing the vast ocean was a sight to behold. Tea was taken at Robin Hood's Bay. Much dilapidation. Samuel was caught short and he proceeded to urinate in a café - all jam doughnuts, scalding tea, and clouds of yellow steam. Home all pink and weather-beaten, via Follifoot and the Radcliffe Arms where we sat outside annoying three black retrievers. No doubt about it Sam would love a dog. I would have to be de-allergised.

-=-

Wednesday May 21, 1986

 5 Club Street, Lidget Green, Bradford BD7 2PB

My own precious Ally Pig is 28 today. Rain. We went to York after breakfast in our little haven and walked around the shops, much to Sam's chagrin. He becomes quite evil in shopping precincts. Ally, all bulbous and blue, was well wrapped against the damp. Home at tea time exhausted. The fresh air has floored her. Laze around. Ate chocolate and watched a re-run of 'Edward and Mrs Simpson' on ITV. Dreadful.

-=-

Tuesday May 20, 1986

5 Club St, Bradford BD7 2PB

Hip Hip Hurray. Hols here. The holiday stocktake left us £80 down but we went to Club Street unmoved and unconcerned. I have given up with stock takers. Our relief manager is a Tim Suttenstall, or something. We went to Club St in a state of mental and physical exhaustion. Fish and chips. A new book as arrived from our book club. Debrett's Book of the Royal Engagement. Fascinating. Fergie isn't my cup of tea, but her pedigree is something else. I'm no snob, of course. I do love lineage. She can trace 14 generations back in the female line, daughter to mother, to grandmother, &c, compared with five or six for the Princess of Wales and a similar number in the direct female lineage of HM the Queen. To Sainsbury's. Sam was horribly behaved in the shop. Torrential rain. 

-=-

Monday May 19, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

Sunshine. At 2:30 I accidentally buggered up the till locking all the money inside and incapacitating the business of my public house. I phoned Yorkshire Cash Registers who sent someone out to get us up and running again at 5:30. A slight panic.

-=-

Sunday May 18, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

Whit Sunday

Sue is fine. They operated, found nothing and so stuck her together again. That's what they have told us. A day filled with horrible memories. To the cemetery this morning with a bag of peat and a spade. Tidied around. The flowers there are all spectacular and the little corner looked beautiful. To Club St in the afternoon. Dad stayed up at Horton. He told Lynn he didn't see today as an anniversary to go to the grave, as it was a day of no importance to him or to Mum in the years before.

-=-

Saturday May 17, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

I opened up at 11. Lynn phoned to say Sue is back in hospital. A wet day. We arranged with Lynn to go to Club Street at 3. We met there and David installed the festoon blind in Sam's room. They are going on to see Sue this evening and we handed over some presents - just chocs, magazines and some wilting daffs. Dad is very worried.________. 

-=-

Friday May 16, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

Susan is poorly. __________. We phoned and she was stoic as ever. A little brick. 

-=-

Thursday May 15, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

Zara Phillips is 5. Lady Joanna du Breuil (sic) daughter of Countess Mountbatten of Burma has named her infant daughter after the Caribbean island owned by the Knatchbulls. I've forgotten the name. It's a good job she wasn't brought into the world in Scunthorpe. Ally suggests that the child must have been conceived on the island. Lady Pamela (Hicks) named her daughter India in honour of Dickie's viceroy connection.

Ally to the clinic.

( The Caribbean island is Eleuthera) 

-=-

Wednesday May 14, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

We are in a quandary about the name of our unborn child if male. A girl will be Clementine Nora Levinyer Rhodes ..... but, a boy ....? George, Frederick, William, and yes old Joshua has re-emerged after three years on the list. Joshua Michael Albert perhaps. Ally will not even consider it (the name) and has asked for a delay. I like to have these things nicely tied up beforehand.

-=-

Tuesday May 13, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

Club Street. Mother's cousin Elsie Basham died at the end of Feb. Have I already informed you of this? Please delete where applicable. I have been on the bathroom scales and quivering in horror at my reflection. I weigh 13 stones. My eyes droop with heavy bags. I stoop. I look mid-thirties and (indecipherable) . Gone is that buoyant, zestful youth. And to think you have have watched my decline here without even a word of warning. I thought you were my friends.

-=-

Monday May 12, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

Coronation Day 1937. I suppose that now only the Queen Mother can remember this.

We are in the week of that awful anniversary. God knows how we've all lived through the 12 months without her. She had that magical exuberance that dominated every gathering. 

-=-

Sunday May 11, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

Sunday after Ascension

Mother's Day USA & Canada

We went over to Club Street to continue decorating. John and Janette came late with JPH and Charlotte (Catherine is at a party). They had lunched at Mother Hubbard's and the bath panel for us on John's roof rack had snapped on Hollins Hill. John and I upstairs. Downstairs Janette told Ally that she had recently squabbled with Lynn. Dad being the topic of the argument. ___________.

-=-

Saturday May 10, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

Karen and Steve appeared tonight, at 7pm. Steve never changes. We expected a pregnancy announcement but were told the opposite.

-=-

Friday May 9, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

Two parliamentary by-election misses for the government. I am not in the least bit surprised. Re the royal wedding. Have I become somewhat lethargic on this topic? Pages and bridesmaids have been announced, &c, and following the precedent of the 1981 wedding all are godchildren or infants.

Peter & Zara Phillips, Lady Rosanagh Innes-Ker, Andrew Ferguson, Alice Ferguson, Seamus Makim, Laura Fellowes and Prince William of Wales, himself. Lady Rosanagh is a daughter of the Roxburghes, of Floors Castle, where Prince Andrew allegedly got down on one knee in February to propose to Miss F. The Duchess of Roxburghe was a Grosvenor.

-=-

Thursday May 8, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

Ascension Day

Horse & Jockey.

New Moon

Back to the Horse and Jockey at Ossett to return the Diet Pils. Ally weary. It was polling day in Leeds. This afternoon Samuel and I walked over to the school where we went behind the screen together and made a cross on the ballot paper for the ill-fated double barrelled Tory candidate. Ally stayed home with her feet up and she asked me to vote on her behalf. I explained that the rudiments of our democracy prevents this.

-=-

Wednesday May 7, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

Rain. The Princess of Wales fainted somewhere in the colonies and everyone on Fleet Street say that a). she is pregnant, or b). she is dying over exhaustion caused by over work, or c). the anorexia nervosa is back. It is almost silly season. The Daily Star of course says she is a, b and c. 

Afternoon off 3 until 7. Watched "Eye of the Needle" with Donald Sutherland. We saw it years ago with Lynn and Dave. No staff. Just Pet and myself.

-=-

Tuesday May 6, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

Edward VII died in 1910, and Princess Margaret married that little photographer named after a Welsh peak, 1960 &c. Warm. A day off of sorts. The rush yesterday means we have to go to Tadcaster today for beer. Samuel's dream came true and for a few hours he was a drayman. On to Club St - decorating. Sam, still in drayman mode, spilled a tin of white emulsion over our green carpet and for a few minutes it was like Hell on earth. Ally, heavily laden, on all fours scooping up hand fulls of paint. John, sombre, came to tile the bathroom. Lord Shinwell is about to die.

-=-

Monday May 5, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

Rain. Bank Holiday. To Guiseley this afternoon to see Susie and Samantha who is only to have the one forename. She is following the precedent set by mother who gave the boys two names and the girls only one. The boys all fell upon her with bear hugs and kisses. The poor little bugger (Samantha) will have to grow tough or die. Like the boy named Sue in the song by Johnny Cash.

-=-

Sunday May 4, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

Rogation Sunday

Yorke Arms.

Up to the Dales at lunch where Frank bought us lunch at the pub in Ramsgill. Frank is always munificent with his lunches. Lamb. Samuel was slightly over-boisterous with his cutlery. Home, tired at 4. Frank and Bessie left for home almost tearful. John and Janette came this evening.

-=-

Saturday May 3, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn Leeds LS11 5NQ

Overcast. To Ossett for a nine gallon of pils from the Horse & Jockey. They are supping with a vengeance here. Frank took us in his car. Later to the Harewood Arms for a pub lunch. Samuel looked angelic and the waitress addressed him as a little girl 18 times, even after we'd said he is a boy called Samuel. Silly cow. A passable meal. On to Otley to see Susan and the baby. She is so tiny and unlike the others. Dad was there and in the Doldrums. David and I took the vast gathering of children into the grounds. He confided in me that he is still fertile and despite the vasectomy he continues to fire live ammunition. I almost fell over an ambulance. Salmon sandwiches and Agatha Christie tonight. Cosy.

-=-

Friday May 2, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

The phone trilled at 7:30am. It was Sue to say she had been delivered of a daughter, Samantha, at 6:40am. We are thrilled, and a little peeved that Dad or Lynn hadn't bothered to tell us she had gone into Otley hospital yesterday. Thank God they have had a daughter at long last. It was a perfectly normal birth. We can go over to see them tomorrow. Hot. Busy pub. Frank and Bessie arrived here at 8pm laden with gifts. We all had a gin and tonic and Samuel stayed up to see them and was deliciously well behaved plodding around in his pyjamas. Our lager supply is going to run out, and I will have to get an emergency supply from somewhere. I got a one and a half litre of Dry Martini from the Junction.

-=-

Thursday May 1, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

May Day. Lady Sarah Armstrong-Jones is 22. Carol Johnson (who?) is 33. The lads from the Craven Gate came here. Pool Knockout. They linger over every shot like some of the boring professional snooker millionaires. How serious these sportsmen are. They played until 11:30. Ally took to her bed before the thrilling sporting climax.

-=-

Wednesday April 30, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

Leslie Gledhill came this evening to moan about our takings. The slump in barrelage, &c. "Do you want a move?" he asked. Is it perhaps our personalities that have turned our tap room into a mausoleum? We mentioned that we liked the Menston Arms and he raised his eyes to the heavens. The pub will be much sought after next year and will not be handed to us on a plate. We opened and up and I think said too much. Other less aesthetic managers would have told LG to fuck off. Tonight the quiz team from the Albion at Wakefield came here. Unbelievably, we won. Of course I was in the quiz team.

-=-

Tuesday April 29, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

Queen Mother: winsome smile.

Dad went home via Guiseley. Poor man. We took Samuel to see Dr Smith re his tongue. He seems to have trouble with it these days and that tiny strand of gristle annoys him. The doc says no treatment is required unless he begins to talk peculiarly, and in Leeds the snip is rarely carried out. It is a family thing. The midwife snipped my tongue with a pair of kitchen scissors. That was 31 years ago. It is Jill's birthday but we couldn't post a card because of some tiresome postal dispute. Next year perhaps. The Duchess of Windsor was planted at Frogmore this afternoon. The Queen Mother couldn't contain that lovely winsome smile as she stood on the steps of St George's Chapel. She cannot forgive Wallis Simpson. But if you ask me old Wallis did us a great favour taking away that silly man. George VI made a much better King.

-=-

Monday April 28, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

Dad came here at lunchtime looking quite chirpy, but wearing such drab clothes. Mum would have called them his 'playing out' clothes and she wouldn't have been happy to see him visiting us wearing such apparel. Upstairs when just about to go down who should walk in but Marlene and Frank. They haven't been for ages. They are taking Mabel up to Horton for a few days on Wednesday. I do hope it won't be all doom and gloom and Biblical. The dear Harwoods left at 2 and we splashed in the bath and clad ourselves in posh gear and went to Bramley - the Raynville Hotel - for our quarterly slap on the wrists and kick in the shins from L. Gledhill . We went after Samuel's tea at 5:30.

-=-

Sunday April 27, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

4th Sunday after Easter

Day off. To Club St. I spent the day undercoating, rubbing down, scratching and sweating. All a change from pulling beer. Ally made a corned beef hash. Bev worked this afternoon with Mags and at 6pm, very tired and weak, I called at Margaret's for the pub keys. Feel frozen and shivery. Not a soddin' cold, surely? Hot bath. Slumbered on the settee with Miss Marple and Mastermind on the TV. Went down at about 9:30 to see Uncle Peter and Jean. Karin and Bev worked. Poor Jean was told by a doc on Monday to stop smoking completely otherwise he might have no alternative but to amputate her legs! This seems a little drastic. We decided, midst laughter, that perhaps she should cut down to about 20 cigs a day and just have one leg off! Oh dear.

-=-

Saturday April 26, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn Leeds LS11 5NQ

Busy and warm. the outside tables come out. Karin worked lunch alone. V. capable. Jacq and Ian came with the proofs of their wedding photos and had a few drinks. Majorca was balmy. A warm Spring afternoon. At 4 we went over to Guiseley and placed a few pansies on Mum's grave. The daffodils are up and bobbing around all over the cemetery. It's almost a year now. I am rendered quite speechless and with a burning anger. It's never a feeling of sadness. Just bloody anger. Margaret in tonight. Stone dead. Jim Precious has a rash. Where's my surgical mask?

-=-

Friday April 25, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

Great quarrels in the pub about the Duchess of Windsor. Some sneer at the hypocrisy of letting the old girl rest at Windsor when, for 50 years, she was denied sanctuary within the castle walls. Utter rubbish. Others go so far as to say that in death she should be created HRH. What hypocrisy is that? Clever people at Burke's Peerage say that being the wife of HRH The Prince Edward, Duke of Windsor she was from 1936 HRH The Princess Edward, Duchess of Windsor anyway. Not so. The King, fount of all honour, can do anything and he denied this style to the Duchess and no amount of legal banter and letters to the editor can detract from this. Sarah Ferguson will become an HRH in July because the sovereign so wishes it. 

-=-

Thursday April 24, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

The Duchess of Windsor died this morning in Paris aged 89 and probably hasn't gone to Heaven. Years ago, in a rare flash of romantic foppery before I adopted a more serious mask, I harboured strong feelings of affection for Edward VIII and Mrs Simpson. Not now. However, she did us a great favour. She jettisoned George VI and dear Elizabeth  to the throne sparing us the many embarrassments that "Darling David" would have given us. Wallis is to be buried at Frogmore next Tuesday and the tabloids are speculating as to whether Di will now get the priceless emeralds, &c. 

-=-

Wednesday April 23, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

St George's Day

Stocktake. The bearded twit came and gave us a £40 deficit but we don't worry. It is 40 days since the last stocktake. What's £1 a day?

Recent stiffs: Glubb Pasha; the Earl of Haddington, KT; Sir William and Lady Fellowes; Dickie Henderson, OBE; Morecambe and Wise, OBE; John Lennon, MBE. Oh, go away, Michael.

-=-

Tuesday April 22, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

Ally is washed out. The newspapers are full of royal trivia. A birthday is always a good excuse for the rags to fill 500 pages with old pictures of HM. The Daily Star has a centre spread "60 things you didn't know about the Queen", and the only reason we do not know them is that some journo in an office has sat with a typewriter and made them all up. Despite my misplaced cynicism I do think that the Queen is more popular today than at any time in her life. Most of us cannot remember any other sovereign. Charles would be unthinkable at the moment even though his princess is beautiful and photogenic. Give me Elizabeth II any day. The King of Spain is here in State. A banquet at Windsor. Of course Juan Carlos and Sofia are close family of our royals and so it's a cosy family occasion.

-=-

Monday April 21, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

The Birthday of Queen Elizabeth II

Waltergarth.

Over to Guiseley for 9:30 and found Sue ready and waiting. Her washing blowing on the clothes line. A bright, blustery day. We arrived at Dad's at about 11, but by this time we had drizzle. Dad is so morose. It's difficult to have any conversation with him. He has lost interest in the children  and looks utterly finished. Neighbour Frances called in. We watched TV and although Dad doesn't approve of daytime viewing we insisted because it is the Queen's birthday and the media has gone to town. Daffodil waving schoolchildren singing on the Mall, &c. Andrew and Fergie on the balcony at Buck House. Later a service at St George's and tonight - when we were back at Club St - an appreciation of HM by Ludovic Kennedy and a gala at Covent Garden. Phew. We are knackered after our exertions and had a Chinese take-away tonight. Returned here at 12. We left Dad's at 10 by which time everyone was hysterical. Poor Dad. His reason for living is gone.

-=-

Sunday April 20, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

3rd Sunday after Easter

Very quiet. Bev worked 12-2. Later we took Bev to Pudsey dropping her off on Richardshaw Lane, and then went on to Guiseley. Looked at Lynn's festoon blinds. Called on Sue and in a flash decided to go up to Horton taking her with us tomorrow - with the children of course. It might be her last chance of seeing Waltergarth before young Samantha/Joseph appears.

-=-

Saturday April 19, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

Peter, Jean and Penny came at lunch after shopping in town and we went upstairs where they played with Samuel. Wilsons have a way with children. The new girl Karin worked tonight. It was deathly quiet. Ally and I stood with Mavis Adams talking about books which was interesting. We left Karin to get on with it. She seems quite good and doesn't need 'standing over'. Harold  is right though. She does have a nervous twitch, and interestingly a small hyper-active son aged 7 who is a chorister at Leeds Parish Church.

-=-

Friday April 18, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

Not feeling ill, which is miraculous. Up at 8. So strange and quiet without Samuel. We went early to Hilda's. Samuel was playing with Hayley. Hilda is a brick. We returned to the pub via Fulneck. What is this Moravian denomination?  Do they avoid pork and blood transfusions, &c? Susan Bottomley came in for a sandwich and half of lager, and was horrified when I recognised her. She puzzled over me for ages. Have I changed so much in thirteen years? June has been married to an accountant, called Brook, for 8 years and lives off Cemetery Road, Yeadon, and has two sons. "Wait until I tell her I've seen you?" said Sue. Ally went out for bread and accidentally locked me in the flat!

-=-

Thursday April 17, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

Ally to the clinic. Furious that she still isn't booked in to to the BRI. She has no intention of going to St Luke's. Tonight we went to Scorpio's Taverna. Meeting at the Pig & Whistle. John, Janette, Lynn, David, Sue, Peter, George & Jayne, and a whole company from our lounge bar. A good evening, but I sat next to Janette who is so faddy and left a perfectly good steak. John and I shared a meze (£12 each) which was gigantic. Ally looked beautiful in blue. Had a good dance but felt terribly out of shape. I used to dance all night. Home at 2:30am.

-=-

Wednesday April 16, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

Dad and Bessie phoned re their letters. Both were touched. Phoned (Auntie) Hilda who is having Samuel tomorrow. She is always willing to help. "It's what your mother would have done", she said.

-=-

Tuesday April 15, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds, LS11 5NQ

Very wet day. President Reagan has bombed Tripoli, much to the chagrin of the world with the exception of the UK. Planes from US bases here launched the attack and for some reason the yellow-bellied Lefty bastards are up in arms about it. We really should have flattened Libya in 1984 when they murdered that poor London WPC. Samuel and I wrote letters to Dad, Bessie and cousins Matthew and Simon. All on Postman Pat writing paper. Children should be encouraged to write. The telephone is a rotten invention. This area has some good independent schools. Leeds Grammar, Bradford Grammar, and Fulneck.

-=-

Monday April 14, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

Pool Knockout Night. A dead loss. Thank God for Pakistanis. Ours is Karma. Or is Karma an Indian? Cold. We are seriously thinking about independent schooling for Samuel. I'm no snob but I'll be damned if I'm going to send him to a left state school where 18 people share one battered text book and a portrait of Lenin adorns the headmaster's study. In my day it was Leslie Hore-Belisha, or Disraeli. Where the money for this venture will come from God only knows.

-=-

Sunday April 13, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

2nd Sunday after Easter

Cousin Bev.

A pushy girl came in for a bar job and did nothing but moan about her previous, nay current employer. We immediately smelled trouble and shut the door behind her with a sigh of relief. No more interviews. Quiet lunch. To Guiseley later. Beverley came tonight. A tall, striking girl. A real brick. She pulls a good pint. Much whispering about my appointing a kinswoman. I love it.

-=-

Saturday April 12, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

Staff shake-up. Chris walked in here bold as brass on Thursday and I told him to be on his way. He then asked for a 'black and tan' without so much as a flinch. Oh no. MLR will not be shit upon. He went away threatening to re-style my facial features. I will never give in to terrorism and will continue to go walkabout whenever I can. My cousin Beverley phoned me and asked whether I would ever employ a relative, and I was very pleased by the sound of her voice. She is coming here tomorrow evening to give it a bash. If I remember correctly she is a shy, bonnie, imposing girl. We interviewed from 6pm. Nobody spectacular. The first was a Karin Ireland, a friend of Gerry & Mary. Phoned Hilda re having Samuel on Thursday.

-=-

Friday April 11, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds, LS11 5NQ

Norman Wilson's threat to turn our tap room into a ghost town hasn't quite come off. He has taken the riff raff with him including Gary Rhodes, who has been going over the top recently and carrying on disgracefully with Edna's daughters. Recently he came in bearing a bollard, no doubt stolen from Dewsbury Rd. I have been lenient with him only because he must be a kinsman, albeit from an ancestor way back. Sarah Ferguson's great-uncle, Sir William Fellowes, died on April 6, aged 86. He was land agent at Sandringham 1936-64, and married Jane Ferguson, Ronnie's aunt. She died in February, aged 74. Will July 23 be a national holiday? Princess Anne's wedding day wasn't, if I remember rightly. Charles and Diana's was different. They will be anointed one day.

-=-

Thursday April 10, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

Poor Dad is becoming quite loopy, elusive and erratic. He has made it plain he is sick of his B & B existence and yet when we press him to come here for a few days he backs off. We have seen him only briefly in a month now and his grandchildren no longer seem to have the pull that they did. In fact the sight of them all together quite turns him off. At Thomas's christening he was horribly morose. The noise and the hubhub irritates and no longer does he frolic on the floor. Let us hope and pray that this is only a temporary thing. Our new pool team played here but I fell out with Norman Wilson, who stormed off in a cloud of abuse taking everyone with him. Oh dear.

-=-

Wednesday April 9, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

New Moon

Maureen worked tonight. Her first session since her vein op. She caused chaos and mayhem when spraying polish on the till and in the process dislodged a wire and brought the business of this establishment to a standstill. I had to go upstairs for Ally whose expertise with electrical faults is legendary. Needless to say she had fixed it by 10pm. We had been keeping a list of items to ring in and the bar back was piled high with notes and copper. Ally like a small hillside in a tracksuit raised gasps from the punters. And she has three months to go before baby comes! I have sent a begging letter to the YP. Where is my money for the Fergie revelations, shock horror? And do they want a family tree showing all the Dukes of York? The last two recipients of this honour received  the peerage in the birthday honours of 1892 and 1920. We shall see. Fergie will not be Princess Andrew.

-=-

Tuesday April 8, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

John is a cool customer but with a heart of gold. Ally asks him to do anything in the house and he gets on with it without ceremony or palaver. He is going to tile the bathroom too before we take up residence in May. We will never get any sense out of John and Janette. Such a volatile couple. Almost theatrical at times. ____________. Uncle Arnold has asked Dad to go to an apartment in Lanzarote with him in the summer. But Dad needs money. He turned Lynn down when she suggested a similar venture and I do hope no ill will be incurred.

-=-

Monday April 7, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

To Club St later this afternoon to light the gas pilot light. What fun. We almost cremated the piano. Ally was very tetchy about this. Samuel loves Club St. He went to bed with Ally while I attempted to strip the beams in the spare room. A rea pig it was. John and Janette came at 8pm both dressed like manual labourers, and he put 'browning' on the walls and did a good job. Janette helped mixing the plaster. Ally got up at 9 and we had tea. Janette says she and John are getting engaged very shortly. _________. We discussed the family tree. John would like a copy. Back to the Moorhouse at 12. Fagged out.

-=-

Sunday April 6, 1986

Julie Baker, Lynn & Tom, Self and Frances.

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

Low Sunday

Snow today. We went to Guiseley and to Thorpefields where Lynn has prepared a party. Poor Dad was being organised like a four year-old by Lynn, &c. We went to collect Sue after a ticking off from David about our parking on the muddy grass verge. Ally stuck to her guns, defiantly I thought, and wouldn't budge. Her resolute jaw was set. We collected Sue, Pete and the boys and went to Esholt for 2:45. Awful. 'Emmerdale Farm mania'. Japanese and other Orientals crawling everywhere with zoom lens cameras. A packed church. Two christenings. One Thomas David (ours) and one Thomas William (theres). Lynn was furious because the church was packed and she was expecting a quiet, personal family service. A good attendance from the family. Dad seemed odd and strangely distant. I cannot put my finger on it, but in recent times he has changed. Audrey Baker was very pleasant and seemed fit, and joined in all the fun and games back at the house party. And of course Frances is 5 today. Thomas stood up on the side of the font to be anointed. (I passed him to the care of the vicar), and he yelled his head off at his 'wetting'. A good buffet later. Wine, fun and pandemonium. Back here for 7.

-=-

Saturday April 5, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

Today I am 31. Ally, God bless her, made it a special day with her munificence. Samuel came in early singing 'happy birthday to you' and the three of us sat in bed opening cards and presents. Ally bought me two shirts from 'Paris', at Rawdon. Exquisite. A tie rack, and a beautiful tie with a miniature elephant reclining. Two books. "Claudius the God" by Graves and "Les Misérables" by Victor Hugo. Thorntons chocolates. Breakfast in bed. The girls and Dad all phoned before 9am. It was touching to hear Dad. Lunch. Drink downstairs. Ally and Sam to bed. I had a lager with Margaret and Audrey and they formed a plot and gave me a 'German special' one of the concoctions favoured by our Gestapo clientele. I was slightly 'tight' by 4pm. Upstairs we had rump steak, sauteed mushrooms, white wine, &c. We then lay upon cushions on the floor like Roman patricians. I failed to win the pub 'flutter' on the Grand National. Chris phoned to say he cannot work tonight and so I axed him from my front bench team. Ally very beautifully said she would do his shift. Janette phoned to say they are coming. We went down at 7 and sat sozzled in a corner. We were joined by Uncle Peter, Auntie Jean, John, Janette, George W and Jayne. A quiet night really. You have to be reasonably quiet at 31. Bed at 12:30. No high jinx. No stoppybacks. No 21 gun salute.

-=-

Friday April 4, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn Leeds LS11 5NQ

Uncle Peter is 57 today. We haven't seen him since Christmas. One of my customers makes me feel like vomiting. Joan Shelton, 58, has just been savaging the poor prime minister. "I was never out of work until she got in". And there she is (Joan) supping gallons of mild every week and living a life of Riley. She expects something for nothing. Bloody parasite. Ally went to bed early and I went down to the bar for social intercourse. A drunk, tippling whisky in the tap room, upset me at 11:30 and I physically ejected him midst the breaking of glass and furniture. My remaining customers filed out in an orderly fashion. I went to bed covered in blood and sweat.

-=-

Thursday April 3, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

Ally to Dr Duck at 9:50. ________. Believe it or not Ally has yet to be confirmed as being definitely booked in to the BRI for baby's birth. St Luke's is the designated place and whenever Ally brings up the topic with Dr Duck she says "Oh don't worry. We'll have you at the BRI. It's where you went last time." It will mean war if we are thwarted this time. A home birth in fact. Ally has a wicked look on her face. She and Samuel are in collusion over my birthday presents, and by the look of things my wife has gone mad on the plastic again. On Saturday morning all will be revealed.

-=-

Wednesday April 2, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

Lynn and the children came over this afternoon for high jinx and high tea. Ally laid on an old fashioned nursery spread and the little ones greatly appreciated it. Katie had never seen a doughnut before and sat wide eyed but refusing to touch one. Samuel was covered in jam. Little Thomas moves around like a badger and refuses to walk. David came and picked them up at 6. Lynn made a comment about the Moorhouse: "It's a typical town pub". Snobby somewhat. She perhaps should visit some of the pubs in town.

-=-

Tuesday April 1, 1986

 Moorhouse Inn, Leeds LS11 5NQ

We went over to Bradford this morning to meet Sue and Pete at Club Street where Peter installed a new kitchen sink and did the plumbing. I am very pleased with him really. Susan isn't the enormous mountain as in previous pregnancies and I pray she has a daughter. Surely not another uproarious boy? The children played well together considering the confined space. Ally went to the fish and chip shop and queued for almost an hour and returned with cold and greasy fayre. I do worry about all this work I am making for myself at Club St. It's two rooms stripped bare now and in six or seven weeks I am expected to have finished the lot. Oh dear. 

-=-