Monday March 15, 1982

 Ally is the most beautiful creature in the whole world. I sit and fix my eyes on her, soaking every bit in until she spots me, becomes restless, and looks up from her book. Luscious.

YP dull. Carol has diarrhoea, and leaves at 12. Margot suffers from some affliction which prevents her working after lunch. Sarah spent the afternoom grousing about Trevor's sisters, who are very annoyed that their children haven't been invited to their wedding. Nephews are a little too close to be ignored, I fear. Cousins, yes.

Diana: pale and thin

Home for chicken stew and dumplings at 5:30, still in daylight. Ally has a delicious tale of Frank and Bessie's weekend trip to Le Harve with the ghastly Winchester Rotary Club people. Apparently, one of their number, an alcoholic, went berserk on the rough Channel crossing and had to be kept under close guard locked in his cabin. What's more, the incarcerated gent is president of the club. Bessie giggled like a schoolgirl when she related this tale to Ally this afternoon. Gillian was absent today, and so Ally had a better day.

The Princess of Wales looks pale and thin on page 1 of today's YP. Pregnancy doesn't suit everyone, does it? Lord Spencer, we are told, is hoping for a grandson to solve the 'succession problem' and kill Michael English's Bill stone dead. Johnny is such a sensible man and I feel sure that his KG will be well received. Bed at 10.

-=-

Sunday March 14, 1982

 3rd Sunday in Lent

Out of bed at 11:30. I made an enormous fried breakfast and large pot of tea. We sat smiling at one another over our cups. Ally loves and admires my fried creations. She compares then to the photos one sees in glossy food magazines. The way to make a good fried breakfast is not to let the frying pan think it's in charge. Always show the kitchen utensils who is the boss. Romantic, that is until the handle snapped on my china cup, sending a deluge of hot tea over the mahogany table. The breakafast things were cleared away very quickly.

An afternoon of tranquil repose. Watched 'The Cruel Sea' on the BBC. A good, sloppy naval tale with a cast of thousands. Donald Sinden so young he had acne, &c.

Chicken for dinner. We are so greedy. To bed at 10. Mum phoned just as I turned out of the light. They are safely returned from Scotland. JPH is growing up. They bought him a belt of which he is very proud.

-=-

Saturday March 13, 1982

 John and Maria were joined together in Holy Matrimony six years ago this day. I sent them a card bearing the following verse:

'Sing, dance and cheer, for our John and Maria,'

'Who now for six years have been wed'

'To Scotland they went'

'Now the money's all spent'

'And I don't think they get out of bed'

Mum and Dad went to Stranraer yesterday with Jim and Margaret. I can picture the mad, heaving party at Port Patrick. Ally foolishly spent all day doing housework and then at 4:00 we went to Morrison's and spent £16, quite a lot for us.

[Deletion of personal and graphic medical details]

Jackie and Barry came at 8. We had a pub crawl to the 'Fiddler's Three', the 'Fire Brigade', the 'Drop Kick', and the 'Royal'. Barry is such amiable company. I attempted to play on the 'Space Invader' machine and give Barry a game, but blew myself up every time. Jackie seems so happy. They are going to join us with Dave L on April 3 for my birthday. Home at 11:30 and had a curry from over the road.

We closed the evening with lemon wine and Advocaat. Pissed. Jackie and Barry left after 1:45am.

-=-

Friday March 12, 1982

 Stubbornly refused to climb out of bed until the very last moment. Felt slightly rough after Mary's ridiculously extravagent measures of whisky. We were lectured on race relations last night. We were told that the Indians and Pakistanis are a far superior race to the rebellious West Indian and Caribbean types. The latter, we were told by the mindless ladies, all carry enormous chips upon their shoulders, and will never let us forget that they were once enslaved. The recent Toxteth rioters were not the turban-wearing types.

Ally and I are disgustingly boring this evening. Spaghetti for dinner [very unsubstantial]. We sat snuggled together until 9 o'clock when the ice skating championships from Copenhagen drove us upstairs to bed.

-=-

Thursday March 11, 1982

 I spent the day at the YP dwelling on Knights of the Garter and various statistics. I have discovered that since her accession to the throne the Queen has appointed no fewer than thirty eight knights companion. Her first appointment was Sir Winston Churchill in 1953. Twenty eight KGs were peers at the time of their creation and two [Avon and Slim] were ennobled later. Of all the 38 knights only one was unmarried [Amory], and surprisingly, two [the Earls of Avon and Radnor] were divorced, and re-married. This means that Earl Spencer isn't barred from the order as I surmised yesterday. The average age at the time of their appointment is 66, and of the 38 the youngest to be appointed was the 10th Duke of Northumberland, aged 45 at his elevation in 1959. The oldest gent to collect his KG from the Queen was the late Earl of Iveagh, aged 81 in 1955. The first life peer was Lord Casey [1969], and the only former prime minister now honoured is Sir Harold Wilson [1976]. Alec Home is a Knight of the Thistle. When are we going to see a black KG? Lord Chitnis, a Paki life peer, does good work for the Rowntree Tust. Is he a possibility? Perhaps too controversial, and the Queen doesn't do controversy. there are no non-royal women KGs. Ladies of the Garter to date are the Queen Mother, Princess Juliana of the Netherlands and the Queen of Denmark. When are we to have female knights companion? When Mrs Thatcher retires as PM in 1995, after three terms of continuous office, will HM give her the Garter? How would she be styled? 'Lady Margaret Thatcher, KG', or 'Margaret, Lady Thatcher, KG'? I shall have to consult Sir Anthony Wagner on this. Interesting, eh?

Home at 6. Over to see Mary [Moore] at 7:30. Sat with an enormous whisky until after 12. A pair of mindless and nauseating females joined us, putting me into a long silence. I cannot abide silly, giggly women. Mary is far superior, intellectually. Thank God for Ally's brains and good sense.

--

Wednesday March 10, 1982

 The deaths of two former chancellors of the exchequer, Amory and Butler, create two vacancies among the Knights Companion of the Order of the Garter. Will Her Majesty fill these vacancies on St George's Day? It is a great pity that Harold Macmillan never accepted. Edward Heath is out of the running, and so is [James] Callaghan. Lord Spencer would have been a candidate had he not divorced his first wife, and it's a little too early for Roy Jenkins. I'm backing the Master of the Horse, Lord Westmorland, and Cliff Richard.

Prince Edward is 18 today and the prospect of seeing him Duke of Cambridge or Sussex is a little gloomy. Gloomy for the present anyway. They are going to have to give him something before he finds a bride because what will we call her if not? Princess Edward, yes, but Princess Edward of where? The future bride requires a territorial designation.

Phoned Dave L tonight. It's been ages since we communicated. Ally sat writing and injecting some conversational note into my telephone banter. I filled Dave in on the baby Nason saga, and we arranged to go out for drinks on April 3, to celebrate my birthday. To bed, not too late.

-=-

Tuesday March 9, 1982

 Budget Day. A mild one, that is the budget, not the day. Rain.

Lord Butler of Saffron Walden, KG, died yesterday. He was perhaps the greatest post-war chancellor, who should have been prime minister.

Out at 6:30 to Guiseley for fish and chips with Sue & Peter. Christopher had slept for most of the night. Sue looks so content now. Peter bounced his son around and wore that proud expression that only new fathers have. Peter clutched his baby. I clutched a large whisky and Ally a port and lemon. 

We discussed finances and mortgages, brought on by Sir Geoffrey Howe. Pete is of the opinion that we should buy a larger house and have a bigger mortgage.

On to Pine Tops to spend a couple of hours with Mum and Dad. Pine Tops is up for sale for £37,500. A man from Edison's put up a sign this morning.

-=-