Tuesday December 13, 1983

 The Red Lion, Thornton Rd, Bradford 8

Club Street.

We left the Red Lion at 12:30 after Chris and Elaine's return. The stocktake showed a £7 defecit, but that's no problem. Chris says he will continue with the ban on our canine friends, and we took our leave and returned to Club Street. Sheryl was in at opening time to deliver her daily 'homage' of 'arse licking'. We made our escape quickly. The King is dead, long live the king, &c. Customers are apt to become unnerved  at the sight of two managers in the pub at one and the same time. Elaine pets and slobbers over her dog, Michael (named after Mike Walker from the brewery), and was so loud that the stocktaker sat with his fingers in his ears. 

At home I had fish and chips. Ally went to mothercraft classes to learn about heavy breathing and stretch marks, and I went out to buy a TV licence. Our licence expired in September and the woman in the post office looked at me aghast as though I was one, or even both, of the Kray twins. Looked at old newspapers and felt cosy at my own home on my own settee. It was odd not to ring a bell and call 'time' at 3 o'clock. News: Sir Keith Holyoake, KG, died last weel. That leaves a vacancy for me. Lady Docker has croaked too. Is Mrs T in her last term as PM? Will those foul peacewomen succeed at Greenham Common? Will Di give birth to twin princes in 1984? Is the NGA doomed? Phoned Mum to say I cannot be definite about visiting on Thursday until I have spoken to Les Gledhill. I do hope we can fit in a quiet weekend at Horton.

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Monday December 12, 1983

 Red Lion, Thornton Road, Bradford 8

Switzerland arrived at Thornton Road. I was up at dawn shovelling snow and cleaning the beer lines, &c. Ally helped filling buckets with slops.  Mrs Sheryl Hepworth, 36, the Red Lion cook, formerly Miss Seymour, claims kinship with Henry VIII and 'Princess Diana', and reckons she is in line to the Dukedom of Somerset. Last year she drove her husband, Reg, insane, and he was closeted for 8 weeks in Linfield Mount (the place where Mrs Rochester would be incarcerated if Charlotte Bronte was to write 'Jane Eyre' today). Sheryl is an aligator, only more sly. Our climax at the Red Lion. Les Gledhill paid us a quick visit to say he'll phone us on Wednesday to make arrangements for some work before Christmas. He doesn't want me 'moping' around at home. Obviously, he doesn't know me. I have never moped. Worked with Rita. Jean and Enid stayed back for drinks. Ally did the tills upstairs. We have somehow acumulated an extra £25 and so we took it for ourselves. It is the done thing. 

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Sunday December 11, 1983

 Red Lion, Thornton Road, Four Lane Ends, Bradford 8

3rd Sunday in Advent

The BRI.

Snow fell this evening. The first of the winter. Bing Crosby will be in full voice somewhere. His awful 'White Christmas' gets a hammering every bloody year. I got into the bath at opening time and let the girls get on with it. I just gave them a hand in the bar at the end. This afternoon we went up to the BRI to inspect the maternity building along with another couple who expect a bundle of joy in February. We left after an hour feeling highly nervous and well aware that the time is almost upon us. Ally looked slightly terror struck at the sight of heart monitors and breathing apparatus. Those rooms look so impersonal and clinical. This first baby caper is certainly a step into the unknown. We went on to Harden to see Jean and David. Jean pregnant but isn't big, and silent as ever. David has grown a nautical beard and was friendly as ever. They like the names Nathaniel and Samuel. We just eyed each other. Our Samuel will be born first anyway. Back to the 'Lion Rouge' for 7. Jim, Margaret and Julie came. Julie has hair like the singer Paul Young. They left in snow at 8:30 and we went out and bought a Chinese take-away.

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Saturday December 10, 1983

 Red Lion, Thornton Rd, Four Lane Ends, Bradford 8

Tel: 496684

I did not go crazy last night, and so not hungover. We only spent £11 after time, and by we I of course mean the full company. It is the anniversary of the abdication of King Edward VIII in 1936. The Duchess of Windsor is hanging on by the skin of her teeth over in Paris. It will be interesting to see what becomes of her jewels when she is no more. I hope that Queen Mary's gems don't fall into the hands of some ghastly, cheap American, and that they come home to the Crown. I had a busy afternoon with Enid, and a similar night with Jean and Rita. Jean stayed back at 11 and had a brandy by the fire. A Pakistani piled his X-reg motor up against the Co-op wall and we all went out to look. Biting cold. Our customer, old Mary, says she isn't long for this world. I'm inclined to agree with her.

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Friday December 9, 1983

 Red Lion, Thornton Road, Four Lane Ends, Bradford 8

The Red Lion.

I have ceased to make comments on national and international affairs touching us at this moment in time. To be honest I seldom see the TV news and I look at the Daily Telegraph for about ten minutes each day which is no good. According to the Press Prince William has given his father a heavy cold, and a portrait of the Duke of Edinburgh by Bryan Organ has been unveiled at the National Gallery. Amazing that no other portraits of the duke are to be found in a national collection. Organ portrays him as an ageing reptile, but it is a good likeness. We went to the bank and passed an afternoon of peaceful quietude. So unlike our life at the Why Not. 

This evening the clan gathered here to see how I am coping.John and Janette arrived first followed by Lynn and Dave, then Karen, Steve, Di, Paul, Jill and Tim. I wasn't expecting to see the Pudsey crowd at all. Finally, in walked Marlene and Frank, and they didn't expect to see their Pudset kinfolk either. Marlene was only expecting the Rhodes delegation. Poor Sue has a galloping Delhi belly, and is indisposed. I had to work but kept joining the revellers on the other side. I ejected a youth, who, whilst drunk, fell over the coal scuttle and mangled it, and then threatened to rape a blue-rinsed matron from Heaton. No violence however. Lynn and Dave had to leave at 11 because Audrey was sitting with the children but we entertained the remaining crew to a private drink. Paul seemed enthralled by pub life and I showed him the cellars. He squealed with delight at the sight of wooden barrels. _______. John says business isn't doing too well and he cannot see Rhodes & Ettenfield going public in the near future. They all left after a couple of drinks and we took to our bed. All the girls had been in pearls.Karen, in a tartan suit and patent shoes looked like Ruth, Lady Fermoy.

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Thursday December 8, 1983

 Red Lion, Thornton Road, Four Lane Ends, Bradford 8

Ally went to see Sister Matthews but first she saw an old haridan who gasped when poor pet mounted the scales. My poor wife weighs almost 10 stones. She says she's been eating the wrong food. This is true. Since we came here it's been a flow of deep fried this and deep fried that - not in any way beneficial to young Sam/Clemmie. Sister Matthews wasn't distressed saying Ally is progressing well. Our baby has dropped into 'take off' position. She always comments on Ally's pretty dresses. We now eagerly await the big day. Ally was very good with Mum and Dad on Tuesday and offered them room and shelter at Club Street throughout the accouchement. Mum wants to be around and 'involved'. 

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Wednesday December 7, 1983

 Red Lion, Thornton Road, Four Lane Ends, Bradford 8

Ally & Lynn.

Day off. Mum and Dad went off to Settle to collect a frozen turkey from the Co-op. They're making a Christmas dinner for guests on Saturday. We went to Ashley Mills to look at nappies, but bought none. Should we purchase Zorbit ones, that is the question? Cold, freezing day. On to the Butcher's Arms at Pudsey where we had lunch with Rob and Kath Piper. It's a very suitable tavern and both Ally and I would have it if we had the opportunity. Rob told us to go to Hunslet to look at the Moorhouse Inn which is vacant. The place doesn't sound good as it's surrounded by multi-storey flats and is next door to a Salvation Army citadel. Oh dear. On at 3pm to Lynn's. We found her walking with the pram in Guiseley and we went back to Thorpefields for tea and cake. The house is freezing. The Bakers do not use the central heating and an icy chill hangs throughout the house. The children's fingers are blue with cold. Frances is going to be an angel in the playschool nativity play, and she sang one of the songs, but very quietly. Ally, straining to hear, says it's 'We Will Rock You'. Back to the Red Lion for 6. I lit a fire for Enid and then went upstairs. Len Fairclough has been 'killed off' on Coronation Street.

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Tuesday December 6, 1983

 Red Lion, Thornton Road, Four Lane Ends, Bradford 8

Sun, but frost. Up at 6:30 and off out in a frost coated Mandy Metro at 8:30 to Rochdale, and the Kingsway Hotel. It isn't as far as I thought it would be. Mike Walker and Les Gledhill were setting up a conference room in an impoverished lounge decorated in Why Not wallpaper, to make me feel at home. The trainees from the Linthorpe (not the bearded one) was there.They go to Levenshulme tomrrow and then from Dec 16th to Jan 3rd to the Emmott Arms. Others there include a chap from Blackpool and Ron Brook, Cheshire Midland, &c. The conference was hosted by the peculiar Don Bywater, who has been doing this for 14 years, but makes it look like his first attempt. He went over the 1974 legislation and set out different examples. Lunched on steak. Ally was uncomfortable on the hard, school-like chairs, but didn't complain. We watched a ridiculous educational film where a woman was slicing off her limbs trapped in canteen equipment which made Les Gledhill feel queasy and had us all giggling. We left at 4. Via Club Street to the 'Lion Rouge', as Ally calls it. Jean was holding the fort. I lit the fire and listened to news of the afternoon. Two 70 year-olds had a punch up at 3pm over their dogs and both were ejected by Enid and Jean. 'No Dogs Allowed' signs go up. Chris and Elaine can sort it out when they get back. Who should walk in at 7 but Mum and Dad who had been at Sue's. Ally came down and we had a few pre-prandials. Mum had been given whisky at the Nasons and was soon intoxicated on whisky and American dry, and so at 8:30 we went upstairs. Dad and I went out and bought prawn curry for us all. I ate like a half starved puma. We argued about the date of birth of cousin Reggie's baby. I insist Richard was born on March 4, but Mum insists Apr 8th. There was a minor skirmish in the tap room over a Yorkshire terrier.  Tired. We all went to bed at 1:30.

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Monday December 5, 1983

 Red Lion, Thornton Road, Four Lane Ends, Bradford 8

Ally and I were out at the bank this morning when Les Gledhill dropped in. He waited for us to return. I told him I am going to a health and safety at work seminar tomorrow and he said he'd be present too and suggested that perhaps Ally should be there as well. This is a great idea because I didn't fancy a long day on my own in far off Rochdale. Sheryl 'the mouth' worked this evening instead of Rita, who has a cold. Sheryl has been called for jury service at Leeds Crown Court for two weeks from Dec 12th, and is going to try and get an exemption certificate from her doctor. She suffers from "arthuritis" and says she'll be crippled sitting in a jury box until Christmas. But I think one has to be dying to escape jury service.

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Sunday December 4, 1983

 2nd Sunday in Advent

Red Lion, Thornton Road, Four Lane Ends, Bradford 8

Sue, Ally & Christopher.

Up at 7:30 with a dry throat. I went down to play with my barrels in the cellar. I derive more pleasure meddling with the wooden casks of ale than I did with the great tanks at the Why Not. The method of serving up beer in this manner cannot have changed for many years. When Sue phoned recently she said that JPH and Catherine have been in Guiseley and had visited West End Terrace. JPH, she says, is looking more like me. He has my 'long face' (her words). Do I have a long face? Surely, I am rugged yet gentle and with stream-lined contours giving a virile countenance. Lunchtime was soon upon us. Jean yelled upstairs that a lady had come to see us. I went down to find Marlene in the tap room. Frank, Mark, and Auntie Mabel followed. Poor Ally had just submerged her gigantic frame into the bath and so I went down to entertain my dear relations. They were impressed by the place. It is certainly drab from without. I sat with the Pudsey quartet until 2 and then we went up to see Ally, beautiful, bedecked in pearls. We had a brandy downstairs in the lounge after time. It was Auntie Mabel's first 'stoppyback' in all her 64 years. 

Mark looks very young. His voice has broken, and he's doing his mock O levels this week. He seemed deep in thought. They left at 3 and we went to Pamela's at Shipley where the remnants of Rebecca's christening party were to be found. Jim and Co were playing cards in the smoke-filled dining room. Sue was eager to leave and we took them to Guiseley. Christopher is very blond and leggy.  They laughed. The christening, in the Sunday morning service (Metholdist) went on for TWO hours and at the end a drunk wandered in and demanded that they all should sing his favourite hymn ... which they did. Hilarious. Sadly, Sue cannot recall what hymn it was. A boring lament. We had chilli con carne and I slipped into a coma in an armchair. Back to the Red Lion for 7. Sheryl didn't get away until 11:30, and was attempting to have her own private 'stoppyback'. We watched TV in a horizontal position. A Bette Davis film.

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Saturday December 3, 1983

 Red Lion, Thornton Road, Four Lane Ends, Bradford 8

Bright and sunny but we didn't get chance to go out and wallow in the autumn sunshine. One cannot be a fresh air fiend in this game. However, I am looking forward to scaling Pen-y-ghent with Papa. I have been dreaming about rats or mice. What can this mean in my subconscious? A clever pyschologist has published a book saying that to dream of a roller skating bishop signifies ones inner desire to campaign for the ordaination of women priests. I went to buy coal from the guy next door. The young salesman looks like Boy George. Ally wearing her now tight pink nightie made porridge. _______. Saturday actually feels like a Saturday at the Red Lion. Ally points out that the customers actually treat it like a pub and not like a second home as they did in Hemlington. The pub (here) is set to be demolished in 1986 when the traffic lights outside are to make way for a massive roundabout. So sad. Sam Smiths have chosen a new site close by but new pubs are hateful and lacking in character. A quiet night. Jean and Rita worked from 8 and so I had an hour upstairs. Ally sneaked home this evening to collect some cash from the 'Clemmie Fund' which we are going to bag and bank. In April we had £60.16. Susan phoned and asked if we can pick them up from Pamela's tomorrow. Rebecca is being christened and we can see them all after the ceremonial. I argued with a youth who was trying to buy some under age girls lager. The were given Coca Cola but I was far from happy. Upstairs at 12 after messing with the till that was mangling the till roll. 

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